2nd Trimester

Need to vent about my aunt and my registry

I'm sorry in advance. I don't typically do this, but I need to vent to someone before I blow up at her big time.

So, I love my aunt, but that whole side of the family is crazy and secretivie and in your business all.the.time.. I'm glad I live far away. Okay, so my one aunt and uncle just split up (she married in). I asked for her number and address so I could tell her about the baby. In the course of the conversation, it came up that I wanted to invite her to my shower when that happens. My aunt told me that "we'll have to see. I'm not sure we'll invite her". Ummm...excuse me. Its my shower. I don't care how you feel about her, she's still my aunt, I still love her, and you can suck it up for 2 darn hours.

So then today, she found my registries (yes, I believe I will change the names until shower invites go out now). And she's already commenting: Don't you want this? Don't you need that? You really should have this. Etc Etc Etc!! Okay, first, I already said I'm not done and I know things will change. Second, when I say I don't want a nursery SET because I don't need all the pieces, shut up and respect that! She doesn't have kids and has never made a baby registry. Granted, her friend has two little girls and my aunt was very involved with them from birth, but that does not make her an expert. 

Then, she tried to hijack the shower from my mom after insisting that we do one up by them so they don't have to drive to me. The shower there will be in April. Yes. Pleae feel free to make an 8 month pregnant woman drive 3hours to you so you are comfortable! And I got mad and told her that my mom's sister who lives in the area offered to assist and host the shower there so she'd have to discuss helping with the shower with my mom who is the real hostess and not with me even though I'm the mom. I will be the guest even if I am 8 months pregnant and driving 3hrs to make her happy.

Okay. Thanks for reading all that. I'm still fuming, but I'm going to try to relax about it because its not worth the stress. And I still have group project for online class to do. *sigh*

Re: Need to vent about my aunt and my registry

  • I don't understand why people think that you need to make YOUR baby about them.  How rude.  Tell your mom how you feel and that you'd really like to have it close by (if you have it far, not only would you have to make the drive, but then you'd have to get all the presents back to your house), and then let her deal with your aunt.
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  • deep breath in....now exhale....

    families are crazy - end of story! Just remember that you cannot control what they say or what they do - and that you can't choose your family!! I'm sorry you're getting put in the middle of it all

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  • Let her talk and continue on your day as you please.  You can either take her ideas and run with them or let them go in one ear and out the other.

    As far as the shower goes... I'll be going 5 hours south for mine because everyone I know is down there.  I moved in June of 09 and only know my in-laws here so it only makes since.   I'll just take the bigger car with me so I can bring all my gifts back with me. 

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  • Thank you everyone! Shan, I actually just breathed with your post lol.

    As far as the shower goes, Its not so much having to bring everything back, my mom has a minivan and I have an SUV. Its more that I live here, my friends live here, DH's family and friends live here, and most of my moms family lives here or is more than willing, even expecting, to drive here for it. My dad's family is who is not willing despite the fact that we go there for all holidays. They seem to have no problem putting us out. For our wedding, everone came up here except them. Instead, they got upset when I couldn't fit in an extra trip to see them, so they combined my shower with the holiday at the time and insisted I drive up for that. I think its rude that they could all come up in one car togetether for the shower but instead they want me to make the drive at 8months pregnant. I would understand if everyone was there, but everyone is here. So now I have to have two showers just for the 3 of them. It just makes me furious that they act like everything should drop for them, but they can't even be bothered to call me every month or less...or at all for that matter.

    I'm not fighting with all of you by the way. I'm going to try to let what she's saying go in one ear and out the next as recommended. I think I'm just irritated to begin with, and now she is really hiting all the wrong nerves

  • Hey Strawberry!  Sorry you are having problems with the family and your shower! 

    I am going to drive almost 3 hours to my mom's for my shower because all my family live down there, and it is silly for me to have one here b/c no one would show up besides a few friends that live nearby.  The only thing is, I will be going down around my birthday, which is April 10th, almost 2 months from my due date (that way travel won't be as bad) and my husband will more than likely come with me.

    I really hope that everything gets better for you!  Did you get my last PM?

    Married 2007
    DS - 5/2010
    DD - 6-2013
    TTC #3 - Cycle #9

  • Hey Avid! I did get your last pm :) I'm planning to respond to you asap. I'm currently doing a group project that I plan to finish tonight if my group can pull it together and stop being so stupid. I'll be able to pm you back tomorrow I hope as long as I can pull this together. If not, then by Saturday for sure!!  :D
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