s/o crazy lady

two-pink-shoes

Are you going to spank your kids?  If not, how will you discipline them?

CMDR513

time out.

Anna&Matt

no. I was never spanked and turned out just fine. We'll punish them by taking away toys, putting them in time out and so on which is just as effective IMO.?

two-pink-shoes

I won't spank.  I don't believe it teaches the right lesson and I think there's a lot of potential for parents to do it to relieve their own anger instead of to teach.  Also, any sort of attention is reinforcement for kids even if it's not pleasant.  I'll use time-outs.

two-pink-shoes

I'll also take away privileges, etc, esp when they're older.

nlvaden

I will use a multitude of "punishments".  Even so, I will not spank a baby.

greenclown

Time out.

Thusadeedoo

Time out = 1 minute per year old they are.

Also, as they get older depending on what they are doing wrong I will discipline with the idea that I am teaching them a lesson of the importance of what they did/didn't do.

nikisnow

I don't want to ever hit my kids.  I was spanked...well actually beaten is a better word, and I don't want to raise my kids in that kind of environment. 

giaM28

spanking a baby...never. an older child maybe. i was spanked and it worked a hell of a lot better than taking away TV, play time etc. i never brused from being spanked and i think it only happened once or twice. I listened more. My older sister for expample would listen  more when her  privliges got taken away. it depends on the kid IMO. i also think there is a BOLD line between spanking and abuse.

ETA: i dont have kids now so this is what i think i might do. it can all change

two-pink-shoes

My parents spanked me and I don't hold it against them b/c they did it very well (i.e., give me a 30 minute lecture about why it was happening etc, never out of anger), but I don't want to do it anyway.  I honestly don't trust myself that much.

LucyAnnie

Thusadeedoo:

Time out = 1 minute per year old they are.

Also, as they get older depending on what they are doing wrong I will discipline with the idea that I am teaching them a lesson of the importance of what they did/didn't do.

This.  Spanking does not teach the child what he or did or didn't do that was wrong.  Spanking will teach the child fear, and while I want my children to respect me, I don't want them to fear me.   I want to teach them the importance of being  a good person and the rewards that can come of that. 

FWIW:  I was spanked. I turned out just fine, but I have heard of too many cases of spanking going wrong.  So I cannot guarantee my child (dependent on age) will never get a swat on the butt, but spanking is not going to me my method of disipline.  

newbie425

two-pink-shoes:

I won't spank.? I don't believe it teaches the right lesson and I think there's a lot of potential for parents to do it to relieve their own anger instead of to teach.? Also, any sort of attention is?reinforcement for kids even if it's not pleasant.? I'll use time-outs.

This and I will use time-outs only when they are really missing something?reinforcing, otherwise, It won't be very effective.?

mmk3742

I will mainly use time-outs, taking away toys/ privelages.  That is mainly what my parents did with me.  I occasionally got spanked growing up, but only for very serious offenses. 

I can say if my kids get spanked at all, it would only be for very serious things.  And not ever until they were older.

easjer05

I won't rule it out, but it is never a first resort, and I think there is a very limited age where it is effective.  I think clear boundaries and time outs/loss of privileges are far more effective than spanking.  But I also think some kids get the message better through spanking.  It's a case by case sort of thing, you know?

starsmaycollide

two-pink-shoes:

I won't spank.  I don't believe it teaches the right lesson and I think there's a lot of potential for parents to do it to relieve their own anger instead of to teach.  Also, any sort of attention is reinforcement for kids even if it's not pleasant.  I'll use time-outs.

this. I absolutely think it works if used consistently, and much better than spanking. 

MakingBabyWasFun

easjer05:

I won't rule it out, but it is never a first resort, and I think there is a very limited age where it is effective.  I think clear boundaries and time outs/loss of privileges are far more effective than spanking.  But I also think some kids get the message better through spanking.  It's a case by case sort of thing, you know?

This for me.  I agree not a first resort.  But I was a crappy kid and I was one of those that really only learned through spanking.  Works on some, not on others.  My younger brother was one of those for whom spanking didn't work, so my parents didn't do it after a while.  My older brother was a shiithead like me, so he got spanked and the belt.  Worked well on him, and now he punishes my nephews the same way.  I've seen them with him.  Abuse breeds fear, and I can tell they don't fear him, but they do respect him.  They're a loving family.  I guess I'm just a bit more old fashioned that way.

 

swimrbride

No spanking here. I am all for time outs and taking away privilages.

oh-zysbaby

I think the best use for spanking is a quick swat in a dangerous situation...running across the street, scissors in the outlet, etc. Something where a fast and serious message needs to be sent that this is somehow different from all of the other trouble you get in all damn day long.

That being said, I didn't do much of it with DD and I probably won't with her brother either. I think she got a flick on the hand sometimes.