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Will you tell your kids? I've been wondering about this. I have (and still do on occasion) and I know that my parents did. When I was a teenager I asked and they said they had. I think I will probably be honest with Alexis about that, but only if she asks. I don't think I would ever admit to anything else though.
i don't think knowing the truth from my parents was any kind of approval for me, they did not approve, but it was nice to know that I could talk to them honestly.
Re: If you ever smoke(d) pot...
Hmmm... very good question...
I have done it, but I can count the times I have on my fingers. I don't mind that other people do- but it's not my thing. Brings me down (makes me sleepy and just blah)- I rather drink and be festive. ;-) I guess if Nadia asks, I'd just be honest. If she's really curious- she's going to do it regardless of what I say. Atleast if I'm open to the conversation- then maybe it won't happen behind my back...
I did in college, but the last time was like, 8 years ago! i would probably tell her that i did it in college, but it's not appropriate to continue doing so as an adult. Especially now the way companies drug test everyone. I don't see the point in lying about it, but i wouldn't exactly condone it either.
DH and I have talked about this and I think it's something we both want to be honest about. If she's curious about it, she's going to try to do it regardless. I'm not going to open the conversation unless I feel like she's already doing drugs or if I find out her friends do.
Oh, and I think that if she does it before she's 18, she'll get the same kind of punishment as if she's found with a pack of cigarettes. I am ok with her smoking in college as long as it doesn't affect her schoolwork or social life (and she does it responsibly and doesn't drive and smoke or go to class or work,e tc.... same as drinking.)
I only tried it once and hated it, so for me it's not an issue. For DH it's a different story. I'm not sure how I feel about the whole thing. I saw an Oprah show on addiction once and there was a man who wrote a book about his son who has turned into a hardcore drug addict. During the course of the show, the man talked about how when his son first started experimenting with pot, and they caught him, he admitted to his son that he had smoked pot as a teen too...he explained that he was trying to relate to him and hoping that his message would resonate more with his son if his son knew he had done it before too.
Well they mentioned on the show that experts are split on what is the best thing to do from a parenting standpoint. It really is a double-edged sword. On one hand, if your teen knows that you yourself smoked pot and everything turned out a-ok with your life, then there's no deterrence for them. They figure they can do it too and everything will be just fine because if you did and you turned out fine, it won't be a problem for them either. The thing with that is that every individual is different, and I truly believe from personal experience and observing things with family members and friends, that some people are more easily susceptible to addiction than others. So yeah, while DH did his share of experimenting and still turned into a perfectly responsible, well-adjusted adult (as do most people who smoke or smoked pot), there's a chance that one of our children may not be that lucky and the experimenting could have a different, more negative outcome for them. The other side of the coin is that if you DON'T admit to your kids that you tried drugs, they will feel like they can't relate to you at all and like you must not know what you're talking about when it comes to that area, so they are less likely to follow your advice about it.
I don't really know how I feel at this point. I guess we'll see when the time comes how we handle it. I'm guessing it will be more DH's call than mine because he's the one with the personal experience. I just think it's so touchy, and like someone mentioned, where do you draw the line? If you admit to pot, what if they ask about other drugs? What if they ask you how often you did it? etc. Yikes I'm glad we still have plenty of time before we have to open that can of worms.
you did????? lol i'm shocked!! :-D
Dh and I never tried it. I still plan on being very open with our children, but I would hope they wouldn't show any interest in alcohol, smoking or drugs. I never did.
I agree. I smoked pot a few times in my late teens and early twenties, but I don't think its something an adult, especially a mother, should do or be proud of. Sorry, just my two cents.