why do people think....

naflmj · October 2009

I want their oppinions on our name choice, on how much I don't look pregnant and why don they think it's ok to touch my belly whenever they want??? We had a funeral today and if one more person touched my belly I think I was going to lose it! I think I would have had it not been a funeral.

Julia-Henry · October 2009

I can add to your list those people who think you want to hear the scary and obscure things that can go wrong during pg, the people who volunteer their unique parenting tips, and those who comment on your choice of drink ("don't you want decaf?" No, no I do not).

I think when we're pregnant, some people think anything goes. I am likely to kill at least one of those people before I hit 40 weeks.

Sorry you had such a rough day.

TCTF · October 2009

You know what really bothers me, more than anything else? Is when DH and his family lift my shirt without asking! I mean, rubbing my belly? Go for it. As long as I know the person, they can rub all they want, but DH seems to think I'm over-reacting over the whole shirt thing. He just says "we're excited! Everyone wants to see your belly! We just can't wait!" And that's nice and I know all of that, but it just bugs the hell out of me! If I lift my shirt, thats one thing, but I HATE it when someone else does it. And not once has any of his family (none of my family lives here and none of them have felt my pregnant belly yet, but my mom said that same thing DH did) has asked! His aunt is really touchy, and even before I was showing she came right over and lifted up my shirt and about four hands went to my belly is two seconds! Thank God I don't have any stretch marks, but still! So from now on, every time we go visit I wear a dress, and no one gets a chance to lift my shirt!

And the the whole "you're so tiny!!" Well thanks, but I don't feel tiny! I was 27 inches around before I was pregnant, and now I'm 39! I've been very lucky: no stretch marks, and all of my weight gain (only 13 pounds) has been right on my belly and my boobs, but I still feel very big. So what the heck am I supposed to say when someone says "you're so tiny!"?? "umm thanks but your wrong."??

TCTF · October 2009

Julia-Henry:

I can add to your list those people who think you want to hear the scary and obscure things that can go wrong during pg, the people who volunteer their unique parenting tips, and those who comment on your choice of drink ("don't you want decaf?" No, no I do not).

I think when we're pregnant, some people think anything goes. I am likely to kill at least one of those people before I hit 40 weeks.

Sorry you had such a rough day.

I agree with you, too! We were at DH's grandparents house a few hours from home, and his mom made coffee, and I asked for a cup. I hadn't had any coffee (which I am a die-hard coffee-lover! DH only lets me have decaf now.) in about two weeks, and DH glares at me and says really loudly, "No! You know you can't have regular coffee! You can have some sprite!" I couldn't believe it! Normally DH just kinda looks at me from the corner of his eye and says to only drink half a cup of decaf. He's never been so verbal about coffee. Well, fortunately his mom told him to butt out, and that one cup of coffee isn't going to hurt the baby, and that he drinks so much Mountain Dew that he has no room to talk. Yay for MIL that day!

ABColeslaw · October 2009

Amen to people randomly sharing horror stories! Why do they want to scare us? Why is that fun?

Also added to the list, my overly worried mother, who threatened to get on a plane and move back home because I was diagnosed with GD. Are you kidding me?

urbanwifey · October 2009

So true... why is it that being pregnant means you need 'Help' and I mean everything from advice to help lifting things to help making decisions.

EmmieB · October 2009

I'm of the opinion that if you would not engage in such behavior with a non-pg person (commenting on size/weight/diet, touching, LIFTING THE SHIRT) then it's NOT OK to do that with a pregnant woman.

Unfortunately I seem to be in the minority.

eyunger1 · October 2009

I definitely hear you about the "you don't even look pregnant!" Seriously? I know they're just being nice, or whatever, but I'm neurotic enough as it is without people telling me how SMALL I am! I have to keep reminding myself that the baby was the right size (even a bit large) on u/s last week. No one has weighed in anything but positive stuff for our name choice, so that's at least good. And lately no one has touched my belly (interesting that my friends and co-workers can respect my wishes about this, but my extended family cannot)....

naflmj · October 2009

Hollysmoffett:

Amen to people randomly sharing horror stories! Why do they want to scare us? Why is that fun?

Also added to the list, my overly worried mother, who threatened to get on a plane and move back home because I was diagnosed with GD. Are you kidding me?

]

oh yea, I got some horror stories too...because I want to know how much my pregnancy and deliverycould be:)

rchelone · October 2009

For that reason, we are not telling ANYONE we know our name choices. They'll find out after the baby is born! As for touching, I haven't had too many people touch me, just a couple coworkers and they all ask first - plus they're pretty close so I wouldn't mind too much.

naflmj · October 2009

rchelone:
For that reason, we are not telling ANYONE we know our name choices. They'll find out after the baby is born! As for touching, I haven't had too many people touch me, just a couple coworkers and they all ask first - plus they're pretty close so I wouldn't mind too much.

DH can't keep his mouth shut...I am not as worried about the name, I still love it even with the Grammy and Graham cracker comments so I guess thats a good sign. As for touching, if someone asked, Id say no...I am weird about my personal space.

nero1281 · October 2009

Can I add to this list?

It really bugs me when families that already have children say things like, "just wait".....or, "enjoy it now"....or whatever nightmare scenario is in store for me once I have the baby.

I am a realist. I KNOW I will have no time for myself, or sleep, or even a shower sometimes once this kid arrives. I'm an aunt to 10 nieces and nephews. I've seen how hard it's been for my sister-in-laws. I knew this going in. I don't need a reminder and I don't need people scaring mw any more than I already am!!!!

Masters219 · October 2009

I have a girl at work who bugs me everyday to show her my belly. I am not going to lift my shirt so she can see my over-inflated fat! Everyday I tell her no but she just keeps asking. Just amazes me.

shell0607 · October 2009

I don't mind when family or close friends touch my belly now, though it's always nice when they ask or hesitate. But I couldn't stand it when they would do it when I wasn't showing and was bloated. And the "you can't tell at all yet" wasn't nice when I felt gross and bloated... But now I get that, "OMG you're soo big, if I didn't know better I'd guess you were having twins." And "are you sure there is only one in there?" Yes I am sure and I am measuring right on track so I do not look more or less pregnant thatn I should.

adcffaa · October 2009

I know what you mean about the opinions on name chocie. When my fiance or I tell someone the names we've chosen they say that the names are too grown-up or mature for babies. Maybe it just me, but if I remember correctly babies grow up into adults... And as for the names being too mature or whatever, there are always nicknames if it really bugs them that much. (The names we chose are Ethan Maxwell for a boy and Trinity Lynn for a girl)