2nd Trimester

Does anyone hate telling people

that you're pregnant?  I've just started telling people and I absolutely hate doing it!  I feel really awkward and just don't know what to say afterwards.  And, we've gotten some of the lovely, "were you trying?" questions. (My husband and I are in our 30s, been married over 3 years, not sure why it matters to them.)  I've only told a handful of friends and am dreading telling others.  Any tips?

Re: Does anyone hate telling people

  • I hate telling work people. I work in a big lab. And I told on facebook - there are several work people I'm friends with on there. So mostly the word has trickled. But it's like everyday someone else asks me if I'm pg. I'm not going to just go up to people I don't talk to often (like people on different shifts where it's like "hi and bye") and just say "I'm pregnant!". That's just weird.

    So no advice. But I can relate. And I HATE "Were you trying?" What? Who cares? Do they want to know if it was unplanned or are they trying to get me to say how long we tried? That just makes an awkward situation...

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  • I don't really like saying it either.  Just b/c it feels very personal.  Like saying "I have a yeast infection."  I prefer to say something generic like "we're expecting."  Or I'll mention something about my "condition" and pat my belly.  I'm getting more used to it though.  It just kind of depends on the context.
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  • Somewhat impersonal, but I don't talk to anybody outside of work anyways...so I just sent an email out to my team and people around the office I know.  After that...word spreads quickly without me saying a thing haha which is fine by me!

    Telling my family and close friends was fun though, and yes, we did all that in person :)

  • I understand.  I'm 17 weeks and we have only begun to tell people.  I just told my boss at 15 weeks and a couple of people at work as well.  I'm not quite sure why I'm making a big deal of it, but I am.  Hopefully it gets easier as time passes.  My bump isn't jump out at you obvious, but if you look you'll see something! 
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  • when we found out i was preggers.. and it was confirmed with the doc.. thats when we decided to tell only our parents and siblings.. i didnt want everyone knowing right away...

    i told one friend.... and when i went back to work, everyone knew.. i was a lttle upset.. but eh.. everyone loves to talk about pregnant woman.. it was even told to my boss! i had the biggest fit ever! my place of employment is pretty small, so i told everyone off... for the simple fact that its NO ONE's business to tell my boss, but my own...

    i also got the "were you trying" question.. even the "are you going to keep it" question...

    my only tip, is to be careful who you tell.. esp if you dont want others knowing just yet.. and if that be true, let it be known... 

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  • I hate telling ppl too. :-/ sucks to admit that but I just tink ppl say the dumbest things sometimes. If you come up with any good ways of dealing with it let me know.
  • at least you dont have to deal with people asking you was it natural or did you use fertility drugs? ALways a fun conversation to have.
  • Oh my gosh -- totally in the same boat. It's awkward. It's like telling people, "Yep, we've been having a lot of sex lately"... And yes, I literally got 10, "Were you trying?" questions. We are the same age as you and we weren't broadcasting that we were trying (none of anyone's business) so I guess they were just surprised. I've decided that if I was 17 and single, maybe folks would be less inclined to ask such a question...
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  • Thanks everyone for the great responses -- so reassuring to know that I'm not crazy!  I think I was just so taken aback when some of my really good friends asked such stupid questions.  I can't imagine why people care if we were trying for 1 day or 5 years or if we had fertility treatments, yada yada yada.  Is my baby suddenly less awesome for any of those reasons? No.
  • I sent an e-mail to my coworkers saying, "DH and I have decided to start a family and our first is due April 21."
  • I've always felt like telling people you're pregnant is a very awkward thing to bring up in a conversation. Sometimes you just end up blurting it out like, 'hey by the way i'm pregnant'. 

    I never gave it much thought before I was pregnant but now I HATE the "were you trying" question. I feel like it's a very personal question. If you weren't trying what are they expecting you to say, "nope we just got really drunk one night and things got out of control"????  And at that point what difference does it make how the baby got there.

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  • I hate when people ask if we were trying. Maybe I am being immature about it but asking "were you trying" = " were you purposely having unprotected sex with your husband" and talking about my sex life is something I do with a very select group of people.


     

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