TTC after 35

"I hope you didn't wait too long...

to try & have a baby-they say when you turn 35 your eggs start to diminish."

This is what one of our secretaries said to me yesterday...in the context of "I really want you to get pregnant, you're going to be such a good mom, BUT..."

Seriously?!?!?!?

I asked her how she thought that made me feel and if she thought that helped me at all...

Then I walked away...far, far away...

Re: "I hope you didn't wait too long...

  • I was getting a manicure one day and the dude doing it said pretty much the same thing to me.  I wanted to kick him in the b@lls.  He then redeemed himself by asking 'so you're 27 right?' 

     

    I'm glad you said something to this person. Good for you!

  • Yeah, I'm glad you said something too.  It was a good comeback!
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  • Perfect response.

    I get a lot of questions like that, too. Once time someone asked me "So, are you having kids or are you too old?" I  said loudly "Um, what did you just ask me?" but she didn't have the nerve to ask again with coworkers listening.

  • imageColoradoMelissa:

    I asked her how she thought that made me feel and if she thought that helped me at all...

    Then I walked away...far, far away...

    I'll have to remember this.  I think that is a fantastic way to respond.  People really should think before they speak. Ugh.

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  • DochasDochas member
    You, know - it would be a dumb thing to say if it was a friend or family member.  But why is this person even discussing this?  I can't believe how inappropriate some people can be.
    TTC since September '08 After 2 m/c - lap for stage 3-4 endo Oct '09 Bravelle w/Ovidrel trigger - iui on 11/07 Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • You handled that beautifully!
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  • I wish slapping was allowed in the workplace.

    I'm sorry you had to hear her say that.?

  • I hate that comment about 35+ eggs being too old. There are many women who get pg after 35. Not only me but I just found out that two 40-yr old relatives of my husband are pregnant. Granted, one had to do IUI but still. And most of the women in my birthing class were over 35. So keep your chin up ladies, we are not too old to have babies :)
    Me: 44 DH: 42. DS born healthy at 40 weeks 8/24/09. TTC since then with no luck or ART. Surprise BFP 8/6/14... MMC @ 8 weeks 4 days... Miss you everyday sweet baby angel.
  • What a great response! I am so happy you spoke up. 
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  • Excellent comeback!

     

  • Honestly, I don't believe all that about "once you turn 35, blah blah". How in the world could anybody possibly pinpoint that? Think about it? All they have to go on is statistics...I try to stay positive but also be realistic, meaning, I think it will happen for all of us, it just takes some longer than others, and that can happen at any age. And, yes I know that as we get older, our bodies do slow down, our eggs age, etc.

     I love your comeback. That's great!

  • very proud of you and hate that people can't keep comments to themselves.

     

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