The truth is....I WANT TO WORK!

Roco&Leche

We are expecting baby number 3 AND way too many people are expecting me to quit working since "there aren't any benefits for me to LEAVE my children while spending SOOOOO much money"!.

Childcare will be somewhat expensive but the truth is there are tons of reasons starting with the fact that I WANT TO WORK.  I like what I do and the people I interact with.

Also, DH has his own business and I carry the insurance.  A big big relief for our family.  Plus, my employer provides so many other benefits like 100% free tuition for me, spouse and dependants including stepchildren.  403B with an 8% match, and cant forget SANITY.

Why cant people just mind their own business and realize that its a family matter, i.e. ME and my husband!

AlisaS

You are a selfish beotch. Your kids will be seeking the treatment of therapists their whole lives, don't ya know?

oct11bride03

I was debating posting a poll but didn't want to stir the pot even more. I'm curious how many of the people on here WANT to work vs. NEED to work. I actually enjoy working and I think it makes me a better mom. I was fully planning to be a SAHM, but after DD was born I realized I'm not cut out for that life. I don't see why it's anyone's business.

shouldbworkin

Word!  We're TTC #3 and I have no plans on SAH.  I'm sure some people will be judgy and wonder why I have 3 kids if I don't want to spend time with them.  I would go nuts SAH.  I love my kids and I'd love to have a couple extra hours with them on work days (which I might get someday), but I like working, I like what I do, I have a good balance and it keeps me sane. 

haleymay18

But isn't it expensive?

Don't you want to see all your children's milestones?

How will they know who their mom is?

Don't you love your family more?

Personally, I am disgusted and insulted by your choice.

::runs to return to own job::

AlisaS

oct11bride03:

I was debating posting a poll but didn't want to stir the pot even more. I'm curious how many of the people on here WANT to work vs. NEED to work. I actually enjoy working and I think it makes me a better mom. I was fully planning to be a SAHM, but after DD was born I realized I'm not cut out for that life. I don't see why it's anyone's business.

Basically this kind of thing turns in to a "How much money does your DH make?"  and there is no answer. Do I need to work if my husband makes 50K? 100K? 500K?  Too many factors.

Roco&Leche

AlisaS:

oct11bride03:

I was debating posting a poll but didn't want to stir the pot even more. I'm curious how many of the people on here WANT to work vs. NEED to work. I actually enjoy working and I think it makes me a better mom. I was fully planning to be a SAHM, but after DD was born I realized I'm not cut out for that life. I don't see why it's anyone's business.

Basically this kind of thing turns in to a "How much money does your DH make?"  and there is no answer. Do I need to work if my husband makes 50K? 100K? 500K?  Too many factors.

In all honesty my husband's income wont/doesnt affect my choice. I like the security of being a working mom too and having insurance through my employer. My mom worked and I know I turned out great! 

risysmama

Roco&Leche:

AlisaS:

oct11bride03:

I was debating posting a poll but didn't want to stir the pot even more. I'm curious how many of the people on here WANT to work vs. NEED to work. I actually enjoy working and I think it makes me a better mom. I was fully planning to be a SAHM, but after DD was born I realized I'm not cut out for that life. I don't see why it's anyone's business.

Basically this kind of thing turns in to a "How much money does your DH make?"  and there is no answer. Do I need to work if my husband makes 50K? 100K? 500K?  Too many factors.

In all honesty my husband's income wont/doesnt affect my choice. I like the security of being a working mom too and having insurance through my employer. My mom worked and I know I turned out great! 

Well said.

KOscar

Good for you!  I get that question when I say I'd like to have two.  The answer is the same as yours, I'll return to work.  It always amazes me when people imply I should be a SAHM.  One, I would go bonkers.  Two, I have my masters degree and it cost me a lot of money.  I'm sure as heck using that degree!  Third, there's more benefits to work than just a pay check (401 K, health insurance, etc.)  Lastly, it's the right decision for me and my family, end of story.  

luvmagoldn

I have three kids and have always worked full time.  The thing is, if you have  been successful in your career and make enough to have money left over after child care for three children - kudos to you!  To me that is a huge achievement when you consider that the average household salary in the US in 2007 was $50,000.  The issue of women staying home when child care takes up too much of their income is not a problem every woman has. 

I also think a lot of people assume that you cannot manage multiple children and working.  You can.  You need help to do it but it can be done.  So stay the course and do what works for your family! 

 

naflmj

I hear you, I am so excited to return to work though I love my time with DS. When we went through IVF, and transferred 2 embryo's, everyone assumed if both stuck, I would stay at home because that would make sense. In truth, I would love if I could work part time but I can't imagine not working...I love what I do and love contributing to my family.

DallasHorn

luvmagoldn:

I have three kids and have always worked full time.  The thing is, if you have  been successful in your career and make enough to have money left over after child care for three children - kudos to you!  To me that is a huge achievement when you consider that the average household salary in the US in 2007 was $50,000.  The issue of women staying home when child care takes up too much of their income is not a problem every woman has. 

I also think a lot of people assume that you cannot manage multiple children and working.  You can.  You need help to do it but it can be done.  So stay the course and do what works for your family! 

 

Well said. The people I know that stay at home are women who's take home pay truly doesn't surpass or barely surpasses their childcare costs.  I feel like I would do more of a disservice to my kids giving up my job and all that goes along with it: benefits, a retirement fund w/ employer contributions, the ability to fund college savings, affording fun vacations, etc, etc, etc. 

Now that said, if we were incredibly wealthy and didn't have to think about needing health insurance or funding retirement, then I would leave my job and find something to do that interests me...opening a scrapbooking store, working at a musuem, starting my own business. It's not that I wouldn't do something, but would have much more freedom to do what I want.

naflmj

shouldbworkin:

Word!  We're TTC #3 and I have no plans on SAH.  I'm sure some people will be judgy and wonder why I have 3 kids if I don't want to spend time with them.  I would go nuts SAH.  I love my kids and I'd love to have a couple extra hours with them on work days (which I might get someday), but I like working, I like what I do, I have a good balance and it keeps me sane. 

I know SAHM's who have 3 kids and still don't spend time with them...that to me is a problem. I used to nanny for a family of 4 and mom golfed and shopped all day while I worked full time and many nights as well...the working dad was usually the one who would come home to relieve me.