** meghan **

ShanJosh777

meghan_marie:

Maybe he'll stop being a douche if I don't persue cs. Maybe.. maybe...

I just saw your post in my thread below.  I normally don't like to give unsolicited advice, and I don't know your situation, but I think that unless there is fear of abuse, you should file for support.  Your child is entitled to it.  And you should do it through the courts. 

I have seen a lot of women think that they don't need to go through the courts because they have an out-of-court arrangement where 'he is paying me more than I would get anyway' or something like that.  Well, if he wants to pay you more than he is legally obligated to, great!  He can still do that through the court.  The ONLY reason a man would want to keep things out of court is so that he has the option of not paying.  I'm not sure how it works in your state, but here it took me two months to get a hearing date, and now it will probably be another month of processing before they start wage attachment.  So if you wait until he misses a payment... you could be stuck for 3+ months when you do decide to go to court.

And honestly, if he's being a DB anyway, who cares if he MIGHT not be one if you give up one of your rights? 

Just my opinion. I hope everything works out for you, and I'm sure it will.  You seem really sweet and like you are taking the right steps for yourself and baby.

ShanJosh777

Ugh, that does suck.  You would think he would want better for his kid than his dad did for him, ya know?? 

Here in PA custody and support are two separate issues.  So I can see how it would be hard to fight for support if it also meant giving up custody.  I don't know what I would have done then. 

But they don't do wage attachment??  That is crazy that he never had to pay.  Here you can lose your drivers license and go to jail over child support.  That is really sad that they don't do more to hold fathers accountable.

fauxshelley

meghan_marie:

Oh and Shelly!! I talked to his sister! He left the babies in the car while he and his dad went into a bar (Cyd, his sister, does not let her kids see their grandpa because of the way he neglected her as a child). The windows were rolled down but they stayed in the car for 2 hours. Colin (4) told her this later when he came home feeling "sick". He was dehydrated. I'm not sure y'all know much about Louisiana heat but it gets HOT.

OMG.  I hope you never have to leave your child in his care.  Children die in cars all of the time from over heating.  Most of the time its an accident, but he did it on purpose!?!?   Did she document this or call the police?  

I wouldn't worry too much about him asking for 50/50 custody.  Most southern courts are very pro-mom (I'm not saying it's right, I'm just saying thats the way it is)  He would have to go to a lot of expense (Hello, Mr. Cheapskate) to even fight for it.  If for some reason he did decide to go that route, you could use the "leaving his nephews in the hot car while he went in a bar" incident against him.

blondnearby

It is a federal law that a state must have support enforcement services.

I found this here 

ENFORCING ORDERS,SES can enforce payment of support by:

• Income assignment
• Interception of state and federal tax refunds
• Interception of lottery winnings
• Suspension of occupational, professional, drivers?, hunting and fishing licenses
• Suspension of motor vehicle registration
• Contempt of court hearings
• Passport denials

More than 65% of the money collected each year comes through the income assignment process. 
 

This is for the state of Lousiana.  You could at least collect his tax returns each year.