2nd Trimester

I've never been so hurt!!! (long)

A little history..... DH and I dated for three years before we were married. About a year into our relationship we had a short, mutual split, 2 months, maybe (so we're talking 3 1/2 years ago) During that split I saw someone else for approx 2 weeks. One of those "what was I thinking" kind of things. DH and I soon realized that we were meant to be together, stopped fighting it and have lived happily ever after since. We never even mention the split. It was so insignificant and didn't matter then, doesn't matter now. It's like it never even happened.

Fast forward..... DH's bff and my bff have now begun to date. (BAD IDEA!) During a date one night about a week ago DH's bff asks my bff if....... wait for it........ you aren't going to believe this............. he asks if.............."I have cheated on DH again!!!!!" And then says "How is DH sure that the baby is his...... he should think about a paternity test!!!!!!"  Then last night he asks her these questions again. Asking if she is sure I wouldn't do something like that. She called and told me this morning.

ARE YOU KIDDING ME??????????? I am so hurt by this. DH's bff isn't some punk kid. They have been friends since middle school.... over 20 years. We hang out with him almost every weekend and I valuED him as a close friend of mine. We've gone a multiple vacations with him and his family. I just can't believe this is what he thinks of me. Who knows who else he has expressed his concerns with. We've got a huge group of close friends... now I wonder if they all think I should be wearing a Scarlett Letter. This is just unbelieveable.

 

Thanks for letting me air my Soap Opera. I've usually got a calm, peaceful life... but since learning of this... I'm distraught!Crying

 

 

 

[<b>edited by:</b> DANIELLE LORRAINE at 9:34 AM (GMT -6) on Tue, Nov 17 2009]
Up date: DH says he doesn't know where his bff is getting this from. Says he's never mentioned it to anyone... except for 3 1/2 years ago when we were split. DH says he actually forgot all about it. He is calling his and asking what's up. If he had concerns about OUR relationship... he should have come to us or mind his own life. So we're getting to the bottom of this dramma.
Also... I spoke to my bff again and she thinks the reason he asked her about all of this is because she knows me better than anyone and he thought she might know something DH doesn't. WHAT???? He is my husband.... he knows everything!

I'm so over dramma already and this has only been going on for 30 minutes... I dont' know how some people life like this everyday. I want my quiet little boring life back.

 

Re: I've never been so hurt!!! (long)

  • Ok, this is the sort of thing your friend should have never told you. She should have told him to STFU but what does telling you accomplish?
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  • easier said than done but I wouldn't let him get to you. You were split at the time... that's not cheating. I personally would talk to my DH about it & have him talk wtih his friend though.
    "Dear Lord, I would have loved to have held my babies on my lap and tell them about you, but since I didn't get the chance, would you please hold them on your lap and tell them about me?" DD 9/22/03 Our little sassypants! DS 4/10/10 My little man is growing so fast
  • You should sit down with DH and talk to him.  Pay no attention to what others think.  If they're you're true friends, they won't think or talk like that.  And you never cheated, you guys were split, correct???  He has no business asking if you're cheated again...you never cheated to begin with.  DH is the only one you should be worried about.  If he trusts you then that's all that matters.
  • I hope your best friend stood up to the dbag! The past is the past, and what you did isn't even cheating anyway. If you two are in love and happy together you have nothing to prove to anyone else. Just focus on your family and try not to let other people's negativity get the best of you. I know that can be hard, but it's all that matters at the end of the day!
  • I would want to know! If Dh told him this then that is a lie and this guy is spreading the lie, to your bff and who knows who else. I would confront DH, but that's just me. I am a big liar hater if you want to call me that. Good luck with the early holiday drama.
  • imageIrishBrideND:
    Ok, this is the sort of thing your friend should have never told you. She should have told him to STFU but what does telling you accomplish?

    This!  If your friend is going to keep dating him, bounderies need to be set now!  This is just going to get ugly...

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  • imagewankle1234:
    I would want to know! If Dh told him this then that is a lie and this guy is spreading the lie, to your bff and who knows who else. I would confront DH, but that's just me. I am a big liar hater if you want to call me that. Good luck with the early holiday drama.

     

    I agree.  My first thought was, "what did her DH tell this guy back then when it happened".  Most likely, your DH wasn't thrilled with you dating the other guy and explained it as "cheating" to his buddy and this buddy has just thought that ever since.

  • Ok I can understand wanting to know if you think Dh would lie about something like that. I didn't think of it from that angle.
  • imagewachs:
    easier said than done but I wouldn't let him get to you. You were split at the time... that's not cheating. I personally would talk to my DH about it & have him talk wtih his friend though.

    This.  Tell your DH what's going on and how much it bothers you.

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  • WOW, is all I can say. omg.
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  • I keep picturing Ross from friends yelling, "We were on a break!"

    But seriously, you did nothing wrong and it might be good to have DH talk to him about this.

  • imagePumpkin30:

    I keep picturing Ross from friends yelling, "We were on a break!"

    But seriously, you did nothing wrong and it might be good to have DH talk to him about this.

     

     

    HAHAHA I said that I feel like Ross to DH this morning!!!! So funny!

  • imageIrishBrideND:
    Ok, this is the sort of thing your friend should have never told you. She should have told him to STFU but what does telling you accomplish?

    This.  Why in the world would she share that with you?

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  • This  is the most hurtful thing that has ever happened to you. You know what is right, why do you care what he says? I would just brush it off.
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