Naming the baby after my dad

pregnantchica

My dad passed away about a year and a half ago and my dh and I knew that we were going to use his name as a middle name for the baby.  My dad has a strong name....Marino (that's why we decided to make it a middle name).  If it was a girl, which it is we were going to use Marina. 

Well, a couple of weeks ago, we told my mom that we haven't decided on a first name, but we know for sure that her middle name will be Marina, no matter what.  Today, she tells me that she thinks that it's "too strong" of a middle name.  She'd rather we create a combination of his and her name which she came up with Lamari.  I'm sort of confused...I didn't get a chance to go into details about this with her, but I'm wondering if she didn't want us to use his name. 

She's still hurting over losing him so soon (it was a shock, needless to say), so I'm wondring if it would remind her too much of him.  Although, we still talk about him and have pics of him around the house.  We still light a candle every month on his anniversary...What do you think?

NiniJ55

I think Marina is a nice name - not too strong in my opinon.  I think you should stick with your original plan and your mom should respect that.

mreinard

There's no way to know what she's thinking or feeling without asking her... Have you had a chance ot talk about why she doesn't want you to use Marina? I personally think it is beautiful and the reason behind it makes it even more special.  I don't think it is too strong of a name either.  Good luck and keep the communication open!

getnmarried910

I think Marina is pretty and not "too strong."  I think that this is your baby and no one else gets naming rights.  I think it's a great way to honor your dad.  I bet eventually, when your mom has healed a little more, she will really enjoy having a granddaughter named after your dad.

Nicole731

I think it's your baby and it's not really up to your mom. I like Marina and I don't think it's too strong at all. Lamari is just...nms.

beekkah

I like Marina too.  It might be hard for your mom at first but in a few years I think she will like having the sweet memory of your father everytime she looks at your daughter.  I am sure it is still hard for her now but it will get easier.  I say leave her middle name as Marina.

irishbaby0708

I'm so for your loss i know all to well how much it hurts dealing with a loss of a parent.  I think you should go with your first choice since it feels right to you.  I think your dad would be very pleased to have you name his grand baby after him and i don't think it's too strong of a name. 

Desmond&MollyJones

Marina is great, and I think it's a nice way to remember your father.  I would go for it.

Bubbles1022

I don't think Marina or Marino is too strong at all for a middle name!  I think it is a wonderful idea to use as a middle name to honor your father.  I would talk to her about it and find out what is bothering her and go ahead with using the name as you and dh see fit.  I'm sure she is still hurting over the loss but I think over time she will grow to really love it.

brandyward

I love Marina.

SLHurst11

Tell your mom that you want to honor your dad with that name, and you really think it's perfect as it is.  Ask her straight out if it would hurt her or be difficult for her to deal with, and just go from there.  Hopefully, she'll be okay with it, but there's definitely room for you to give your mom a little respect if she'll have a hard time with the name.

jkfranklin

I like Marina also.  I think that you should go with it.  It's only a middle name and does not have to be used if you don't want it to be.  Middle names aren't used often after the first few months.

I hope this makes sense.

pregnantchica

Thanks for your responses ladies!

We didn't get into it further because one, I was leaving for work, and two, I was shocked...I guess...I didn't know what to say to her.  Like many of you said, we made this decision a long time ago and we are going to stick with it.  We are aware that middle names aren't used that much anyway (that's why we don't care if it goes/flows with the first name that we finally choose).  I will dig further into this with my mom as soon as I have a chance to talk to her (by herself) again.

babystella08

I think you should do what you want. It is your baby.

fiftysixty

Marina is a beautiful name. It may just be very hard for her still, but I doubt it's too likely that you'll call the baby by her middle name anyway?

I'm sure it hurts now, but in the years to come I think it will be a beautiful way to remember. Don't let it get to you. Grief is hard to deal with, and different for everyone. The name you picked is lovely.

Married2MrWright

Marina is a great middle name and nice way to honor your father.  Sounds to me like you mom has another issue.  Maybe the fact that you're not naming your daughter after her?  I would talk to her about it and see what's up.