Grandparents calling grandchildren "their babies" — The Bump
3rd Trimester

Grandparents calling grandchildren "their babies"

does anyone else have this happen?  MIL keeps referring to our LO and BIL children as "her babies" this drives me crazy!  Um sorry, you already raised your two children.  This LO is DH and my baby and your GRANDbaby.  She also referred to my shower as her shower as well.  I think she is off her rocker.

BIL and SIL have decided to move out of state and she is getting worse.  She just referred to her baby in an email and I sounded all confused and asked if she meant her Grandbaby?  I thought she got it when she replied, but then she sent another email saying that "you don't know how much you love them when it's your child having a child until it happens to you" umm i never questioned your love or excitement.  just the wording of baby vs. grandbaby.

How have you handled this when it happens?

Re: Grandparents calling grandchildren "their babies"

  • My inlaws call the baby "our baby" and I give them the benefit of the doubt that they are just excited and don't actually mean anything stupid. Besides, they live on the other side of the country so they can't do much damage anyway.

    If it really bugged me, I'd have my husband talk to them.

  • I'm sure she's excited, but I would be a bit weirded out by that wording too. My MIL tends to be a bit much with my SD, and I already told DH  that she better learn fast that this little guy is MY child.
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  • Oh my gosh - my parents and IL's do this too! ?It is starting to drive me insane.?

    They keep saying - this is our baby! ?We will be having a baby soon! ?

    ?NO! ?This is mine and DH's baby - and last time I checked, he his in my ute and will be coming out of MY Vajajay!! ?

    Glad I am not the only one. ?I think I might lose it when they start to refer to my son as their "baby" once he is out of the womb. ?GRRRR

    Sorry I have no advice to cope...


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  • aciaacia member

    I wouldn't like that wording either.

    MIL refers to the baby as "ours" and even that bothers me. I am a bit worried that she's going to be a little "over-involved" with the baby and take away from the time I have to bond with the baby. Hopefully once the baby arrives I'm not going to have to make an issue of it...

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  • My ILs have never done this. It would weird me out.  My mom does it though, and it doesn't weird me out at all.  When she talks on the phone to my sister and her son is crying she says, "What's wrong w/ my baby?"
  • My mom kept calling me up and first thing out of her mouth was, "How's my baby?"  referring to MY inside baby.  So i would respond with a, "I'M doing fine thank you."  She got the hint.  Also at some point I think I told her that this annoyed me.  I feel very possessive of this baby already and understand why you don't like this behavior.  
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  • Doesn't bother me at all. I think I'm weird, most of the IL/parent stuff posted doesn't bother me.
  • My mother talks about my baby so much I asked my DH if my mother was pregnant.  The way she has been talking you would think she is 7 months pregnant : )
  • imagecindy453:
    Doesn't bother me at all. I think I'm weird, most of the IL/parent stuff posted doesn't bother me.

    This.  I actually find it kinda funny.

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  • sgrlsgrl member
    MIL does this. I ignore it. It's not worth the drama of bringing it up, IMO.
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  • Ugh!  This is one of my pet peeves!  My MIL doesn't do it but my mother does.  Both DH and I have corrected her and now she acts all sensitive about it (which means she still says "our baby" and then corrects herself as if it hurts her feelings that she's been told not to say that).  Oh's are annoying.  I'm sure I will annoy my kid too.
  • imagecindy453:
    Doesn't bother me at all. I think I'm weird, most of the IL/parent stuff posted doesn't bother me.

    Me too.  Heck most of the IL/parents stuff that is referenced on here doesn't even happen to us.  We live out of state and our family knows that we don't take their sh!t.  They all know we moved out of state to get away from their routine drama.

  • My MIL has called her daughter's baby 'my baby'.  Then after knowing I was pregnant for THREE days, she sent me an email asking about 'my baby'.  I had hubbie tell her right then that it bothered me.  She went crying to my SIL, who told her it would bother her too if her MIL said that, and now my MIL doesn't do it at all.  I think it never occured to her that it could be taken the wrong way. Maybe get your husband to talk to your MIL.
  • yes, but MIL is the only one. Every Sunday at church when expectant moms are listed on the prayer board she also asked to have "and grandmas" added. One sunday the guy in charge of the board was like "im not putting that, my wife would kill me." I thanked him later.
    Mom to 2 healthy boys, and a baby girl in Heaven. Heard her heartbeat on 7/18, heartbeat was gone on 7/20. Miss you forever.
  • MIL did this with DS and actually had the audacity to tell someone the other day that this was her baby and I was having DD for her.   UMMM.. I told DH our door will be locked and people will only be allowed in at certain times which makes me feel bad cause DS likes to go btw houses, but seriously just cause you had boys this is MY baby and DH baby NOT YOURS!!!!
  • It's funny you should ask. My MIL calls DS this all the time. It REALLY gets on my nerves. On the other hand, our relationship isn't great anyway and she does help with him so I let it go. I know that she knows he isn't hers. After all, she sees him once a week. I'm a SAHM so I get 99% of his time.

    There are a lot of annoying things with grandparents concerning babies. Just remember, YOU are the mom and you have to let some things slide.

  • I know the feeling. My mom keeps referring to our LO as her baby and it's driving me crazy! I told her couple of times that she is MY baby and her GRANDBABY, but she is saying that since I am her baby and the LO is my baby, that automatically makes my baby her baby.

    I hope she won't be referring to my girl that way when she is born.  

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