Question for the new moms

ShannonLK

My MIL (who lives 700 miles away) wants to come out after the baby is born to help out.  I'm trying to figure out the best time for her to come.  I'll be having a c-section and DH is going to be home for about a week.  I know we need some time with just us and the baby.

When I had my 2 boys my mom was living so she was just always there to help.  Oh how I miss her.

Opinions?

Thanks!

 

DuffOliver

When you DH goes back to work! Awesome to have an extra set of hands while you're recovering, to be sure.

Or, maybe when the baby is 3-4 w old? As you know, that's when they star to 'wake up' and get a little fussier.

ShannonLK

DuffOliver:

When you DH goes back to work! Awesome to have an extra set of hands while you're recovering, to be sure.

Or, maybe when the baby is 3-4 w old? As you know, that's when they star to 'wake up' and get a little fussier.

I was kind of thinking about the 3-4 week mark.  By then I'm thinking the weather will also be a little better here!

mbg8r

I'm a dummy, I need to read the whole post...LOL

Anyway, recovering from your c won't be as bad as the previous, so 3-4 weeks might be ok, but I don't know how old your boys are so if you think you will need help juggling them, you may want her out there sooner.

ShannonLK

mbg8r:

I'm a dummy, I need to read the whole post...LOL

Anyway, recovering from your c won't be as bad as the previous, so 3-4 weeks might be ok, but I don't know how old your boys are so if you think you will need help juggling them, you may want her out there sooner.

My boys will be 14 & 10 but they are actually living with their dad in NC now so they won't be here when I have the baby.  My 2nd c-section was much easier than the 1st because I didn't labor.  I'm pretty confident I'll make out ok with this one.  Ehhh, unless being 10 years older will make a difference.

Moiselle

Well, unless DH plans to be hands on, then maybe she should come when DH goes back to work. Week 3-4?  They are easy at week 1-2.  That way you can stretch out her help.  I had a CS and it was HARD to get up constantly and feed her and pick her up without hurting.  After the first week, it was a little better, but it was still painful to maneuver with her.  At the end of week 2, I was off all pain medicine.

 And do rest the first week and take advantage of other people being there. 

ShannonLK

Moiselle:

Well, unless DH plans to be hands on, then maybe she should come when DH goes back to work. Week 3-4?  They are easy at week 1-2.  That way you can stretch out her help.  I had a CS and it was HARD to get up constantly and feed her and pick her up without hurting.  After the first week, it was a little better, but it was still painful to maneuver with her.  At the end of week 2, I was off all pain medicine.

 And do rest the first week and take advantage of other people being there. 

I believe DH will be quite hands on.  I think I'm leaning towards 3-4 weeks so I think that's what I'll tell her. 

mbg8r

ShannonL.K:

mbg8r:

I'm a dummy, I need to read the whole post...LOL

Anyway, recovering from your c won't be as bad as the previous, so 3-4 weeks might be ok, but I don't know how old your boys are so if you think you will need help juggling them, you may want her out there sooner.

My boys will be 14 & 10 but they are actually living with their dad in NC now so they won't be here when I have the baby.  My 2nd c-section was much easier than the 1st because I didn't labor.  I'm pretty confident I'll make out ok with this one.  Ehhh, unless being 10 years older will make a difference.

Ah, ok. LOL, yeah, being 10 years older may make a difference...I can't compare since I was old when I started, but I can say that being 39 with young kids is tough on a body!

My second was much easier than my first and I never labored (DD was breech), so the third may be easier again for you. I really liked my mom being around for the first two weeks but my DH is useless when they are babies so since yours is better, you'll be fine and having her around a little later when you are really in the thick of fatige will be wonderful.

trixiebelden

With both of my c-sections, I had someone come help weeks 2-3.  DH stayed home the first week and my mom, dad, or ILs came the next couple of weeks.  I actually hurt more after my second c/s for some reason.

Truthfully, the wacky hormones were pretty bad for me and having someone there for moral support was a huge help.  I hated being along for those first three weeks for some reason.  Having another person there allowed me to nap and talk to during the day.

pahokie

The 3-4 week mark may also be nice because by then your house will likely have been a bit neglected, so someone willing to help dust and vacuum will seem heaven-sent!