Shower: Who Should be invited?

swayed

I originally posted this on the Baby Shower board, but that place doesn't seem to get much traffic!

I don't have a close group of friends where I live. Most of my friends live scattered across the country, and my husband's family is all 3,000 miles away.  I was trying to compile my invitation list for the person hosting my shower, and I started wondering what was appropriate as far as who should be invited.  I know that my MIL and my husband's grandmother and aunts will be invited, even though I know they won't be able to attend.  But what is the ettiquette with friends who live far away?  I don't want people to think that they are just getting a request for a gift, but I also don't want to leave out people that would be invited if they lived closer.  Any thoughts?   

Brittni Rimmer

Hmm...send them an invitation anyways?

My rule of thumb (not sure if this is proper etiquette) is that if you don't come, you're not expected to bring a gift.

Leap08

I live pretty far away from my family and many close friends. I was only planning on sending invites to local friends and immediate family members. If you know people won't attend, I don't see the point in sending an invitation. It's kind of like asking them to send a gift. I'd wait until the baby is born and then send everyone a birth announcement.  

Tinkx123x

babyemily:

Hmm...send them an invitation anyways?

My rule of thumb (not sure if this is proper etiquette) is that if you don't come, you're not expected to bring a gift.

This! I assume the same thing. If you don't come I don't expect a gift! I don't know if this was wrong but I didn't invite the relatives that live far away and had no chance of coming. 

Anna&Matt

I would invite them but preface it with I totally understand if you can't be there and we do not expect a gift conversation with those people before you send the invites.

We are not inviting aunts and such who live far away though. Just MIL & SIL and one of my close friends.