kmgourley - Did we marry the same man?

babyluv617

If your DH is anything like mine, though, this will all be in vain.  He will tell you that you are crazy and not the person you married and that if you were to absolutely insist on a homebirth, he would think about divorce.  And that will make you sad.  But you will know that he only says it because he's afraid you'll die (because you "needed' pitocin after the birth of your first, according to the drs. & he won't let it go or understand that midwives carry pitocin, too).  And then you will end up with a hospital birth.

 

THIS IS HIS PROBLEM!

kmgourley

I know I'm Mormon and all but I didn't think my husband practiced polygamy!

I'm sorry, though   Truly.  I wish we could both have the births at home we want.  I know that's not the case for me, but maybe your DH is slightly less stubborn than mine.  It took some serious convincing for him to ok me delivering at the hospital that's 15 min. away (and allows waterbirth and is natural birth-friendly) instead of 5 with a midwife instead of a doctor!

babyluv617

The biggest problem is that I'd be ok with a birth center, but we don't have one. We don't even have a midwife to go to that delivers in hospital settings. I want to talk to this woman I found and figure out if she knows more info than I do.

I'm kind of second guessing because if something happened that I would need to go to the hospital, I am not a fan of the closest one.

kmgourley

Yeah, we don't have a birth center either.  I suppose I am lucky to have 2 nearby midwives that would deliver at home if the politics were different here, so they have the same mentality as me.

I think meeting with the midwife is a good idea.  It's free and I'm sure she'll have lots of info for you.  As for a transfer... I read somewhere, I think, that only 10% of homebirth require a transfer, or something like that, and half of those are because the mom decides she can't do it w/o meds (to be fair, it could be because she's been in labor for days, which would be trying for anyone!).  You could ask the midwife what her transfer rate is, but of course, no one can predict a cord prolapse or something equally as emergent.  Something I read once said that the policies or attitudes towards birth at the hospital you'd transfer to aren't really important because most of the time, if it comes to that, you need interventions anyway.  I guess it depends on the situation. 

Anywayyyy... just my thoughts

babyluv617

kmgourley:

Something I read once said that the policies or attitudes towards birth at the hospital you'd transfer to aren't really important because most of the time, if it comes to that, you need interventions anyway.  I guess it depends on the situation. 

I'm on the same page, thinking the same. Last time, my labor was 18 hours and was med free, so I think it could be similar next time. I guess you never know. You're right that it can't hurt to meet with her.