My introduction - a little late
I have been posting here and there over the last couple of weeks and I realized that I never really introduced myself and told about my situation at all here. So, here goes.
I am a Mom of 3, my oldest son will be 14 y/o next month, my daughter turned 3 y/o yesterday and my youngest son is 19mths.
My oldest son I had when I was 20 y/o. I was not married, though his Dad and I did live together. We split up when my DS was 2 y/o and made a promise to each other that we would always try to have a good relationship for the sake of our son and we have stuck by that. We have never gone to court over custody or anything, I have never asked for child support from him. We have 50/50 custody, sort of. When DS was younger things were much more scheduled, but now that he is older and has sports and school and everything, he just kind of goes here and there between houses. It works great for us. I am very fortunate that I have a great friendship with BD and his wife. They now have 3 children together and they are just really good people. I actually threw BD's wife's baby shower when they were expecting their oldest DD. Yes, I know that mine is not a normal situation, but it works great for us.
My 2 youngest children are with my soon to be ex-husband. We have been separated since June 2009. We are trying hard to work together and do things for the sake of the kids, but I just don't foresee things going as smoothly as they did with DS#1's Dad and anticpate having to take him to court soon for custody issues, because he is kind of making my life hell regarding the holidays and such. I'm hoping that he will eventually grow up and realize that our kids come first, but we'll see.
I myself come from a broken home, my Dad just divorced wife #3 and my Mom is on husband #3 (though we think this one might stick 
) I always said that because of what I saw my parents go through that I would never put my own kids through that, but well, things don't always go how we want them to. I just hope to keep life for my kids as normal as possible and just do the best that I can as their Mom. Thanks for reading.
Kelly Monaghan's 5K - 5/15/11 - 3rd Place in AG
Walk the Talk 5K - 5/18/11 - 31:12 PR
Ridley Run 3.1 - 4/14/12 - 1st race of the year, 32:45
Re: My introduction - a little late
Welcome. It sounds like you have a great relationship worked out with BD1. Mine with the Practice Husband is generally good in a similar way. We did have a CO but it was for practical purposes, like school enrollment. We didn't live near each other so our visitation involved flight arrangements, etc. We'd call when we needed to speak, and were on friendly terms. We see each other and are on friendly terms. We attend birthdays, funerals and eventually we'll attend weddings as well. We're civil, even friendly -- as long as his wife isn't around. He has to ignore me when she's around. To quote him "I have to live with her" - and she despises the ground I slither on because I had a relationship and kids with him and therefore there's a part of him that isn't hers, and a history that isn't hers to claim. That and I'm an anus-female dog. The funny thing is that this is a woman with four kids with two prior husbands by the time she was 25 and was pregnant with another man's child when she moved in with him. Talk about a piece of her he'll never be able to fully claim. :gnort) He's told me about his health, his history, his band, things going on with him... It works for us.
I hope that BD2 and you can eventually work together for the sake of your kids. Parental acrimony only leads to alienation, confused kids and emotional damage. I hope for your kids' sake you two can work things out amicably.
Good luck and welcome.