Jewish girls

AfterAll

Anyone have a shower?

Since we don't traditionally have showers (at least around here) and most of my friends are Jewish too, I had a small "Sprinkle" yesterday thrown by 2 of my friends for 11 people... it was nice, we ate, played some games, and I got some awesome gifts--it was so nice to be with all of my friends.

DH was weirded out by this (since MIL does not believe in showers or having anything in the house before baby is born)--- even though we have stuff and the room is ready. 

He doesn't want me to write thank yous until the baby is born.. I think that is a tad rude, no?

ETA:  For those of you who didn't see me post this before, I got this at my shower... love it!

Pennylane824

I have an ignorant question. If jewish people don't typically have showers does that mean they don't typically go to them either? I work with a girl who's jewish and it didn't even dawn on me that it might have been rude to invite her? I hope not.

Shananah

I dunno - I think us LA Jews are non-traditional, because my hostesses are just waiting until 37 weeks to throw my shower.

ETA:  And honestly, I think that was just a coincidence.

SusieQ1982

Well, if something terrible happened, is he planning on returning the gifts? I think that would be even more heartbreaking than just storing them. If you wouldn't return them then what's the point in delaying the thank yous?

I'm a nonpractising Jew. When I first found out I was pregnant my mom was uncomfortable with us getting everything ready but I told her I couldn't deal with getting it all at the last minute. I have had one shower already and will have another, and my nursery is mostly set up.

rissainthesky*

Yes, I had a shower and it was a ton of drama because my mom didn't want me to have one. Long story short, my friends threw me one and it turned out nice. I am halfway done with thank yous, I think they should be done now- I wouldn't want to deal with them with the new baby!

AfterAll

Pennylane824:

I have an ignorant question. If jewish people don't typically have showers does that mean they don't typically go to them either? I work with a girl who's jewish and it didn't even dawn on me that it might have been rude to invite her? I hope not.

I guess that is a personal preference.  I would think that most people that feel this way would just prefer not to receive gifts, but don't mind giving them or celebrating for others.  JMO.

orleyl

I had a shower, there are some traditions I dont follow. I do think u should send thank u cards. What I dont get is the whole no shower thing is related to not having any baby stuff before baby is born. If u have all the stuff already for baby then whats the difference if u have a shower? I just dont  get this tradition.

**Penny- I think it is fine for someone to go to a shower but not have their own. And not all jewish people follow this tradition. I dont think it was rude to invite her.

 

essey1234

i have never known anyone to not go to a shower . it is more a personal ( family obligation) choice not to have one, but i love them adn always go.

i would however send thank you cards to those who came and gave you a gift. i think it's the right thing to do. 

i will say that not having anything and not doing a shower is fine in principle, but when i see how prepared everyone is, i get freaked out that i have nothing. the only thing that keeps me at all calm is that DH's dad is not jewish and he is buying the car seat stroller and a pack and play so that i can bring the baby from the hospital. i know that my mom and sister and dh will go get everything as soon as the baby is born. but i need to find a way to stay calm

AfterAll

essey1234:

i will say that not having anything and not doing a shower is fine in principle, but when i see how prepared everyone is, i get freaked out that i have nothing. the only thing that keeps me at all calm is that DH's dad is not jewish and he is buying the car seat stroller and a pack and play so that i can bring the baby from the hospital. i know that my mom and sister and dh will go get everything as soon as the baby is born. but i need to find a way to stay calm

This is the exact reason we decided it was best for us to get things ready ahead of time.  I am a teacher and was off all summer and it just wasn't practical for me to sit around for 2+ months doing absolutely nothing, go back to work at 35 weeks and then scramble to get things together once LO arrives.

essey1234

i know and i am going nuts. my family is very religious. superstitious and sometimes very judgemental. if i bought anything , i would have to hide it.

there is something nice about not having that on your head and your wallet. my mom and i bought everything for my sister in a few hours, when she got home she was 100% set. my worry is that i won't be at the hospital long enough for them to do that . sometimes they send you home the same day 

metta1313

My family is back east and probably would have not thrown me a shower.  DH is not Jewish, though, and I don't really practice much, so when I co-worker asked if she could throw me a shower I said yes.  But I have to say I'm not that traditional these days.  At first my mom and grandma were going to wait to buy things until the baby came, and after I told her that DH and I were not going to wait to get things going, they totally broke down.  My grandma even got me the crib.  She explained to me that the whole tradition comes from super old superstitions and that back then, women stayed in the hospital for like a week so there was time for the family to prepare the home. 

schnookee

I love the onsie!  That's great!

Dancer6978

I did not have a shower, but that was due more to to living on the complete opposite side of the country from my family. However, some of my extended family members (who live elsewhere) did not have showers for superstition reasons.