Really worried about my niece. WWYD??

Makinroom4baby

I've been on my sister about carseat safety ever since my niece was a newborn. My sister would put this LITTLE baby in this HUGE convertible carseat, STILL SWADDLED!!! I told her that it was dangerous not having her completely strapped in and my sister would just say "That's the only way she will ride without screaming". My niece is now 3 yrs old and the situation is worse. I'd seen my sister strap my niece into the seat with the chest buckle down to her waistline and the straps hanging off of her shoulders. One day my sister called me and told me "Livy flew out of her carseat today." And to make matters worse, my sister was LAUGHING about it. She said my niece was with her dad and he slammed on brakes and Livy fell out of the seat, landed on the floor of the truck and jumped up and said I'm ok. And she had a bruise on her head. My sister found that funny. I said Girl do you know that could have been so much worse?!?! I told her that she needs to pull those straps tighter on her b/c what she does is pull her arms out and then she's not strapped in. My sister said, well she screams when I have her in tight so I told her, Tight is the right way, so let her scream, at least she'll be alive. I was hoping she got the point.

Well last week Jayden and I went to a bday party with them. We rode in my sisters car. I noticed that my sister was putting her child in the seat in record time and I'd still be strapping Jayden in. I got in my seat and turned around to look at the kids and I see my niece with just the chest buckle latched (that she knows how to take off!!) and the  straps hanging off of her shoulders. AND the crotch strap was NOT BUCKLED!! I was mortified. And then, since it was Livy's bedtime. my sister reclined the seat to where it was practically lying in a supine position. Now I didn't know it was safe to do that in a forward facing car seat. I told my sister, if you don't start strapping her in correctly you may end up regretting it. She simply said, She's a big girl. I'm really worried about my niece

ErinNConnorsMom

I am sooo sorry.  I know that would make me sick to see my poor, defenseless niece in that situation.  IDK...your sister obviously knows how to use a carseat correctly, but she chooses not to.  What I may do in your situation other ppl may not agree with, but I would call the police dept (non emergency line) and let them know what's going on with your niece and ask what I could do about it.  What a crappy situation to be in.  

penguingrrl

That really sucks, but I think you've unfortunately done all you can.  If the seat can move into a reclined position I can't imagine it's installed correctly either.  I just don't understand how you could knowingly disregard carseat safety.  I would imagine calling the police wouldn't do anything unfortunately since I doubt she would listen.  Why other using a carseat at all?  I think she'd be safer in a regular seatbelt than that.

joseysbride

Wow.  What an awful position to be in.  I don't even know what I'd do.  Would you ever get the opportunity to put your neice in her seat yourself properly and explain to the neice that if she isn't buckled in exactly this way she could die.

Sounds harsh, but I have had to use that with my dd a couple times when she was younger and would fight the seat.  The one time my FIL put her in and he didn't buckle the chest clip right away, she FREAKED out saying she was going to die.  Maybe she would do the same with her mom?

I just find it extrememly sad that a mother wouldn't care enough to make sure her child was safe in the car, considering the number of people who die in vehicular accidents every day.

Maybe you'd even want to find some of the horrifying youtube videos on carseat safety to give her a bit of a reality check?

Ciarrai

Personally, I think I'd call the police and ask them to check on it sometime when I knew she was out and about.  I hate to do that to family, but it's about safety!  Maybe being stopped and lectured by the police would help.    

Makinroom4baby

penguingrrl:

I think she'd be safer in a regular seatbelt than that.

This is EXACTLY what I told my husband when I got home. And this was last week and it's still bothering me

Josey, my niece is not very friendly towards me. If I strap her in correctly when her mom never does, she will not listen to a thing I have to say to her. She'll just kick and scream, unfortunately. I think I just may send my sister a youtube video, but I think she will miss the point. I've already told her that not strapping her daughter in could end up horrible, I've even tried leading by example by strapping Jayden in correctly while Livy is next to him hanging out of her seat. I may just have to contact the police but then how would they reach her? Go to her house?? This is incredibly frustrating, but it's something I wouldn't be able to deal with if my niece is killed b/c of it.

Makinroom4baby

Ciarrai:

Personally, I think I'd call the police and ask them to check on it sometime when I knew she was out and about.  I hate to do that to family, but it's about safety!  Maybe being stopped and lectured by the police would help.    

So I would just call the PD and have them to show up someplace where she is? I think this may be my only option, unfortunately.

joseysbride

Makinroom4baby:

Ciarrai:

Personally, I think I'd call the police and ask them to check on it sometime when I knew she was out and about.  I hate to do that to family, but it's about safety!  Maybe being stopped and lectured by the police would help.    

So I would just call the PD and have them to show up someplace where she is? I think this may be my only option, unfortunately.

Yeah, I wasn't sure about calling the police and if and how they would respond.

I'm sorry.   I would be just as upset about this as you are.  I mean, when you flat out tell someone that something they are doing could be cause for their child to DIE, and they don't care?  It sounds like your sister lets her daughter walk all over her in more ways than one, so this is probably only the beginning of their problems.  Best of luck!

How has Jayden been doing?  I haven't seen you on here in awhile.

Ciarrai

Makinroom4baby:

Ciarrai:

Personally, I think I'd call the police and ask them to check on it sometime when I knew she was out and about.  I hate to do that to family, but it's about safety!  Maybe being stopped and lectured by the police would help.    

So I would just call the PD and have them to show up someplace where she is? I think this may be my only option, unfortunately.

Unfortunately, I don't know that they could/would do anything unless they actually saw it.  I mean, they could say they got an anonymous tip that she was stripping her daughter in wrong, but she could say she wasn't and they couldn't do anything.  If they "caught her in the act" so to speak, they would at least give her a ticket and not let her drive away without strapping her daughter in.  I just don't know if they would do more than write a ticket and I know you don't want anything like that.  Still, that's so scary and dangerous!!

darlene'smommy

I would call the cops one day when you know shes out and what street she is on.  Give them car info my maybe plate number abd say you just drove past her and she did not have buckled in a seat (if the straps are haging off then you would not be able to tell). They will pull her over and give her a ticket and a point on her record.  Then she has to fix it before she can take off.