When I think of going back to SAL...

BabyRN2009

I get this sinking feeling in my stomach...I don't want to be 4 or 5 or 6 weeks pregnant again!!  Those were such scary and "unknown" weeks!!!  Can't I just skip ahead to 8 weeks where I left off last time??  Ugh.  I so badly want to be pregnant again, but since we've already endured the first few super scary weeks doesn't it seem fair that we all should get to skip them next time?  I do envy those women who somehow don't find out they're pregnant until 2 or 3 months in...instead I have to test super early for the purpose of taking progesterone supplements and early monitoring.  *Sigh* 

Mrs.BigCountry

I haven't made it to SAL yet, since I have only been pregnant the one time.  But I know what you mean.  My scary weeks were from 10w to 17w, so I don't know when I will feel "safe" in my next pregnancy.  I just keep with the mantra "My desire to have a baby is greater than my fear of having another miscarriage."

 

cintim

I agree. Ignorance is bliss sometimes, huh? I was one of the lucky ones who didn't find out I was pg until I was 11 weeks with my DD. I only had really only 1 week until I was out of the scary zone. I found out I was pg when I was 8 weeks when I lost my baby. I never did get out of that scary zone. With my next pg, I'm sure I'll find out extra early since I'm charting and don't think I'll ever be out of the scary zone.

BabyRN2009

RzrbckMomma:

"My desire to have a baby is greater than my fear of having another miscarriage."

Thank you for reminding me of this, it is sooo true and the only thing that keeps me going sometimes!!

dandyelle

I've watched that show "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant" a few times... I always think to myself, wouldn't it be easier on me mentally if a lil one just showed up one day??? Especially for people like us who are TTC and think about it a majillion times a day.

BabyRN2009

cintim:

I agree. Ignorance is bliss sometimes, huh? I was one of the lucky ones who didn't find out I was pg until I was 11 weeks with my DD. I only had really only 1 week until I was out of the scary zone. I found out I was pg when I was 8 weeks when I lost my baby. I never did get out of that scary zone. With my next pg, I'm sure I'll find out extra early since I'm charting and don't think I'll ever be out of the scary zone.

Yes, ignorance would definitely be bliss in this situation!!  I just don't have any faith in the first few weeks of pregnancy anymore...I've been there twice and failed twice.  I dont' know what I'm going to do the next time to convince myself that "this is it we WILL have a baby in 9 months".  It's going to be sooo hard to trust and not be anxious and fearful every second of every day.  Even an ultrasound and seeing a heartbeat won't mean success to me anymore...I had 2 perfect ultrasounds this last time and still m/c'd.  That's why I'm glad we have this board and SAL because everyone understands....I only have a couple people IRL who truly understand and have been in this situation before.  I don't feel like I'll ever be out of the "scary zone" either...there will always be something to worry about no matter how far along we are!! 

BabyRN2009

dandyelle:

I've watched that show "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant" a few times... I always think to myself, wouldn't it be easier on me mentally if a lil one just showed up one day??? Especially for people like us who are TTC and think about it a majillion times a day.

Wouldn't that be nice?  I just don't understand how that happens....and apparently it happens to enough people that they can make a TV series out of it!!  

abs711

I totally agree.  I was watching "I didn't know I was pg" (cause I like to torture myself) last night and I was like how nice would it be to have 5 minutes to worry and then bamn baby!  I know it is horrible to go with out prenatal care and all - but gosh for all of us who are pretty much prepairing our bodies anyway how nice would that be?!?!

mcjb09

agreed- I've only had one loss (never been on SAL) but we lost our LO at 23 weeks (PPROM). So I probably won't feel out of the 'Scary Zone' till I'm actually holding our living, breathing baby.

bebeblues

I know what you mean. With dd, I found out at barely 5 wks pregnant....that was a long, but h&h pregnancy....my sil found out this last time at 3wks that she was pregnant and she's now in wk 15 and she's fine.....

 W/my BO, I found out I was pregnant at 7 wks, found out it didn't look good at 8wks and had a d&c at 10w5d. I wish I could skip ahead next time too.....I wish we could all just have h&h pregnancies, just as we all had dreamed......

 

CarrieLeigh84

mcjb09:

agreed- I've only had one loss (never been on SAL) but we lost our LO at 23 weeks (PPROM). So I probably won't feel out of the 'Scary Zone' till I'm actually holding our living, breathing baby.

 

This. This times a bazillion.

Strunella

It is scary to think about and it's not going to be easy for any of us to face the threat of another m/c.  But my friend has a saying, "You've got to keep on keeping on."  We have to keep on thinking that there is a light at the end of the tunnel.  We have to look to the future and know that we are going to be moms.  We're taking a more challenging path to motherhood than many, but we have to keep believing that our time will come.