Anybody else not stoked w/ U/S results?

Athena5692

I'm only 15 weeks pregnant, and I already feel like a terrible parent!  I found out today that I'm having a girl.  I feel like I should be excited to know, but I really wanted a boy!  Between siblings having girls, having a great boy named picked out, and feeling like girls just bring that extra bit of drama with already being a handful, I feel a little bummed.

 Did anyone else have this happen to them?  I need to find a way to get excited again!

brooketarne

just be excited that you're having a healthy baby...gender shouldn't matter that much!

LadySprat

I personally didn't have that happen, but suggest that you look at the brighter more positive side...you've been blessed with a little princess!  I'm sure over the next few weeks or even days, you'll realize just how much your life is better with that little girl!

HTH

jksweets

I wasn't upset I was having a boy.  More along the lines that the little girl I'd been thinking about 50% of the time wasn't going to exist this pregnancy.  Does that make sense?  It wore off after about a day and I've been nothing but happy about my little man since.

I'm sure you are happy that it's a healthy baby, it will just take some time to accept it in your mind.

ilovemyprince

brooketarne:

just be excited that you're having a healthy baby...gender shouldn't matter that much!

 

This. It's one thing to be a little shocked, but UPSET? Your lucky your having a healthy baby....Boy or girl!

All_Planned

I agree with pp BUT if it makes you feel any better....15 weeks is pretty early and the u/s could be wrong.

I'd trust the u/s at the 24+ weeks...So it could still be a boy - Good Luck

chris27

When your baby girl looks up at your with those little eyes and grabs your finger....believe me....you won't care anymore.

My girls are a crazy mix of tomboy and girly. We don't have anymore drama than any of my friends with boys. If anything, their calmer.

carolinachica

I didn't have that reaction, but I certainly know people who have.  I wouldn't beat yourself up over it.

That said, I have a girl and she was the easiest baby ever.  Slept through the night at 8 weeks, barely cried.  Has had one temper tantrum EVER.  No drama, no crazy climbing or boundless boy energy either.  Seriously we barely had to babyproof with her.  

Boys are certainly great too, but if we find out we were having another daughter, I would be excited.  Girls are so much fun!!!!  Hope that helps you be a bit excited.  Oh, and the shopping with a girl is fabulous!

 

fabulistbride

I didn't have the exact same reaction, but I was expecting a boy, too. And when we learned it's a girl my mind raced to the difficult relationships mothers and daughters sometimes have later on. For now, I'm planning on enjoying her as much as possible when she's little and hoping to minimize the preteen and teen drama. I know my own relationship with my mom is strained at times, but I also know that she and I are much, much closer than she is with my brothers because of everything we've weathered. Maybe you can look forward to that special bond that you'll always share.

knedell

DH and I were convinced (along with most of our families) that this baby was a girl.  I told him the night before our sono that I would cry if it turned out to be a boy.  I was sort of kidding...

Anyway, as you can see from my siggy, we are having a boy and there is NO question about it!  At the actual u/s I was excited bc I was just watching him jump around a break dance on my cervix.  Once I got home I started thinking about it a little more and started to feel a little weird about it.  I think for me it was more of just having to switch my whole thought process about the baby - I would not get to buy this baby anything pink and we would never get pedicures together, etc.  We went shopping for a few sweet blue things and that helped me get into the whole boy mindset.  Ultimately I am so happy that we are having a healthy baby and the more time I have, the more excited I am about having a boy.  Just hang in there, you will be fine and I promise when she gets here, you will love her more than you ever felt possible! 

wifey type

i was a little bummed when i found out i was having a boy, since i already have one and was hoping for a girl this time. but when they called me a few days later to tell me my baby has a club foot and cysts on his brain i couldnt beleive that i even felt that way, now im just praying that my little boy is healthy.

SigmundsGirl

jksweets:

I wasn't upset I was having a boy.  More along the lines that the little girl I'd been thinking about 50% of the time wasn't going to exist this pregnancy.  Does that make sense?  It wore off after about a day and I've been nothing but happy about my little man since.

I'm sure you are happy that it's a healthy baby, it will just take some time to accept it in your mind.

This was me exactly. And DH wanted a little girl. But when he realized all of the things the tech was looking for, cleft palate and so on, he was just relieved (and keeps praying) that our little boy is healthy.

Lola'sDogMom

I was bummed for about a week+ when I found out LO was a boy. I really wanted a little girl. But now, 5 weeks later, I can't imagine anything other than my little boy. Give it some time, you may come around.

SapphyrEyes

I wanted another boy.  I was disappointed at the U/S, but she is healthy and I have NO complaints about that at all.  I'm doing things that are making me excited for her to arrive and the disappointment only lasted a couple days.  Start thinking of things or things to get for her that you're excited about.  The disappointment is common if you were really wanting something different but it goes away.

uc_im_smiling

When I first found out I was pregenant, I told everyone it didn't matter what I was having as long as my baby was healthy.  Secretly I was hoping for a girl.  This week I found out I was having a boy, and I am ecstatic.  I have realized with all of the complications that pregnacy can have,  a healthy baby is all I could and will ask for. 

lnoska

I SSSSSSOOOO wanted another girl and found out it is a boy this week.  I cried so I totally know how you feel.  It does not mean we will not love our babies as much, etc. and it is totally normal to feel disappointed when you were hoping for boy or a girl.  I know in the end I would not have imagined having it any way other than how God planned it.  But I just wanted to let you know I completely understand your post! 

PurpleK26

I was sure we were having a boy, and we're not. It took me a week or two for it to sink in and then once I started planning for a girl, I got more excited and it became more fun. We had everything all figured out for a boy, because DH had some specific ideas in mind for name, room etc. When we found out that she's a girl, we had to start all over!

Start looking and planning, and the excitement will come! 

tarapaige1

I was recently afraid that this would happen to me because I had gotten so excited about possibly having a boy.  I hadn't really thought much about having a girl since I wanted a boy so much.  I had a feeling I would be disappointed at my u/s if it was a girl and I didn't want to be upset about having a healthy baby!  So I started looking around online at all the cute little girl things we'd be able to buy if it was a girl and that got me excited really fast!  Once you start looking around and thinking of all the fun girl things you'll get to do I think that will help you

Ciconrad

You just need to get over it.  Sorry, I don't have sympathy over anyone boowoo-ing over gender disapointment.  I have known too many people who have gotten really bad news at their big u/s to have an ounce of sympathy in my heart because your kid has a vagina when you wanted a penis. 

FWIW, you are worried about a girl causing drama and being a handful??  Seriously?  That is way more dependent on the child's personality than the gender.  I was an angel until the day I left home - never gave my parents a single problem.  My brother - now he was a handful from the beginning and stayed that way.  My mother would tell you boys are way harder than girls, even as teenagers.  You want a handful?  Come hang out with my BOY for an afternoon....he's hyperactive and strong willed.  I love him to death but he's not easy.  I am going to take a guess he'll be that way at 16 too.

sunnybrook.

I've been heartbroken when my u/s revealed my little one had no heartbeat after just recovering from another miscarriage.

I was frustrated and sad that I had to inject myself with 100s of shots to get pregnant. I was in pain because I had to have 5 surgeries to conceive. 

I am terrified that my uterus may rupture or that I will be forced to have a hysterectomy during delivery b/c of complications from my surgeries.

So.....to answer your question, I would never feel disappointed to not get what I believed to be an "easier" gender. I am excited  that I made it this far in the pg and I can only pray that I will be holding two healthy little ones in my arms and the end of this journey.

Seriously, be grateful for what you have.

duchessII81

Yes... but not due to gender disappointment.

We were Team Green, discussed it beforehand with the dr, and he proceeded to spoil it. 

So I guess I was not stoked about the dr's behavior at the u/s.

projectkjetil

I used to get snarky with people over gender disappointment.  After all, it seems like a pretty rare phenomenon in women who have had to work their asses off to get pregnant in the first place.

But... then I had to admit to myself that I've experienced it, if only just a little. 

With our first child, we were on Team Green but were so sure it was a boy we might as well have been Team Blue.  It's just that we were wrong.

Now that I've been a girl mom for five years, it was really hard to get my head around the idea that baby is a boy.  Since about five seconds after conception I've just had a 'feeling,' but getting the proof came with another brief flicker of disappointment.

I think it has to do with how little control we have in this process.  Some of us can get pregnant easily, some can't.  Some of us have easy pregnancies, some have terrifying trips to the ER throughout.  Some of us will have easy labors, some won't.

I wish you good luck in getting used to the news of your little girl.  Maybe you'll embrace the pink, maybe you won't.  Don't pressure yourself either way.  Just know that you'll love her no matter what.

s&jsmom

Read about 12 posts up and get ovet it...

Sept_Bride'07

All_Planned:

I agree with pp BUT if it makes you feel any better....15 weeks is pretty early and the u/s could be wrong.

I'd trust the u/s at the 24+ weeks...So it could still be a boy - Good Luck

this is horrible advice.

op, seriously you need to get over it.

lilhotcandie69

I'm sorry if I'm not sympathetic like the others but seriously get over it. You should be happy your having a healthy baby. Plenty of women would give anything to be pregnant right now...so quit complaining and grow up. Your gonna be a mom now. As for the drama situation...your making drama by fretting over this and complaining about it...so stop it.

lilhotcandie69

Ciconrad:

You just need to get over it.  Sorry, I don't have sympathy over anyone boowoo-ing over gender disapointment.  I have known too many people who have gotten really bad news at their big u/s to have an ounce of sympathy in my heart because your kid has a vagina when you wanted a penis. 

FWIW, you are worried about a girl causing drama and being a handful??  Seriously?  That is way more dependent on the child's personality than the gender.  I was an angel until the day I left home - never gave my parents a single problem.  My brother - now he was a handful from the beginning and stayed that way.  My mother would tell you boys are way harder than girls, even as teenagers.  You want a handful?  Come hang out with my BOY for an afternoon....he's hyperactive and strong willed.  I love him to death but he's not easy.  I am going to take a guess he'll be that way at 16 too.

You go girl. I totally agree with you and I wish more pregnant mothers would read this who are disappointed in there gender.

Athena5692

I just want to say thanks to all the SUPPORTIVE posters.  (Honestly, if you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all!)

I'm a 50% disabled Iraq Vet, I understand not everything thing in life comes out as you plan, but it doesn't mean we don't have the right to be upset when that happens.  It's always nice when you can reach out to people with something that you know makes you sound like a bad person, and realize that there are others like you, and that you're not necessarily 'bad' because of it.

To 90% of the posters, I hope my little girl grows up to be as compassionate as you! 

lilhotcandie69

Athena5692:

I just want to say thanks to all the SUPPORTIVE posters.  (Honestly, if you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all!)

I'm a 50% disabled Iraq Vet, I understand not everything thing in life comes out as you plan, but it doesn't mean we don't have the right to be upset when that happens.  It's always nice when you can reach out to people with something that you know makes you sound like a bad person, and realize that there are others like you, and that you're not necessarily 'bad' because of it.

To 90% of the posters, I hope my little girl grows up to be as compassionate as you! 

The thing is your missing the big picture. Plenty of women would do anything to be pregnant and be in your position, so being upset about having a girl instead of a boy I find ridiculous, just be happy your baby is healthy. Plus numerous women have a bad experience at there big U/S...like miscarriages or some defect. I understand if your shocked cause we all can get a certain gender stuck in our mind but don't be upset over it. Once you warm up to the idea of having a girl things we be much better. Try going baby shopping and seeing how cute the clothes are. Be happy you have a healthy baby.

LittleMamaB

Just because you are having some disappointment over the sex of your child does not for ONE minute mean that you aren't grateful for a healthy baby. The two are not mutually exclusive and clearly some people don't get that you can be thrilled to have a healthy child and still be disappointed about gender. Coming from a mother of three boys...I get it. It's normal for some women, and I'm sure you'll come around.

Congrats on your healthy baby!

lilhotcandie69

Good way to think of it...is you want your daughter to grow up like you...so think happy.

 Also, check out baby girl clothes and websites with baby girls names. You will get into the swing of things in no time. I was once in your boat.