question about FAM

goodgalpal

Please answer if you are comfortable doing so.

I am very serious about BC. This is because I really should not be getting pregnant at this time, even thought I WANT to, it just is not a good idea due to certain health and financial issues, as well as wanting to wait until I am out of school.

For those of you that use FAM, have you gotten pregnant while using that as your only method of BC? Were you consistent with temping/charting? I am just very nervous about the reliability of this method. 

We're currently using 3 methods of BC (none hormonal) in combination, so changing to FAM is something I am interested in but just wanted to hear some personal thoughts on it.

TIA

SapphyrEyes

I only used FAM to get pregnant.  Although this time was literally that I read my chart wrong because I didn't check all of my signs and I'm not calling her an oops because we weren't using a backup method.  I'd say it can be done following every rule, but to be on the safe side I'd still use condoms or abstain for a couple days to be safe.

katiej23

I'm new on this board, but wanted to let you know my experience with FAM.  I loooove FAM.  I was on hormonal birth control for our first 2 months of marriage and it wasnt' working out.  We switched to FAM after that and successfully avoided pregnancy for nearly a year, at which point we used the same charting/temping to conceive our child (on purpose, in case that wasn't clear.).  I was very consistent with the temping and charting, and while I was learning we used a barrier method for 3 entire cycles just so I could be confident.  If you don't already have it, Taking Charge of Your Fertility by Toni Weschler is an awesome reesource to learn all of the 'rules' for avoiding.

 After we have our baby, we will be going back to FAM.

triumphantreturnofplanningbug

Ditto that you MUST read TCOYF before charting to avoid pregnancy. Actually, I think everyone who has some lady bits, or knows someone who does, should read it.

I'm on my fifteenth cycle of FAM, love it, and no pregnancies yet. One scare when I was lazy, no bad results. I've panic peed on fewer sticks this last year than I did when I was on hormonal BC. The hardest part for me is taking my temp, since I'm not a morning person; I also have REALLY obvious fertility signs, though, so that helps me know exactly when to stay away from the ween. Give it 2-3 months of still using condoms all the time before relying solely on your fertility signs, just to be sure.

Mystery2B

I'll just reiterate what the pp said - I used it for over a year (closer to 18 months) to avoid pregnancy, and then to get pregnant took like 3 cycles.  If you are super wanting to avoid I'd plan on using a backup method for about 1.5 weeks per month (to be on the conservative side) - we never did that but it wouldn't have been the end of the world if there had been an "oops."

goinggreengirl

We used it (combined with condoms during fertile period) successfully for 9 cycles before getting pregnant. It was not a planned one but I'm blaming it on DH, not me. Sperm can live for up to 5 days in fertile cervical mucous... DH's lived for 6 and I didn't notice very fertile mucous... so, it's his fault.

LittleFuller

I'm on my 16th cycle of TTA with FAM.  We love it!  I was on BC pills for about 10 years prior to this.  We used backup for about 4 months, and DH wasn't comfortable with it until about 9 cycles.  He was paranoid!  Now, we don't even use condoms, just pulling out, during the fertile window. 

However, I should note, that this entire time we'd be perfectly fine with having a baby!  I also have very obvious fertility signs, and I ovulate every month like clockwork (once the hormones got out of my system), so my chart is easy to read.

goodgalpal

Thanks ladies!

I do have TCOYF but haven't been majorly serious about it. I too am not a morning person.... I am going to be more careful and start charting "for real" and use FAM for TTC when we're ready for it. I would ideally like to use it for prevention as well but I am just nervous about that side of it. I have zero problem with abstaining or using back up like condoms/spermicide and/or pulling out with the fertile window.

Right now, we are using condoms, spermicide, and pull out all together, and if I think I am fertile due to CM and time frame then we tend to also abstain. It can be difficult though because that is when I get "in the mood" more. LOL! Sorry if TMI. But you probably wouldn't have opened this post if you were concerned about TMI.....

triumphantreturnofplanningbug

goinggreengirl:

Sperm can live for up to 5 days in fertile cervical mucous... DH's lived for 6 and I didn't notice very fertile mucous... so, it's his fault.

This is both hilarious and terrifying.

suzymarie

We did it and now we haven William

But, I wasn't very good at it- I will totally admit that.  I also don't do well with temping, so I was doing only cervical position and CM.

My LLL leader does it, and has had 3 suprises (out of 4 children).  She is very serious about it, follows the rules, etc.  However, every time she has gotten pg she has had a wierd/off month with her cycle, and didn't realize it in time- so the minute your cycle isn't textbook, you need to start using alternative protection. 

You definitely have to use back-up for 3+ months until you have your cycle figured out. 

Personally, I am not comfortable using it when I 100% don't want to get pg.  I would use the Mirena for that.  But if I only 80% didn't want to get pg, I would be fine with it (assuming I was more strict about following the rules).

Dr.Loretta

We are using NFP, which is FAM with religion

I have not gotten pregnant when TTA using NFP. However, I have unexplained IF. My brother and SIL have used it for over 10 years to TTA and TTC with no problems at all.

I was sometimes not as consistent as other cycles, maybe because I knew we'd bein a situation where it was impossible to get pregnant over my fertile time.

IMO, you should definitely look into it and use backup BC until you've established a pattern you're comfortable with. It's quite likely that you have regular cycles and will see a pattern you can live with in fairly short order.

Good luck.

FutureMrsLemon

goodgalpal:

Thanks ladies!

I do have TCOYF but haven't been majorly serious about it. I too am not a morning person.... I am going to be more careful and start charting "for real" and use FAM for TTC when we're ready for it. I would ideally like to use it for prevention as well but I am just nervous about that side of it. I have zero problem with abstaining or using back up like condoms/spermicide and/or pulling out with the fertile window.

Right now, we are using condoms, spermicide, and pull out all together, and if I think I am fertile due to CM and time frame then we tend to also abstain. It can be difficult though because that is when I get "in the mood" more. LOL! Sorry if TMI. But you probably wouldn't have opened this post if you were concerned about TMI.....

 

I used the FAM to help me track my cycles and learn my fertility signs before actively trying to get pregnant. I charted for about 9 months prior to actively trying to conceive (we conceived our first cycle trying). We also used condoms in conjunction to FAM because DH doesnt really "trust" FAM alone. But I fully plan on going back to FAM after baby. And one day I would love to use it alone. But unfortunately my cycles are pretty irregular so that may not be a possibility.