NBR: Argument with my Dad vent (long)
Not sure if anyone remembers, but my sister is in Africa for a mission trip with her church. She left June 15th and will be gone til August 5th. Well when she left my Dad let her take my sister cell phone which is a blackberry and hooked up the internet so she could email. Well, I love my sister but she really isn't responsible all the time (she is 18, so I know that's normal lol) and I was worried about the charges my Dad would rack up. Mainly because I would be the one he called when he got that $2000 bill for her texting and calling from Africa.
Well she has been gone almost 3 weeks now and we talk a lot. She also emails my Dad through his email and myspace. Everytime my Dad calls me, the first thing out of his mouth is, "How's G, Have you talked to G," or "When was the last time you talked to G" Then sometimes he will ask how I am or keep talking about my sister. Yesterday he called to complain about how she is texting while in Africa and has 4 text each week she has been gone for about $16-$20 total. What I really wanted to say was, "Duh! I told you so. But you are the genius that gave her the phone to take in the first place, " but I didn't.
So today I get a text from my Dad saying, "Have you talked to G lately" because he wanted me to email her about the whole phone thing etc. Honestly I am sick of being the middle person. I don't mind letting him know how things are with her, but I shouldn't have to be her keeper. Plus he doesn't really check in with me to see how I am, he just wants my advice about her or my other sister or about his work. And granted this is something I have already talked to him about before. My Dad and I have a "best friend" relationship. I am his best friend and since I had to grow up at age 10 to take care of my sisters because he was suffering from depression, I also somehow give him parenting advice.
Well today was the last starw, so I text him back something about how I hadn't talked to her then sent him another message saying, "BTW, I am doing fine thanks 
" I know that probably comes across pretty rude, I just couldn't take it anymore. Of course he called me and we started talking. I told him how I felt, and that although I enjoy talking to my sister and letting him know how she is, I don't like the fact that he doesn't ever call just to talk to me or see how I am doing. And I told him, how I know he is stressed with the phone stuff and his work, but that I just can't be in the middle anymore. He then screamed at me, told me I was overacting, and that it's only been this way since she has been in Africa. (Like I said before, this is an on going issue with my Dad.)
So, needless to say I haven't really talked to him for the rest of the night. I am really proud of myself for standing up saying something to him, but I don't see it getting any better right now. I am just going to try and stick by my beliefs in keeping my boundaries with my Dad. Because honestly I don't need the added stress of other things when I have my own family and now a new baby on the way. Thankfully my Mom helped me out and talked to me, but I am just still really annoyed with things.
Sorry ladies for the long vent. Somehow posting here always makes me feel so much better. And I am not really looking for a response, because I know this is long, just freeing my shoulders of this right now. Thx.
Re: NBR: Argument with my Dad vent (long)
Thanks ladies. Like I said before it always just feels good to just vent on here. Someone it makes me feel better and it feels like a big weight is lifted off my shoulders.
Bekah, you are right about the "only doing what I can handle" right now. Taking care of myself and my family is hard enough. I don't know what I would do if I was having a baby, and didn't have DH to help take care of things.
June, I agree with you too. I do take it as a compliment, it's just hard when I am always the middle person.
But thanks again for letting me vent. You guys are great!