Good morning and wedding question...

clooney81

My best friend asked me to be in her wedding next fall.  She just got engaged a couple of weeks ago.  Well, over the weekend I found out she's changed her mind and is getting married THREE days before my due date in August.  I realize I'm really early on and am petrified something might happen, but I still am trying to figure out how to handle this one.  We weren't planning on telling anyone for awhile but I'm not sure if the right thing to do is to tell her now so that she can figure out if she wants me in it or not?

PurpleK26

If she's your best friend, I'd go ahead and tell her and trust her to keep the secret. You never know, she might even change the date of her wedding if it's that important to her to make sure she'll have you in it...and not in labor on her wedding day!

clooney81

PurpleK26:

If she's your best friend, I'd go ahead and tell her and trust her to keep the secret. You never know, she might even change the date of her wedding if it's that important to her to make sure she'll have you in it...and not in labor on her wedding day!

Thanks! I feel really bad.  I would never expect her to change her date, I'm just wondering if maybe I can be involved but maybe not be up there in case my water breaks mid ceremony or something. Ugh.  I liked the fall idea better!!!

megdrew1218

This is asked on these boards frequently. I think you should tell her, and swear her to secrecy. That way she can kind of plan better. Maybe if the date is set in stone, you could offer to be a personal attendant or something?

abs711

I would say ask for a different role and explain why.  I am in a wedding 2 months before my due date and I can't tell you what a pain in the *ss it is.  I love my friend and I so want to be there for her.  But there were dress issues, there will be shoe issues, there are money issues, travel issues (I am in SC and she is in NY and I will be 30 weeks), logistic issues (at 30 weeks I have to go stand on a beach in NY in February for pics).  I wish I didn't have a significant role.  JMO!  I would hate to see you buy a dress and then not be able to be there because your in the hospital.  I would just explain and if she is a true friend she will understand.  I sure wish I did.  I had accepted after my second loss and didn't think I could be this PG at her wedding but we got pg sooner then we thought.