I need a sounding board/advice

madhatter2003

This is the tough part of being a manager  =(

Coworker is coming in tomorrow to talk options while his DD is undergoing chemo (she'll start this week).

The options I've come up with (still have to run by big boss)
1. He does qualify for FMLA, so obviously I'll give him that option. He can take it all at once fully or spread it out over several months if he wants to drop to part time, etc.

2. Let him increase telecommuting time (he currently does 2 days a week, we can probably let him do up to 4 most weeks).

3. I'll give him an easier workload...not as much 'fun' work but more 'mindless'....I figure he won't be focused at all obviously.

4. Or just let him play it by ear for now and work his full time hours when he can, a mix of in office and telecommuting but just sort of go day by day for now (this is how I'm leaning, along with #3 until they know the treatment effects, etc).

What would you guys do/present? This is so tough.  Is there a completely obvious solution I'm overlooking. 

They expect chemo to run about 6 months.

renebean319

i've never gone through chemo treatments with anyone in my family before but do you think the beginning would be the hardest time for him to come in?

thats what i'm thinking and in that case i would let him do the fmla at first and then ease him back in with more telecommuting.

thats a really tough situation for him to be in (and you).

thank god i'm not a manager! lol

gl 

CMDR513

I'd present all the doable options to the guy. Let him decide. He may want to work his regular hours to keep his mind busy, etc.

notmommyoftheyear

I think it's great that you've come up with a number of options for him to choose from.  It's going to be so hard for him, but it sounds like you're understanding and supportive.  That will help him greatly, I'm sure. 

suzymarie

One thing you may want to consider- he may have serious concerns about germs.  Like if ANY coworker even just has the sniffles or a little cough, he may need to not come into the office.  You might want to ask about it and figure out if there is some way to negotiate that. 

Erika&Brian

I think a combo of 3 and 4 for now and see how it goes. Given that their medical expenses will likely be high, I doubt he wants #1 now. I work in HR and have seen numerous people go through family illnesses etc. and we have always been very accomodating, and unless absenteeism/unavailability gets excessive (job not getting done) we don't require them to take any type of formal leave. I think he will do his best to get what he has to get done, the last thing he wants is to lose his job on top of everything else.

risysmama

Is it possible for you to present all options and/or ask him how he wants to handle it?  I think they are all reasonable and extremely considerate of what he is going through (we need more bosses like you!!!)

Rachel2315

You are an awesome manager for being so flexible - I try to do the same for my employees but often get the side eye from those above me. I think presenting the options to him - asking if he has any of his own ideas - then sort of playing it by ear is the way to go. Thevsitustion may change weekly depending on hoe his DD is feeling at that time.

Lulu0802

Wow, I wish my managers were as flexible and accomodating as you are.  That's really awesome that you can give him so many options.  Like the pps said, he probably won't want to take FMLA, unless he's got a lot of vacation time saved up so he still gets paid.  I would offer him all the options and see what he thinks.

EastCoastBride

Just be careful on the FMLA thing.  I'm not an expert by any means, but as it is job protection - if he wants to use it while also using sick or vacation time, he can be allowed to do that! 

Telling him he can use that and then also go PT - I dont' know if you can legally do that.  I might be wrong,t hough.  I am not an expert.

But again- it is ONLY job protection.  He can submit for it and use it to protect his job while he is taking time off to go to his DD's appts, etc.  Even (again) while also using his paid leave.

madhatter2003

Thanks all...you've given me some good points to add in later today.  I hadn't thought about the germ thing, so that's a good one to consider.

 I'm not sure on the FMLA thing either, I know when I took it for maternity leave they offered that I could take the 12 weeks all at once, or spread it out if I wanted to come back at reduced hours. We are going to bring our HR person into the meeting later...but I'm just going to go over the options and let him decide once they know the treatment schedule, if she'll be outpatient or in the hospital, etc.

smiles4ya

You are a good boss for thinking thru these different options for him. 

EastCoastBride

madhatter2003:

Thanks all...you've given me some good points to add in later today.  I hadn't thought about the germ thing, so that's a good one to consider.

 I'm not sure on the FMLA thing either, I know when I took it for maternity leave they offered that I could take the 12 weeks all at once, or spread it out if I wanted to come back at reduced hours. We are going to bring our HR person into the meeting later...but I'm just going to go over the options and let him decide once they know the treatment schedule, if she'll be outpatient or in the hospital, etc.

Eh, that's true.  I know that's been offered where I work too.  So, yeah, it might not be an issue. I would assume, though, that this situation is when the person doesn't have paid leave.

My old employer, mat leave was 100% paid leave - so of course everyone took their FMLA at the same time.  But if I weren't getting paid and could do a part time gig, that would probably be really appealing!

ai&Jas

I think you are a wonderful manager for being so supportive and offering him these options and flexibility. My MIL recently passed away from lung cancer and I can personally say that we were taking each cycle of treatment at a time. I can only speak to her experience but while the treatments were on a set regimen; the side effects (infections, fatigue, kidney failures etc) were very unpredictable, what with sudden doctors visits and at times hospitalizations. It was a very stressful year for us. These side effects also delayed the chemo treatments.

Obviously tour employee's daughters situation will be very different due to the disease she has and also her age etc. But I suspect he will appreciate the easier workload (if his pride doesnt get in the way first), telecommuting and flexibility and also knowing that he has a job that he can keep because those medical bills do add up! For us the emotional rollercoaster was the worst, followed by the unexpected trips to the ER.

 Good luck to both of you!