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help me fix the mixed up days/nights...

groovygrlgroovygrl member
in Success after IF

how do i fix this? they are always SO awake at night & do not always sleep at all between feedings (although they are still eating every 2 1/2 hrs on avg at 5 weeks)... in the beginning I figured give it time but I feel like it has gotten worse. I turn down all the lights except one on a side table, I try not to watch tv much, generally keep everything quiet etc...

the sleep books dont seem to have much about this other than those general basic tips about making daytime lighter & noisier & nighttime darker & quieter...

any ideas/ thanks! 

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Re: help me fix the mixed up days/nights...

  • LucyPevensieLucyPevensie member
    you gotta have little to no light and get that TV off if they're in the room - and don't talk to them (or anybody else) when doing night time business - feeding or changing.  just take care of everything quietly and calmly and then lots of gentle shushing to try and get babies back to sleep.  And yes, during the day, lots of light and smiling and happy and music and stimulation.  Night time - don't talk to them and keep everything just calm, gentle and dark. 
    Wheee!
    image

    "When it comes to sleeping, whatever your baby does is normal. If one thing has damaged parents enjoyment of their babies, it's rigid expectations about how and when the baby should sleep." ~ James McKenna, Ph.D., Mother Baby Behavioral Sleep Center, University of Notre Dame

    image
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  • na24na24
    How long are they sleeping during the day?  I wouldn't let them sleep longer than three hours.
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  • groovygrlgroovygrl member
    hehe...3 hrs, I wish :). They still feed every 2 1/2 hrs on average although sometimes 3 hrs so until i've fed one & then the other they probably sleep a max of 2 hrs ever. If i actually try to get an 'activity' in there like tummy time or being on an activity mat or bouncy chair, it's less. 
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  • na24na24

    Do you swaddle?  Swaddling at night could help.

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  • hannah&benhannah&ben

    imageLucyPevensie:
    you gotta have little to no light and get that TV off if they're in the room - and don't talk to them (or anybody else) when doing night time business - feeding or changing.  just take care of everything quietly and calmly and then lots of gentle shushing to try and get babies back to sleep.  And yes, during the day, lots of light and smiling and happy and music and stimulation.  Night time - don't talk to them and keep everything just calm, gentle and dark. 

    Ditto! This is exactly what I was going to say.  Keep things kinda noisy and bright during the day (even during naps - don't make the room super dark).  And at night, keep it as dim as you can during feedings and changes - and no talking!  Smiling is a no no here too which is soooooo hard!!! But if I smile Henry perks right up and starts smiling and laughing too... then he's ready to get up and party... not cool at 2 am!

    Hannah

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  • sara1014sara1014

    Oh my gosh!  Poor thing.  I think we've really lucked out here with the day/night stuff.  Mine usually are right back to sleep when they eat.  We pretty much started "fixing" it in the hospital because it freaked me out that they'd be up all.night.long.

    Definitely turn the TV off if they're where they can see it.  If you're up at night while they need to be sleeping, maybe you can watch hulu??  :)

    Our "routine" is like this...at their 8:00 feeding, we start to dim things, turn the TV down and the only activity they do is get talked to and chatted with...nothing else.  Then by their 11:00 feeding, it's absolute bedtime.  Lights are off, TV is off, and after they eat it's straight to the swaddle and into our room for bed.

    Then for any overnight feedings, if I need to talk to DH or mom or MIL (depending on who's helping - thank goodness the moms are still willing to come over)...it's a very low whisper.  I don't talk to the babies at all besides shushing them if they're upset.  We feed in silence and then it's straight to bed.  If they need a diaper change, this is done before we eat - and only after if there's a poop while feeding.  That way, the bottle makes them a little drowsy.  I turn on the light in the room to change them but it's on as low as it will go.  

    During the day, it's life as usual here.  When they nap, which I started yesterday in their crib, I leave the blinds cracked a bit so there's light coming in, leave the door all the way open, and make sure I go about my usual business.  Yesterday I even made the dog bark so they'd have some noise in the house.  

     

    Good luck! 

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