What's the hardest time/age for SAH?

vernab

I'm going to be a SAHM in Dec when my LO is born.  I know it's not going to be easy and I know everyone has a hard time with different things but I was just wondering what has been the hardest part or age?  Was it the beginning, getting used to staying home or when they get older and sassy?  TIA

soontobemrs.S

For me the first year was the roughest. DD was colicky and had reflux and wasn't a good napper. Once she was able to walk and talk more it got to be so much fun. Challenging in different ways sure but she's on more of a routine now and she can play with other kids now so we get out and about a lot more. But I know many moms who had snuggly newborns that thought that was the easiest. It all depends I guess. Good luck to you!

vernab

soontobemrs.S:

For me the first year was the roughest. DD was colicky and had reflux and wasn't a good napper. Once she was able to walk and talk more it got to be so much fun. Challenging in different ways sure but she's on more of a routine now and she can play with other kids now so we get out and about a lot more. But I know many moms who had snuggly newborns that thought that was the easiest. It all depends I guess. Good luck to you!

Is it harder or easier with the second pregnancy being at home vs. working?  Thanks!

soontobemrs.S

Well I was lucky (if you can call it that)..the short version of the story is we had 2 losses, found out I had a clotting disorder, decided to adopt vs. ttc again, were chosen for a baby girl, I left my job on FMLA, baby never came home, adoption failed, found out we were pg again that same week, SURPRISE!, and so I decided to resign permanently to give the pg it's best shot. So I didn't work when I was pg with dd. Being pg with a toddler is exhausting to say the least!! But I am able to nap when she does, wouldn't be able to do that if I was working.

Stacyc625

Everything with kids is a trade off.

One thing gets easier, and two things get harder. That is what i have learned over the past year and a half.

sure they start sleeping through the night- then you have gas problems-

and then that clears up, and then you start dealing with solids (am i feeding enough?)

then you get that mastered- and then they start getting really mobile. Then you are teething hell- right after you get used to them being mobile.

And then it goes to hell- and they tear  your house apart all day long and chase your cat.

Then you fight with BF weaning and/or bottle weaning.

 

Andrewsgal

I seem to have the oldest one here so I will say that 3 is the hardest age so far. I have had several moms tell me 3 was the worst, but 4 is the best!

I love SAH and would not trade it for the world, but 3 is a hard age. Heck everything else was cake compared to this.

Being pregnant with a toddler was a lot easier for me than working pregnant.

charlatti

Stacyc625:

Everything with kids is a trade off.

One thing gets easier, and two things get harder. That is what i have learned over the past year and a half.

I'd agree with this. But for me, the hard things now are much more manageable than the hard things earlier on, mostly because I'm more confident in myself as a mom. As she grows, each new stage of development is more fun and more interesting than the previous stage, IMO. I'm not one of those moms who looks back wistfully at the tiny newborn months!

The first three months were really hard for us: reflux + colic = not fun. After that was finally managed, early mobility was tough for me. It was hard to figure out how to get even a second for myself when I couldn't leave her for a second without her getting in to something or screeching because I was gone. And sleep is a constant challenge for us.

yosmtegrl

soontobemrs.S:

For me the first year was the roughest. DD was colicky and had reflux and wasn't a good napper. Once she was able to walk and talk more it got to be so much fun. Challenging in different ways sure but she's on more of a routine now and she can play with other kids now so we get out and about a lot more. But I know many moms who had snuggly newborns that thought that was the easiest. It all depends I guess. Good luck to you!

 

Same here

gobigblue

yosmtegrl:

soontobemrs.S:

For me the first year was the roughest. DD was colicky and had reflux and wasn't a good napper. Once she was able to walk and talk more it got to be so much fun. Challenging in different ways sure but she's on more of a routine now and she can play with other kids now so we get out and about a lot more. But I know many moms who had snuggly newborns that thought that was the easiest. It all depends I guess. Good luck to you!

 

Same here

and here.  newborn phase is very hard if you have a fussy newborn.  i cried everyday for like 2 months.  when the routine set in around 3 mos, it got better.  then when DD could crawl and entertain herself, it got even better.  we're going thru a clingy phase right now, but it'll pass.  good luck!

soonergal

The hardest age for me was around 9-18 months.  At 9 months they aren't walking, but they want to be entertained.  At 18 months, they want to move around so much it's hard to go anywhere with them, like restaurants, shopping, etc. (shopping's okay if they like the stroller though).  Plus, they don't talk much at that age, so it's hard to know what they want.  I recommend teaching them to sign.  It helps a lot.

The stage I'm going through with DS#1 (2.5 years old) is pretty rough too.  He's funny and sweet and great almost all the time, but he's also sometimes disrespectful and stubborn.  I feel like I'm disciplining him constantly.  But the key is to realize (and I have to remind myself) that all of these are just stages.  There are great things and challenges to every age, but I'm so glad I'm around to witness them, regardless. 

I had a hard transition going from working (with no kids) to being a SAHM.  I think what helped was going to lots of playgroups, getting out every day, etc.  Also, I started working part time, and it was a lot to handle, and I kind of got some peace with my decision to SAH.  I now work very part time (like 2-5 hours a week), and that's just enough of a nice break.

HarrietNJMommy

I have 3, and the first year is always hard with each kid. None of my kids have been good sleepers in their first year, and they are so dependent on me since I exclusively BF, that it makes it extra hard. The sleep deprivation for me is the worst part - I do NOT function well with cut sleep.

It gets so much easier for me after the kids turn 1. 

HarrietNJMommy

Andrewsgal:

I seem to have the oldest one here so I will say that 3 is the hardest age so far. I have had several moms tell me 3 was the worst, but 4 is the best!

3 is definitely harder than 2, but it hasn't been that bad for me......

gatogrrl

For me, the hardest time was the beginning.  It's pretty intense and disorienting.  You have to take every chance to rest and give yourself a break.  I'm a perfectionist, so I had to deal with not knowing how to do anything quite "right" for a while.

After age one, DD has been so fun, with new expressions and accomplishments every day.  This is the very best time.  I am so glad I'm at home, not missing any of it!

2.red.heads

i feel like none of the phases have been that bad, but once DS was around 16 months or so, things seem to be a lot easier.  he's much more like a kid now (he's 2).  he eats and drinks normal things that adults do, he's great on his feet, i don't have to watch him as much (going up the stairs, that kind of thing). 

i've loved every stage. 

now when i add a 2nd baby, i think that's when it's going to get tough!  taking care of a busy body when your newborn is sleeping and all you want to do is catch some zzzz's too.

GL!  it's great!

Daisy77

Well, I have an older, sassy one right now, lol.  He just turned 4 on Saturday and I'm wondering where my sweet kid went! 

The toughest part had to be getting into a routine once DS arrived.  He was born in October '05 and I quit my job in August to help DD#1 transition to a new school.  I had my ducks in a row for about 5 minutes, then DS came along with acid reflux, gas, and eczema.  The first 6 months of his life the only way we could get him to sleep was to hold him and sit/bounce on an exercise ball.  One day I thought my arms were going to fall off so I laid him in his crib to cry and he conked out in 2 minutes.  From then on it was no problem to lay him down!  Lots of trial and error.

Otherwise, I *loved* the baby age.  They're cute and they don't really go anywhere.  The downside was the equipment they required: bottles, diapers, wipes, formula, toys, etc.  If I went somewhere by myself it just felt wrong to have only my purse to carry, lol.  With DD#2 at 21 months, she requires the diapers, wipe, a sippy and a snack..it all fits in a little backpack.  They are more fun at this age, but they experiment with all their new knowledge: the cabinet door opens!  How many pans can I drag out before mom catches me?  Or DS will leave the bathroom door open and DD#2 will march in and unroll the toilet paper.  Lately DD#2 has taken to stripping of all her clothes lickety split and then removing her diaper while I'm retrieving her clothing.  She thinks she's hilarious. Me, not so much! 

Each age has it's upsides and it's downsides.  Some days I don't know if I should laugh, cry, or scold.  Sometimes it's all 3!