Limit on people holding your baby — The Bump
Babies: 0 - 3 Months

Limit on people holding your baby

Do you have a limit as to how much you let people hold or carry your baby? The other day we had a family get-together at our house and all 35 members of our family ended up carrying the baby and passing him around from arm to arm. When everyone left that night, I was stuck with a crying/fussy baby til 2am while everyone was home sleeping. It bothered me enough to maybe start setting a limit but I don't want to seem like a b!tch.
Lilypie Third Birthday tickers

Re: Limit on people holding your baby

  • Ugh, how annoying. It's hard because you want friends and family to take joy in the baby, too, but then you're left with the consequences.

    We were at a wedding this weekend and at one point, I just started saying, "Ya know, I think I'm going to hold on to her at this point...she's feeling a little overstimulated tonight." Some people showed disappointment, but everyone understood.

     

    Pregnancy Ticker Pregnancy Ticker
  • Loading the player...
  • babies do get sore from being passed around a lot. I would just let people know the baby needs to rest for a little while
  • Loading the player...
  • You're not a ***, you're a mom. I struggled with the same issues when LO was first born, but now I don't have a problem taking him back when I want him.

    I don't think you have to tell people you're "setting a limit"; though. Just do it instead. If anyone gives you grief, you can tell them he gets cranky when overstimulated, etc.

  • you set the limits and they should respect that.  if they dont, i guess they dont get to hold LO.  I personally wouldnt let everyone hold LO at once.  I never had more than a few people present at the house at one time except for one time.  There were about 7 people there and I was a bit overwhelmed
  • imagelewis610:
    babies do get sore from being passed around a lot. I would just let people know the baby needs to rest for a little while

    Amazing enough, some people don't even respect that. I've had people actually take my child out of his crib while he's sleeping. Can you believe that!? It's soooo annoying.

    Lilypie Third Birthday tickers
  • Yes, I try to.  I tend to hold him unless someone asks.  If he's getting passed around a little too much, then I go over to the person and say "I need to take him for a second."  Then I go and change him or whatever.  Babies really shouldn't be awake anymore than 2 hours at a time also, and that's a lot of stimulation for them.  I hate when company stays too long or we end up leaving the house a couple days in a row.  I end up with a cranky baby.  He's much happier when he gets his naps in and he's in his own house with just the two of us.
  • I'm planning on wearing DS at our family gathering so he's not passed around.  Maybe if he's asleep I'll let them hold him, but he's still mainly sleeping and eating and he gets overwhelmed so mom's the favorite. 
  • Try to limit how many people come to your house and for how long. I wish I would of done that myself. It will be better for your sanity and for your baby.
  • We went to my aunt & uncle's 50th anniversary when DS was 2 weeks old.  I told my family that no one was holding him except DH & I- mostly just kept him in the carseat/stroller.  We allowed family to hold him at my aunt & uncle's house-- but even then it was very limited.  I went to a wedding reception on Saturday and I kept him in the stroller again or I held him.

    The only time we had a large gathering at the house was following his Baptism, and that was all immediate family.  He slept for awhile while being held and I don't think everyone held him.

    Limiting is good.  If people are offended, so be it.  You have to look out for LO's best interests.

    Married to the Love of My Life since September 14, 2002. 
    Me: 39 DH: 36
    BFP#1: 10/20/08,  EDD: 6/29/09
    PIH, bedrest for 4 wks, delivered at 39 weeks by induction and then c-section- Healthy baby boy on 6/24/09 :-)

    BFP#2: 11/24/11, EDD: 8/4/12, Angel Baby- 2/19/12
    Enlarged bladder seen on U/S at 12 weeks (1/15/12), possibly LUTO or Prune Belly, Heartbeat at OB on 2/17/12,
    No heartbeat/movement at U/S on 2/20/12, (missed MC), D&E:2/22/12.  Miscarried our sweet angel boy @ 16 wks

    TTCAL since June 2012, 
    Progesterone normal, FSH elevated & AMH on the low side--  "ovaries acting older"
    Clomid cycles: 50 mg in February, July, August, September, November 2013, June 2014--  BFNs!!  :-(
    August & September 2014: Clomid, HCG and IUI-- BFNs
    September 2014: FSH= 15.7 AMH= 0.25  UGH!!!  Old lady Ovaries!!!
    October & November 2014: Gonadatropin injections, HCG & IUI... BFNs!!

    We have been blessed with a sweet little boy.  
    Hoping to be able to give him a sibling someday.
    Lilypie Kids Birthday tickers
  • imagetumpkin:

    imagelewis610:
    babies do get sore from being passed around a lot. I would just let people know the baby needs to rest for a little while

    Amazing enough, some people don't even respect that. I've had people actually take my child out of his crib while he's sleeping. Can you believe that!? It's soooo annoying.

    How on earth are people getting into his room when he's sleeping?

    Pregnancy Ticker Pregnancy Ticker
  • we had a similar problem, immediately give LO a bath, but when DS was in the bassinet people were less inclined to ask to hold him
    Lilypie Fourth Birthday tickers Lilypie Second Birthday tickers
  • 35 people wanting to hold the baby is a lot.  I think if I felt like too many people were holding the baby I'd say - he has to eat, he is getting tired/cranky, or he's sleeping so I am not going to let anyone hold him for a little while or something.  And I wouldn't feel bad about it even if people wanted to hold him.  I'd tell them later or next time and say today was a big day - it's too much for him.    
    I cannot believe people took him out of the bassinet to hold him.  I guess you can't leave him unattended in the bassinet around those ppl then.  We had 50 ppl over for the bris when DS was a week old and I just said today is a stressful day for him and me so no one is holding him today.  Luckily he ended up sleeping after the circumcism and people just looked at him in the bassinet (but either me, my parents or sister was there with him the whole time and they were all under strict orders not to let anyone hold him).  We even put mittens and socks on him so no one would be tempted to touch his hands or feet and it worked.
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards