Are all 3 year olds lying liars full of lies? Or just mine?

CubbyMama

Someone flipped a switch on my darling child and turned her into a fibmeister.  Yesterday, she tried to shoplift a Sleeping Beauty cell phone from Big Lots and told me it was "nowhere" when it was clearly sticking out of her pants pocket; today, she threw her sandwich on the floor (in plain sight, mind you) and told me she "ate it all gone."  Clearly, she is no criminal mastermind, so it's not like she's getting away with anything, but it's happening more and more frequently just in the past few days. 

I'm going to look for some picture books that teach about telling the truth, but other than that, I'm not sure what else to do. 

How do you handle lying at this age?

Zenya

I have read that lying at this age is more like.. wishful reality.  She is just telling you what she wants. Not what she really knows is true?  IDK if that's true but apparently the whole 'lying' thing is a concept for an older child.

So when DS lies I rephrase it to confirm that he's just pretending.  And he'll agree that that's what he's doing. 

 He doesn't do it a whole lot though (YET!).

femmegem

Ditto Zenya.

JenniC1135

One of mine does, the other does not.  Lots of telling Daddy, "Mommy said I can ______," when Mommy certainly said no such thing.  And hiding things in his clothes, saying he didn't punch his brother in the face when we just saw him do it, etc.  Frustrating to say the least.  I don't have any advice though.

CubbyMama

Yeah, I think part of it is that she doesn't understand what "lying" means or why it's a problem, so I'm trying to explain that to her and do little role plays (I put the remote control behind my back and then say, "I don't have the remote!  Am I lying or telling the truth?")  Not sure if that'll help, but we'll see!

CTFandme

I saw the title of this post, but didn't read it because my almost 3 year old really doesn't lie...yet.  Then, 5 minutes later as I'm in the nursery getting dd dressed, I hear my very truthful, almost 3 year old say to his dad from the bathtub, don't do that, mom already washed me.  And there you have it.   

hopefulmom

So far my DS has not done that...but doesn't have a  yournger sibling.  Maybe it is when they are trying to get attention?   I did read that if you actually SAW them do something...don't ask if they did it (because clearly you know they did and you are setting them up to lie if they think they will get into trouble).  I guess you would just say, I saw you throw your food on the floor.  Why did you do that?  Hopefully she won't say..."I didn't" and say "I didn't want it"...in which you can tell her to tell you she doesn't want it and you will take care of it or she can put it on the counter.  Hopefully I don't go through that.  I never had to with my other kids.

Ciarrai

Yup.  DD#1 has totally started it and it drives me nuts.  She tells me straight out that she's going to tell DH that I said she could have a treat when I tell her she can't.  She tells me that DD#2 said she wants to watch XXX or wants to go outside or whatever with DD#2 standing there telling me she doesn't or telling me something totally different.  It's gotten really really bad in the last month or two.  I keep hoping it's a phase she's going through.  She definitely knows she's lying, though.  She knows at least that she's not telling the truth and that it's wrong.  You can tell in how she says it and how she does it.  It's in this spiteful, prove-me-wrong tone rather than her usual drama queen tone.  I don't know how to describe it, but she definitely knows she's not telling the truth or even telling what she wants to be the truth.  She knows she's doing something wrong anyway.  Doesn't stop her, but she does know it.

kristalandphil

I have no brilliant advice either but we are in the same boat! I don't post often but this hits close to home for me! It seems like every time I turn around my almost 3 yr. old DS is lying about something or rolling something up in his shirt or hiding it behind his back. I suppose the good thing is that he is not a mastermind at it and it is REALLY obvious when he is doing/has something he is not supposed to!

hikerbeth

I've heard that lying before age 4 is a sign of intelligence!!  You've got a genius on your hands

kertybird

DD told her forst lie today!  She told me that "Daddy said I could get down and have apple juice"  Too bad DH was standing right in front of me when he told her 2 seconds before that she had to sit there finish her lunch and no more apple juice!  Stinker