Sleep help (long and full of complaining)

JRS72206

For almost four weeks now Isabelle has been waking up at night. Some nights are good with only her only waking once (which is FINE-she will eat and go right back to sleep), but most nights she wakes 4-5 times or every 2-3 hrs. I don't know what is going on. She used to sleep all night long from 9:00-6:00 then go back down till 9:00 again. I get that shes older and needs less sleep at night, but what is the deal with all this waking up??? She does get 10-11 hrs at night but lots of waking. It doesn't seem like shes hungry as all she needs is comforting most times. Is she not eating enough dinner? Is it my supply and she needs to eat at night to make up for it? Teething? She has no other signs. She's still a napping champ and usually takes two long (1.5-3hrs) naps a day, but night time is just poo. Sometimes I'll go in after shes been whining for 5mins or so and her eyes are closed but shes making noise. (almost crying in her sleep) So i pick her up and rock her. She always goes right back down, but I still have to get out of bed and rock or feed her. So then I'm up and have a hard time falling back asleep. I can't keep waking up this often. I'm always tired which makes me grumpy, which makes me a crappy wife/mommy/friend.

Thoughts? Is it time for Ferber during the night? Is there some sort of 7-8 month wakeful? I'm a newbie and need help from all you veteran moms. 

Sorry this is all over the place. I'm sleepy. 

babyaustin725

Is she coming close to a new mobility milestone?  Crawling, standing, etc.?  I have heard that this will often disrupt their sleep.  Just grasping.

I'm sorry you are dealing with this.  I've been woken up in the middle of the night just once two nights in a row and I'm wiped. 

Good luck.

Jas*sGirl

Is she a paci girl?  I know I just told this to Heather and I promise I am not pushing pacis, but you gotta do what you gotta do.  HAHA  When Ads started to wake in the night one tired night I went in and just put her paci in...did not pick her up or anything...OUT she went.  So once we figured the paci trick we unswaddled her and she would put her own paci in.  She still wakes up in the night, but now knows to grab her paci and self sooth herself back to sleep.  It might be something to try.  It does not sound like she is wide awake at night just needing a little something to get back to sleep.

AnnetteWalker

If she is not fully awake I would not go in at all and see if she will go back to sleep on her own. Or you could just go in and rub her back or just touch her but not pick her up. Right about that age is when we would let DS cry for a bit before we just went in. As long as she is eating dinner well and nursing ok then I would think she just needs to learn to self sooth back to sleep.

Seattle_JiLLn

this is a very normal time for a sleep regression.   They're going through a lot developmentally.   Learning to crawl or pull up and things like that.  And becoming more aware of the world around them.  And the idea of object permanence can play into some separation anxiety and needing to just "check in" with you.

I would say invest in a video monitor so you can look and see if she really needs you or not.  She might go back to sleep on her own in those situations.   Ben often wakes up, moans a little bit, even sits up or stands up, and then flops back down and goes to sleep.    Or try just going in and rubbing her back/tummy and see if she can jsut calm back down to sleep.  She might be having bad dreams too.  Or it could be teeth or growing pains.  You could try giving her some tylenol before bed to see if it helps.

I will say that Ben STTN from 3-6 months and then abruptly stopped.  Nothing I could think of to fix it.  And it took a long time to get better.  But it did get better.  You just have to figure out a plan for coping.  For us, it was sleeping with him starting at 3 or 4AM - we'd both get 4 or 5 good solid housrs of sleep together in the guest room.  He just needed his mommy.  And it made me bearable for the day as well. 

There's a book (and a blog) called Bed Timing, and it will say that 8-9 months is a really bad time to try to make sleep changes or do sleep training.   The philosophy in that book is that there are developmental things going on and stages that make things easier/harder to do sleep changes.  

So my advice would be to gut it out, try to give her a little longer to self-soothe and see if she can, and enlist the help of DH.  And just figure out a plan to cope.  It won't last forever.  I promise.

blueLu25

It probably has a lot to do with the fact that she just started crawling, etc, but this is the exact situation that led us to Ferber. Our dr. told us to try it since Ollie was old enough to sleep thru the night. He was just USED to getting up a couple times a night, he didnt NEED to, though. And since we would always be there at every little noise, he hadnt learned to self-soothe, and get himself back to sleep when he would wake up.

It has really helped sooo much. The first couple nights are hard, more for the parents than baby, really, so if you are going to do Ferber, do it when Brent is going to be home. Also, I have the book if you want to borrow it Good luck, hope things get better!! Call me if you want  

Seattle_JiLLn

Does she fall asleep on her own, or do you put her down asleep?  I will say one thing that felt like it worked for us - although Ben was older - was getting him to fall asleep on his own.  I think that then he was able to learn to self soothe back to sleep as well.  And we did it without any CIO.  Just patience - sigh....  I started by putting him down drowsy and standing by the crib rubbing his back and shushing.   Then laying by the crib ont he floor and shushing, but no touching him.  Then moving farther and farther away til I was out of the room.  ANd then I could just say "night night" and leave. 

JRS72206

Seattle_JiLLn:

Does she fall asleep on her own, or do you put her down asleep?  I will say one thing that felt like it worked for us - although Ben was older - was getting him to fall asleep on his own.  I think that then he was able to learn to self soothe back to sleep as well.  And we did it without any CIO.  Just patience - sigh....  I started by putting him down drowsy and standing by the crib rubbing his back and shushing.   Then laying by the crib ont he floor and shushing, but no touching him.  Then moving farther and farther away til I was out of the room.  ANd then I could just say "night night" and leave. 

She will put herself to sleep. Not every night, but if shes still awake after nursing I can lay her down, say "night night" and she will go to sleep. Both for bedtime and naps. 

It sounds like I need to give her a few more mins before I go in at night. The problem is that I wake up either way so it seems easier to just go in, but I know that won't fix anything. I need to be a tougher mommy. 

Seattle_JiLLn

Yeah, I used to just sit there watching the monitor til he fell asleep but now I can just close my eyes and go back to sleep, figuring he'll actually yell if he needs me.  I also turned my monitor down a lot so I'm not disturbed by little moans and whimpers.

IdahoGirl

I actually bought the book that Jill is talking about from Amazon.ca (the couple that wrote it are Canadian) and it talks quite a bit about the changes that happen in the 8 - 12 month stage.

You might want to check out their blog:   https://bedtiming.typepad.com/bed-timing/

There can definately be sleep regression at that point - which is what it sounds like you're going thru.

And from my own personal experience with Miss M, I am so sorry you're going through this

pinktulips

I was just talking to a friend today about sleep and she said that her pedi warned her when her ds reached 8 months that his sleep patterns may go wacko for a bit.

KNemo

I have no advice for you, but I wanted to extend the sympathy hand to you Justine....that sucks! I hope that you and baby Belle get some sleep soon!!