helping DD w/ loss of friend?

JMay

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Hello - I usually post on another board, but I'm hoping you ladies might have some suggestions for me...sorry this is kind of long?

My DD was very good friends with a girl she met in playgroup at 12 months old.  I'll call the girl Katie.  Katie's mom and I got along well too, and we'd see each other regularly, at playgroup and during our own play dates. Katie and my DD eventually went to daycare together for about a year and a half, until they were almost 4..

In the interest of brevity, I'll just say that about 6 months ago Katie's mom got very upset with me over a misunderstanding (actually caused by Katie).  I apologized profusely for my part in the upset, and thought everything would be ok.  Katie's mom said everything was fine, but we haven't seen each other since.  This wasn't a huge deal, because my DD still got to see Katie at school.  However, last month, Katie changed schools.  (This change had been planned for over a year, so Katie did not leave because of us)

Anyway, every day since my DD has asked about Katie, and says how much she misses her. I?ve even caught her crying twice.  It breaks my heart.  Personally, I wasn?t so attached to either Katie or her mother that I?d mind not seeing them again, but I just feel so hurt for my DD, who lost a friend through no fault of her own.  To complicate the situation further, we are moving out of state in 6 months, at which point my DD would have to say goodbye anyway.

This is my question ? I could suck it up and contact Katie?s mom again in the hopes she?d be open for a few more play dates over the next 6 months, so at least my DD can say goodbye and have closure.  But I worry that she?ll get reattached to Katie, and leaving will be even more difficult.  Or, I could leave the situation as is, but then, what do I say to my DD about why she can?t see Katie anymore?  How can I help my DD recover from this loss?

TIA!    

JMay

Wow - I have no idea what's going on at the top of my post...

Littlejen22

Can you try to setup playdates with any of her other friends at school to try to get her a new bff?  Just trying to think.

lollitots

My first though was to set up a play date, but since you are moving anyway, I would just let it go.  She is young and will move on.  Just explain that Katie changed schools and that is why you can't see her. 

Andrewsgal

I would set up a couple of playdates so she can at least say good bye.

gogadget

do you really want to get involved again with this woman?? kids have disagreements all the time but to start a fight with you over it maybe she's a little off and it's better to part ways?? just a thought