Need Advice....Nanny, Daycare, Etc

Emcat1980@yahoo.com

My H and I are having a little bit of a dilemma. We have had a nanny for our son since he was 10 weeks old. She is a nice lady, speaks mostly Spanish but we have been able to communicate pretty well. She and my son have bonded and she seems genuinely fond of him. But...we are afraid he is not getting the physical or congnitive stimulation he needs at this age. There have been a series of clues pointing towards this over the past months. We have been talking about putting him into a local Montessori daycare (there are about 8 kids in the combined infant/toddler class right now)....in order to get him a little more stimulation and social interaction.

Specifically he has a gross motor delay.... he's now in PT twice a week. I am not blaming her, but again, a number of clues have made me think that she is doing nothing to encourage him to become more mobile (and may even be discouraging him...). I am not sure she is talking to him enough, reading to him enough, playing with him enough, etc..... We have "surprised" them a few times by coming home at odd hours, and I honestly think she is just skimping on the interaction..KWIM?

I wish I could say that specific directions and showing by example would work with our nanny, but I'm just not sure it would. To be honest, I don't think she is that interested in chasing after a soon-to-be-toddler. Because, as we all know, it's hard work!

To make matters more confusing, we are moving away in 6 months, so any changes will be temporary.

So we are really unsure of our next step.....stick with the nanny and try to encourage her toward what we want? Put him in the Montessori daycare part time and still have her come the other days? Put him in full time daycare? Look for another nanny? (we did not use an agency so would be starting over from scratch).

(FYI having the nanny take him places to "socialize" him like storytime at the library, Little Gym, etc. is out b/c my H is dead set against him riding in the car with anybody but us)

Any thoughts? I am so overwhelmed and upset about all of this....

Iblamethebeer

What were your reasons for choosing a nanny instead of daycare?  Is the Montessori school willing to take a part time infant?

6 months is a long time.  It sounds to me like you should move him into full time daycare.

 

roxyu

If you feel the nanny is hindering his development then what are you waiting for?  IMO, if she's not stimulating your child or encouraging development, when your child obviously needs it, then you should change caregivers immediately. It's great and all that she seems fond of your child, but she is not doing her job-fire her!

makclair

Em- Can you put him in daycare and will it work with your hours/DH's hours? If so , I would 100% encouraged you to put him in a group setting. He will thrive around the other kids his age!

Connor has been in daycare since 8 weeks, and although I am sure he would have done great with a one on one nanny as a smaller infant, he learns so much for the other kids his age! I have noticed so much more growth and development spurts as he has moved into the toddler class.

 

Feel free to email me.

Feb3

The rate that our LOs are developing at that age, six months might as well be six years.  I wouldn't waste a day on childcare you're not happy with, especially if there's an alternative readily available.

We had a nanny when DD was a baby and it was great, but around 9-10 mo we started seeing how a group setting would benefit DD.  We switched to daycare at 12 mo.  I'd recommend making the switch.

Emcat1980@yahoo.com

We originally chose a nanny over daycare because we're both residents and work a lot. We are now nearing the end of residency though, so our schedules are getting easier and my husband's has become quite flexible. The daycare hours would be totally do-able now. We were also not thrilled about him invariably getting sick from the daycare setting, but now that he's older we're less worried about that as well.

Mary, I will send you an email and detail all of this. I have been so frazzled lately with this worry.

All of you, thanks, I think you have cemented the decision with me. I have already emailed the Montessori school and they do have room for him! I would appreciate any more input as well!

 

duchess0727

My daughter has gross motor delays and she is in daycare.  I am a little bit undecided about whether she would be better off at home with a nanny because of the one on one interaction.  But I've spoken with the director and the teachers and they have been more than willing to do all of the exercises that I've asked and I really do like the interaction with other kids that she gets and I do think it's a positive influence.