Attachment Parenting

AP gift basket

A friend of mine is newly pregnant, and throughout my pregnancy, she was really on-board with a lot of AP things. I would like to put together a basket for her shower (so I have a lot of time to think about this) and so far, I am thinking that I will have my mom make her a scandi mei tai, to put in there, some cloth diapers, maybe the AP book my Sears. Is there anything else that would really go well with the theme that you can think of?
image

Re: AP gift basket

  • Maybe some nice cloth wipes to go with the diapers or some laundry detergent?
  • I have Sears, Baby Book, which I love...I don't have the AP one but I think the Baby Book covers that and much more. 
    imageBaby Birthday Ticker TickerBaby Birthday Ticker Ticker Doriimage
    "Just keep swimming, just keep swimming..."
  • Loading the player...
  • Breastfeeding supplies--maybe some nice breast pads and nipple cream.
  • Baby massage DVD and baby massage oil
  • A book on homemade baby food, and a stretchy wrap. I love my MT, but I also loved how snuggly my little guy was in our stretchy. I also love my wool breast pads...I got 2 pairs, and wear them almost every day. They're awesome and I swear they saved my nipples. Include some lanolin soap to wash them (you can go to www.cottonbabies.com to get both).
  • I love the idea of giving a few books on parenting.  HBOTB & The Baby Book are both great.  What about a BFing book?  I really liked So That's What They're There For.

    Does your friend want to CD?  If she does then include the diapers or maybe a GC for part of a trial program.  If not then I wouldn't include the diapers, maybe just some pretty burp cloths or something.  CDs can be spendy so I wouldn't want to spend the $$ if she wasn't into it.

    Love the sling idea!  You might even find a Moby knock-off instead if you think she would like that more.

    But the BEST gift people gave us were meals after she came.  It was so nice to not have to think about cooking a meal each night.

    image
  • imageHippinski:

    I love the idea of giving a few books on parenting.  HBOTB & The Baby Book are both great.  What about a BFing book?  I really liked So That's What They're There For.

    Does your friend want to CD?  If she does then include the diapers or maybe a GC for part of a trial program.  If not then I wouldn't include the diapers, maybe just some pretty burp cloths or something.  CDs can be spendy so I wouldn't want to spend the $$ if she wasn't into it.

    Love the sling idea!  You might even find a Moby knock-off instead if you think she would like that more.

    But the BEST gift people gave us were meals after she came.  It was so nice to not have to think about cooking a meal each night.

    All of this.....and not a single thing is really "AP". You are just making a basket for a new mom. Stop putting labels on what's natural.

  • imagemandyclaire579:
    imageHippinski:

    I love the idea of giving a few books on parenting.  HBOTB & The Baby Book are both great.  What about a BFing book?  I really liked So That's What They're There For.

    Does your friend want to CD?  If she does then include the diapers or maybe a GC for part of a trial program.  If not then I wouldn't include the diapers, maybe just some pretty burp cloths or something.  CDs can be spendy so I wouldn't want to spend the $$ if she wasn't into it.

    Love the sling idea!  You might even find a Moby knock-off instead if you think she would like that more.

    But the BEST gift people gave us were meals after she came.  It was so nice to not have to think about cooking a meal each night.

    All of this.....and not a single thing is really "AP". You are just making a basket for a new mom. Stop putting labels on what's natural.

    Whoa! Where did that come from?   The OP said that her friend was interested in AP so that's what inspired the basket.  I happened to mention the things that I know could work for anyone but they still tend to be AP minded.

    image
  • imageHippinski:
    imagemandyclaire579:
    imageHippinski:

    I love the idea of giving a few books on parenting.  HBOTB & The Baby Book are both great.  What about a BFing book?  I really liked So That's What They're There For.

    Does your friend want to CD?  If she does then include the diapers or maybe a GC for part of a trial program.  If not then I wouldn't include the diapers, maybe just some pretty burp cloths or something.  CDs can be spendy so I wouldn't want to spend the $$ if she wasn't into it.

    Love the sling idea!  You might even find a Moby knock-off instead if you think she would like that more.

    But the BEST gift people gave us were meals after she came.  It was so nice to not have to think about cooking a meal each night.

    All of this.....and not a single thing is really "AP". You are just making a basket for a new mom. Stop putting labels on what's natural.

    Whoa! Where did that come from?   The OP said that her friend was interested in AP so that's what inspired the basket.  I happened to mention the things that I know could work for anyone but they still tend to be AP minded.

    I'm sorry, it wasn't directed at your reply. I liked what you were suggesting. I just don't like that the basket is suddenly "AP" when everything included is something most moms have. I don't know a mom who didn't register for boob cream, pads, or some type of carrier. The only "AP" thing I saw in there was the Sears book so how is it an AP basket and not just a new mom one? I guess I do get irked that every mom out there is practicing AP unless they are completely ignorant mothers, but it's still some kind of club on here. I'm not trying to be offensive at all. I do practice AP, but so does every other mom I know. Does that make sense?

  • imagemandyclaire579:

    I guess I do get irked that every mom out there is practicing AP unless they are completely ignorant mothers, but it's still some kind of club on here. I'm not trying to be offensive at all. I do practice AP, but so does every other mom I know. Does that make sense?

    I think the reason the OP asked about an AP New Mom Basket is because her friend is interested in AP.  I think the telling thing isn't what is in the basket and more about what's left out.  There isn't mention of a pacifier or bottles.  Those things aren't bad but lots of new baby/mom baskets will have them and they weren't mentioned at all.  Lots of people outside the AP community would include a Babywise Book and give it saying that 'every new mother has to have this!', but there is no way anyone I know who practices AP would ever consider this a good gift...unless the people they were giving it to had a wood stove or a fireplace and needed starter paper.

    And I don't think anyone has implied that people are ignorant if they don't do AP.  There are plenty of people who don't want to co-sleep, babywear or bf.  And there are plenty of moms who do some or all of those things and don't consider themselves AP at all.

    AP is a mind set...it's not a check list.  And while I do think more people parent in an AP/Natural Parenting type way there are plenty of people who don't.  There are plenty of moms/parents who prop a bottle for a baby or pop a pacifier in their mouth at the first sign of a fuss.  Doesn't make them a bad parent...it's just a different style of parenting then what my family chose.  Another example would be using CIO as a form of sleep training...especially w/o trying a more gentle approach.  Plenty of parents do that and it's totally not in the AP style.

    I also think that a lot of people freak out and get all defensive about their parenting when talking to someone who parents differently.  I know that there are AP moms who get frustrated when the huge CIO proponents tell people that they did CIO to give their child the 'gift of sleep'. Vice versa parents who did chose to use CIO could feel judged if an AP mom said that they co-sleep and won't sleep train.  The judgement train, or feelings of being judged, for sure goes both ways.

    I'm not trying to be offensive either.  I just get sick of being told that this board/AP in general makes people feel like AP is a club.  It's not.  It's not a check list and I think most people on this board are pretty darn helpful and answer lots of questions without being snarky and biitchy...unlike some other boards where God forbid you ask a question and the gangs jump because they didn't like the way it was worded.

    image
  • Whoa.  Sorry that got so long.
    image
  • This isn't strictly AP, but I would put in a book she could read with/to the baby. Maybe a BPA-free baby food storage thingy (like ice cube trays, but covered)?

    Lilypie First Birthday tickers Lilypie Third Birthday tickers Keshias Birthday 2012 046edit
  • imageHippinski:

    imagemandyclaire579:

    I guess I do get irked that every mom out there is practicing AP unless they are completely ignorant mothers, but it's still some kind of club on here. I'm not trying to be offensive at all. I do practice AP, but so does every other mom I know. Does that make sense?

    I think the reason the OP asked about an AP New Mom Basket is because her friend is interested in AP.  I think the telling thing isn't what is in the basket and more about what's left out.  There isn't mention of a pacifier or bottles.  Those things aren't bad but lots of new baby/mom baskets will have them and they weren't mentioned at all.  Lots of people outside the AP community would include a Babywise Book and give it saying that 'every new mother has to have this!', but there is no way anyone I know who practices AP would ever consider this a good gift...unless the people they were giving it to had a wood stove or a fireplace and needed starter paper.

    And I don't think anyone has implied that people are ignorant if they don't do AP.  There are plenty of people who don't want to co-sleep, babywear or bf.  And there are plenty of moms who do some or all of those things and don't consider themselves AP at all.

    AP is a mind set...it's not a check list.  And while I do think more people parent in an AP/Natural Parenting type way there are plenty of people who don't.  There are plenty of moms/parents who prop a bottle for a baby or pop a pacifier in their mouth at the first sign of a fuss.  Doesn't make them a bad parent...it's just a different style of parenting then what my family chose.  Another example would be using CIO as a form of sleep training...especially w/o trying a more gentle approach.  Plenty of parents do that and it's totally not in the AP style.

    I also think that a lot of people freak out and get all defensive about their parenting when talking to someone who parents differently.  I know that there are AP moms who get frustrated when the huge CIO proponents tell people that they did CIO to give their child the 'gift of sleep'. Vice versa parents who did chose to use CIO could feel judged if an AP mom said that they co-sleep and won't sleep train.  The judgement train, or feelings of being judged, for sure goes both ways.

    I'm not trying to be offensive either.  I just get sick of being told that this board/AP in general makes people feel like AP is a club.  It's not.  It's not a check list and I think most people on this board are pretty darn helpful and answer lots of questions without being snarky and biitchy...unlike some other boards where God forbid you ask a question and the gangs jump because they didn't like the way it was worded.

    Very well said

  • imagefredalina:

    And... that's fine.  That's their parenting style and if it works for them, i suppose that's fine.  But those of us here don't share that type of parenting.  We share a type of parenting that works for us instead, and that we believe is best for our kids.

    I don't think that it is fair to say that you 'suppose' it is fine. It is their child and their life and of course it is fine for them. They are not abusing their child, they are just choosing to do things differently than you or I would. 

    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • imagefredalina:
    imageandrea922:
    imagefredalina:

    And... that's fine.  That's their parenting style and if it works for them, i suppose that's fine.  But those of us here don't share that type of parenting.  We share a type of parenting that works for us instead, and that we believe is best for our kids.

    I don't think that it is fair to say that you 'suppose' it is fine. It is their child and their life and of course it is fine for them. They are not abusing their child, they are just choosing to do things differently than you or I would. 

    Hyper-sensitive much?

    Not at all. I just think it is a shady thing to say. I think judging other parents for how they raise THEIR child is wrong. And you have admitted you do it, so I don't actually know why this surprises me. You raise your child and let others raise theirs. Don't assume they are bad parents because they parent differently than you.

    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • I suppose there does seem to be some confusion sometimes between AP and eco-friendly, but I think that's only because a lot of APers tend to be "crunchier," no? Of course, that may be a gross generalization. But I think that's what I've noticed anecdotally.

    I also don't think it's surprising that people with similar beliefs like to "talk" to one another. It's true that you can talk about baby carriers and other things on boards other than just this one, but one tends to get more specified responses about baby-wearing or, for older children, gentle discipline on this board.

    I guess I'm not sure that I agree with the idea that ALL mothers are practicing AP. Some examples of things I've seen/heard would be a 3 month old with a propped bottle while her parents ate at a restaurant, a pregnant mom seeing me wearing the Ergo who said she didn't think she'd want "one of those," etc. I don't know. Those are just two random things, but they lead me to believe not everyone is practicing AP - be it hard core or "lite."

  • imagefredalina:
    imageandrea922:
    imagefredalina:
    imageandrea922:
    imagefredalina:

    And... that's fine.  That's their parenting style and if it works for them, i suppose that's fine.  But those of us here don't share that type of parenting.  We share a type of parenting that works for us instead, and that we believe is best for our kids.

    I don't think that it is fair to say that you 'suppose' it is fine. It is their child and their life and of course it is fine for them. They are not abusing their child, they are just choosing to do things differently than you or I would. 

    Hyper-sensitive much?

    Not at all. I just think it is a shady thing to say. I think judging other parents for how they raise THEIR child is wrong. And you have admitted you do it, so I don't actually know why this surprises me. You raise your child and let others raise theirs. Don't assume they are bad parents because they parent differently than you.

    Calling me out because i used the phrase "i suppose" is hypersensitive.  It's a common part of my speech pattern, for crying out loud.

    But yeah, i judge some parents.  i'm raising another parent's child because they are incapable of parenting.  i tend to think babies deserve the best as a result.

    i don't judge everyone.  If someone wants to put the baby in a bouncer instead of holding her, "i suppose that's fine."  (Meanwhile, they don't care about my approval, so why are you so concerned about it?  MYOB).  i *judge* those who do certain things.  My biggest non-abuse judgment is those who CIO before AT LEAST 4, preferably 6 months.  (And i personally would commit to never doing it before 1 year, and even then i seriously doubt that i would, but i don't *judge* those who do at 8 months.)

    i don't understand why people have to come here, to a group that definition is people who don't do those things because they believe their parenting style is best, and give us crap for it.  Stop telling us to parent our kids and let others parent theirs.  Do the same.  Go away and parent your child and stop worrying about what we think.

    And you've now hijacked someone's well-meaning post asking for suggestions for a gift basket for a friend that people of the AP mindset would enjoy, and twisted it around for your own soapbox.  Happy?

    Ironically, you know nothing about me or how I parent. And since I am on this board you would assume I parent like you, correct? This would   be correct. I define myself as someone who practices AP. I just don't believe that criticizing other parenting styles is part of APing. If you do then I think that is sad. I wouldn't ever say the way someone parents is wrong just because it doesn't match with how I want to raise my child. I think that is judgemental and sad. 

    Get off your high horse and stop thinking that just because I don't agree with you being all judgey means that I don't believe in and agree with AP - for me and for my child.

    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • imageandrea922:

    Get off your high horse and stop thinking that just because I don't agree with you being all judgey means that I don't believe in and agree with AP - for me and for my child.

    Oh, get a grip. Fred's one of the least judgmental people on the Nest. Stop trying to make a mountain out of a molehill. You grossly misinterpreted what Fred was trying to say and are jumping down her throat for it. You've wrongly assumed (based on ONE word in ONE of her sentences) that she was being judgmental, which is hardly the case here.

    Get over yourself.

    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • imageMrs_Liberto:
    imageandrea922:

    Get off your high horse and stop thinking that just because I don't agree with you being all judgey means that I don't believe in and agree with AP - for me and for my child.

    Oh, get a grip. Fred's one of the least judgmental people on the Nest. Stop trying to make a mountain out of a molehill. You grossly misinterpreted what Fred was trying to say and are jumping down her throat for it. You've wrongly assumed (based on ONE word in ONE of her sentences) that she was being judgmental, which is hardly the case here.

    Get over yourself.

    If you reread what she wrote and my reply you would see that this is not in response to the word 'suppose' but in fact in response to the fact that she was assuming I am not AP and was telling me to leave the board. She herself admitted in a post above that she judges people, including her own sister.

    I don't need to get over myself, but thanks for the advice.

    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • Yes.  Exactly.

    I judge and I know people judge me.  It is life.

    ETA: ARG, I can't "quote."  This was in response to fredalina's sensible opinion.  

  • We all judge, it's human nature.  What we do with that judgement is what defines us. 

    An AP gift basket I would have loved.  I received 2 copies of Babywise and Dr Ferber's book.  I read them and was sorry I wasted my time.  I should have been reading Twilight or something I would have enjoyed. 

    Great gift idea.

  • And a gift idea - fluffy slippers or socks/something cozy.  

    I spent the 1st 6 weeks on various beds and couches with DD, and I am so happy that I can look back on that time and remember feeling safe, connected, and peaceful with DD all day every day.  It was as much for me as it was for her.

    So something in the gift basket to promote relaxation for mom.  I think it is key to be able to stop thinking about the outside world, stop worrying about the future, and live in the moment for the first 6 weeks.  Wood wick soy candle? A coupon for some sort of food - catering/delivery paid for one dinner, they just have to call and place order which ever night they want it.  Shower gel, shampoo, etc?  

    I received a gift basket with a Burt's Bees travel pack of lotions, soaps, and shampoos.  I enjoyed using something new during the first few months .  My showers were my only alone time to relax and get refreshed.  I still associate specific products' scents with that time in my life.  So something for Mom - It is important to make yourself comfortable and relaxed during the first 6 weeks.   

    and p.s. all natural, safe baby skin care products are expensive!  So, maybe a bottle of California Baby body wash or something similar.   

  • imagesusanmosley:

    and p.s. all natural, safe baby skin care products are expensive!  So, maybe a bottle of California Baby body wash, for example.   

    yes, I love the California Baby Super Sensitive Wash (man, is it expensive) and the Earth's Best Sunscreen (physical blockers as the active ingredients instead of the other chemical that react with baby's skin). both somewhat more expensive.

    nice idea, OP. I'm sure your friend will really like it!

This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards
"
"