Question for moms with older kids or stepkids

.completely.amazing.love.

My stepson (4) has never been around anyone who was breastfeeding. Quite a few people are telling me I should go in our bedroom to nurse the baby while he is here but I feel like that makes it seem like some big secret or something. I also feel like if we try to do it that way he will wonder why the baby never eats... and what I'm doing in the other room.

My SIL said that the reason she thinks we should do it that way is so that SS doesn't go home to his mom & say I saw stepmom's boob! But I just keep thinking it's not like I'm gonna just pop it out in front of him. I can be modest about him. I've had friends nurse their babies in front of me & I've never really "seen their boobs..."

 

Any advice here? What do you all do with your older children or step children?

thehimwithher

did it all the time in front of stepdtr but she was 10.  i felt weird about it at first but then it became the norm (i bf'd for a yr).  now, i see it as a good lesson in bfing for her, and her future children, b/c NO one in her family bf'd.  now she know and understands why i bf and the importance of it.  i think it was good for all of us.

it would be a little different with a boy though   i think until you get the 'hang' of it and can be fairly descrete, you sould go in the other room.  then, once you and the baby are really good at it, do it where ever.  jmo

MrsAmers

I have no qualms BFing in front of DD who is 2 1/2.  I wouldn't worry about it if she was a boy either.  Sure, sometimes she stares at me feeding her brother, but BFing is TOTALLY NATURAL and NORMAL and society needs to act like it, IMO.  There is nothing to be ashamed of and no reason to hide it from your stepson.

I nurse in front of anyone that is in my house.  And 95% of the time I nurse in front of anyone because I can do it discreetly and there is no reason for me to confine myself from social situations just because I'm going to feed my child.

madhatter2003

I nurse in front of DD all the time.  To me, it's natural and that's just one more thing about a new sibling that they'll get used to.  I don't think at 4 I'd be worried about covering up.  Maybe at 14 just since kids get embarrassed by things at that age, not at 4 though.

Knitty

Babies are part of life, and this is his little brother or sister. I would simply explain to him that when babies are born they don't eat food like he does, but just milk while they're little.You'll have to explain all sorts of things like this to him, that the baby can't talk or walk, that the baby can't smile or use the toilet.

There are tons of books around to show pictures of all sorts of babies nursing

https://picture-books.suite101.com/article.cfm/childrens_picture_books_about_breastfeeding

ErinNConnorsMom

Are you kidding me?  Good Lord, the boy is only 4 years old!  If you bf in front of him, it will be a fact of life that babies get their milk from their moms.  I bf in front of my kids, and never gave it a 2nd thought!  Depending on how close you are to your SS,  you may want to cover up, but if I were you, I certainly wouldn't hide away from the rest of the family.  I think that may do him more harm by not letting him be around his little sibling!

FriendlyFanny

My SS is 7 years older than DD. At first I went away from everyone while nursing, but as I became more comfortable it wasn't an issue. He lives with us full time so I don't really have to worry about him going and telling anyone about it. I think if you make a big deal out of it, so will he. If it just becomes a normal part of your routine and caring for the baby, it won't be a big deal and nothing to talk about to other people.