Up late cause its driving me crazy...
I just usually read everybodys posts to help remind me that I'm not the only one... but this time I need to write.
My FI has talked to his son 8 times in the last month (he called everyday since we live states away). We don't currently have money to get a lawyer and go to court to get the CO adjusted for the move. She goes back and forth from telling him not to call and whining about how he won't talk to her.
They have been divorced three years and she still lives with her parents. No job. No school. According to her friends CS goes to her french manicure. For Fathers Day he got a "Happy Fathers Day Daddy" then she got on the phone and said he didn't want to talk.
It really got to me earlier today when I saw on a mutual friends facebook she was talking about how well we all got along. How his mom still wants her to be a part of the family. And how they invited her over to their pool to swim.
His mom can't stand her but it does turn out that she did invite her to the pool. Now this really offends me. Only because BM is so nasty to their son but they are so nice to her. Mom says she is only nice so she can see her grandson. Great... but is it wrong for me to be mad that she isn't standing up for her actual SON? A simple "David really wants to talk to Daven... could you have him call?"
Nope. Nothing. Ever.
Re: Up late cause its driving me crazy...
Sorry but your out of line here. Your DH is a big boy and his mommy certainly should not be fighting his battles for him OR interfering in his business. Of course she wants to see her grandson and hang out with him, but he is a child and so he comes with a parent. I bet your MIL can't wait for the day that he can come to the pool or hangout by himself but for now she needs to bite her tongue and 'play' nice for the sake of her grandson.
My Fi has 10 nieces & nephews so almost once a month there is a bday party. Sometimes Fi and I choose not to attend or cant due to work etc. So they invite SS and BM takes him. They all get along with her BUT I?m sure they would prefer Fi to be there with SS. Either way it doesn?t bother me because she is no threat to me.
Also I think it is very petty that you discuss with your friends what she spends CS on. You need to stop trashing her to people; she is your SS's mother.
Sorry hun but the best advice I can offer is.... Grow up.
In my heart I know I am being unreasonable about MIL but I just needed to hear opinions and others experiences. Guess its all part of "trying to get over it", huh?
BTW, he does call everyday to try and talk to Daven. And I have been helping him for three months with documentation (good, bad, everything).
Thanks all.
I think you are out of line and here is why. I don't think you understand the fine line the your FMIL has to walk in order to be apart of her grandchild's life.
I am in this exact situation except I am the BM with a 9 y.o. If it wasn't for me, her grandparents would never see her because her father doesn't want anything to do with her. I have been taking her to their home every summer since she was born and since she was two she stay with them for a month during the summer.
I am sure that my daughter's BD and SM wish I didn't do this but I refuse to allow my duaghter to miss out on the love that her grandparents have to give because her father and step-mother don't like it.
Your FI is a big boy and if he wants more time with his child then he needs to take mom to court. In most court you can file and represent yourself.
Your FMIL has the right to handle this relationship in the manner that she sees fit so that she can continue to enjoy her grandchild.