what's your thoughts on BYOB parties

eris1995

I have a friend that always throws BYOB parties or charges admission.    She's engaged and they own their house.  This weekend she's throwing herself an engagement/birthday party.  Personally I think once you get to a certain age/place in your life they are tacky.  Just wondering what everyone else's thought on them were. Oh and I'm not talking about broke college years.

Mjmksb04

It depends on the type of party. If its a laid back barbecue with a certain group of friends, BYOB is just fine. In fact in general for a house party we typically BYOB, but that is just how my group of friends operates. But if its a party for an event like an engagement, it is sort of tacky.

EcoBaby

Charges ADMISSION?!?! You've gotta be freaking kidding me. That's crazy. We aren't 16 anymore.

I don't think BYOB is a big deal. Its nice to have get togethers, but paying for everyone's alcohol can get expensive. However, charging admission is ridiculous.

PD's_Momma

I don't think BYOB is a bad idea. All of our friends have different taste in Beer & someone will only drink the really expensive imported stuff. So they just bring there own.

Is she providing all the food? I don't agree with charging admission. But to me BYOB is not that big of a deal.

anls520

I think it's tacky not to provide the liquor at your own party, and I think it's rude not to bring some type of liquor or gift to a party. DH and I always provide and bring something.

jess1984

EcoBaby:

Charges ADMISSION?!?! You've gotta be freaking kidding me. That's crazy. We aren't 16 anymore.

I don't think BYOB is a big deal. Its nice to have get togethers, but paying for everyone's alcohol can get expensive. However, charging admission is ridiculous.

this

LucyGoosey81

I think BYOB is tacky.  If you can't afford to have a party where you pay for everything, you simply should not have a party, or downgrade to something you can afford.  There doesn't HAVE to be alcohol at a party.

I won't even get into charging admission!  Eww!

littleittybitty

anls520:

I think it's tacky not to provide the liquor at your own party, and I think it's rude not to bring some type of liquor or gift to a party. DH and I always provide and bring something.

My exact thoughts. 

mabst196

We normally swtich off with friends who is hosting so the purchasing of alcohol tends to end up even. I see no problem with BYOB for a casual affair. Having a party and charging admission is reserved for college students and having an engagement party and asking anyone to bring anything with them is tacky.

LucyGoosey81

littleittybitty:

anls520:

I think it's tacky not to provide the liquor at your own party, and I think it's rude not to bring some type of liquor or gift to a party. DH and I always provide and bring something.

My exact thoughts. 

I do agree with the second part.  We always bring something when we go to a party.  But to make it a requirement lacks tact.

bnljane1988

mabst196:

We normally swtich off with friends who is hosting so the purchasing of alcohol tends to end up even. I see no problem with BYOB for a casual affair. Having a party and charging admission is reserved for college students and having an engagement party and asking anyone to bring anything with them is tacky.

This?

EcoBaby

LucyGoosey81:

 There doesn't HAVE to be alcohol at a party.

Yeah there does

eris1995

EcoBaby:

Charges ADMISSION?!?! You've gotta be freaking kidding me. That's crazy. We aren't 16 anymore.

I don't think BYOB is a big deal. Its nice to have get togethers, but paying for everyone's alcohol can get expensive. However, charging admission is ridiculous.

yep!  She had a halloween party one year and there was a $10 cover charge.  I understand that throwing a party can be expensive, but I kind of have the mindset of don't throw a huge bash if you can't cover the cost.  DH and I have a yearly party in the summer and have food & beer.  If someone wants something else to drink they can bring it.  Most people call us and ask if there's something they can bring and we give them a small side dish to bring. 

DG1

LucyGoosey81:

I think BYOB is tacky.  If you can't afford to have a party where you pay for everything, you simply should not have a party, or downgrade to something you can afford.  There doesn't HAVE to be alcohol at a party.

I won't even get into charging admission!  Eww!

This. Although I often bring my own anyway, since I don't like beer.

But I can't imagine throwing a party and not providing alcohol, water, and soda in addition to the food.

Ladybugs879

I agree that it depends on the type of party.  I don't think I would be going if she charge me admisson. 

MrsL.inMarch

I totally read your title as "BYOB paNties" LOL

eris1995

MrsL.inMarch:

I totally read your title as "BYOB paNties" LOL

LOLOLOLOL

eris1995

Ladybugs879:

I agree that it depends on the type of party.  I don't think I would be going if she charge me admisson. 

I haven't gone to any of her parties.  I figure if you have a group of friends and they all have a party once a year the cost of alcohol evens out. 

anls520

LucyGoosey81:

littleittybitty:

anls520:

I think it's tacky not to provide the liquor at your own party, and I think it's rude not to bring some type of liquor or gift to a party. DH and I always provide and bring something.

My exact thoughts. 

I do agree with the second part.  We always bring something when we go to a party.  But to make it a requirement lacks tact.

 

I'm not saying it should be a requirement to bring something to a party.  I wouldn't make anyone bring anything.  But do I think it's rude not to?  YES.

Mistyl

I think BYOB is ok, but charging admission is tacky in my opinion.

meganet22

Charging admission is absurd...that's something you do to college freshman when you rent a house and they are living in the dorms.  Do you actually pay her to go her parties??

I think if people ask what can they bring it's ok to ask for a case of beer, but if you are throwing a party your are responsible for food and alcohol.

eris1995

meganet22:

Charging admission is absurd...that's something you do to college freshman when you rent a house and they are living in the dorms.  Do you actually pay her to go her parties??

I think if people ask what can they bring it's ok to ask for a case of beer, but if you are throwing a party your are responsible for food and alcohol.

nope- I feel like a biitch sometimes, but I refuse to go to her parties.

prettypinkypeonies

Admission is tacky, tacky, tacky.

BYOB I don't mind, as long as you provide something.. We usually bring our own drinks when we go to a party, anyway.  I hate drinking other people's beer!

littleittybitty

Here's the thing: some people drink and drink and drink. If it's free, they think it's a free for all. Instead of having a glass of wine or a couple of beers they drink their weight and then some. H and I have now figured out who these individual's are and either stop inviting them or kindly ask "Hey, could you do us a HUGE favor and pick up some on the way? We will pay you back when you get here!". By then they are so smashed they dont even remember

stfne

Charging admission is tacky.  BYOB is OK for a barbecue-type of party, but not for a birthday, engagement, or other "event" type of party.

preg_amy

littleittybitty:

Here's the thing: some people drink and drink and drink. If it's free, they think it's a free for all. Instead of having a glass of wine or a couple of beers they drink their weight and then some. H and I have now figured out who these individual's are and either stop inviting them or kindly ask "Hey, could you do us a HUGE favor and pick up some on the way? We will pay you back when you get here!". By then they are so smashed they dont even remember

 

Yeah, that's tacky too (getting wasted at a party).  

I agree with other posters who say that BYOB requirement is tacky, but that you should bring something anyway because it's a nice thing to do.

And admission is ridiculous.  Seriously... does she think her parties are that wonderful or what?

msabol2077

I think the fact that she charges admission is ridiculous. I would not even go. How could you charge your friends to hangout at your house? The BYOB situation I can see bc my friends and I usually BYOB to a small gathering or even a backyard bbq. If its a bday party or engagement, basically anything that a person is bringing a gift to is very tacky.

CrazeyJaneyR

Hi! Yeah, it's kind of silly to charge people at your own home for a party where people are bringing gifts. That sounds kind of greedy.

?I guess I can see BYOB to a casual BBQ, but I would NEVER expect people to BYOB or even ask them to. I don't drink (ever) and I always buy beer and drinks for people at my house. ?

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LucyGoosey81

anls520:

LucyGoosey81:

littleittybitty:

anls520:

I think it's tacky not to provide the liquor at your own party, and I think it's rude not to bring some type of liquor or gift to a party. DH and I always provide and bring something.

My exact thoughts. 

I do agree with the second part.  We always bring something when we go to a party.  But to make it a requirement lacks tact.

 

I'm not saying it should be a requirement to bring something to a party.  I wouldn't make anyone bring anything.  But do I think it's rude not to?  YES.

I COMPLETELY agree

Judah'sMommy

EcoBaby:

LucyGoosey81:

 There doesn't HAVE to be alcohol at a party.

Yeah there does

Dude, throw a party without alcohol if you want, but don't expect people to stay long! lol

Our friends would revolt.

nuttybunch

Well, they're not my style. I understand them to a certain point, though. DH has a large family and they always do pot-lucks. The host/hostess will provide the main course and everyone else will bring the sides and desserts.

However, my BIL and SIL have Halloween parties every year. They make people bring their own drinks AND food to share, and we STILL have to buy costumes. So pretty much they supply the venue. Makes me SO MAD!!!

I can understand maybe bringing your own drinks OR a dish to share, but BOTH??? And they own a home and are married (obviously) and pushing 30. They're irresponsible with money, too.

I think if you can't afford to have a party, don't.

Mjmksb04

Judah'sMommy:

EcoBaby:

LucyGoosey81:

 There doesn't HAVE to be alcohol at a party.

Yeah there does

Dude, throw a party without alcohol if you want, but don't expect people to stay long! lol

Our friends would revolt.

 

No kidding. That would just not fly with our circle.

LucyGoosey81

Judah'sMommy:

EcoBaby:

LucyGoosey81:

 There doesn't HAVE to be alcohol at a party.

Yeah there does

Dude, throw a party without alcohol if you want, but don't expect people to stay long! lol

Our friends would revolt.

Actually, my friends would too.  Hahaha! We always provide lots, and lots, and lots of alcohol.  But I think we hang out with lushes!  Ha!

All I was saying is that if you can't afford to have alcohol, don't have alcohol instead of asking people to bring it.  Also, if you put on the invitation that there will be pop, appetizers, and dinner (or whatever), people may be inclined to bring their own booze.  There are tactful ways to go about it.

mrskadams

I see nothing wrong with BYOB if it's a get together or backyard BBQ, not an official "party."  I used to have a big group of friends, and we just liked fixing hamburgers and hanging out.  It happened all the time, and I was the one with the decent sized house, so it usually happened there.  I couldn't afford to supply them with alcohol all the time, so it was understand to bring whatever booze you wanted.