What I am having trouble with
First off let me say that Carol is great with Annie.
That said... on to my own issue. I am having trouble letting her be mom sometimes. It sounds awful to say, but part of me feels like noone understands Annie like me. I know Carol loves her and will protect her and care for her with her whole heart and soul, but after carrying her for nine months I don't 100% feel ready to share.
Its just little things. Like how we respond to her when she is crying. I know she isn't doing things wrong, but its hard for me not to step in when she doesn't do things the way I would do them.
Does anyone else go through this? It makes me feel very selfish and mean. I haven't been like this before. I guess it is just one of those things that changes when you have children.
I don't even know if this post makes any sense, but it was jsut something I needed to get out. Thanks for reading if you made it through my whining post. 
)
~Kennedy
Re: What I am having trouble with
ok, you are so normal. this happens a lot--to a lot of different couples, gay and straight. i'm sure that it will happen to us to some extent, too. i know from the other side of things that i get little pangs of jealousy periodically that i don't get to carry this baby we're waiting for, and i'm not getting to experience the things that my wife is. i won't feel that first kick the same way she will.
no one does understand annie like you--but no one understands annie like carol does, either. you're not selfish and mean, you're protective of your child. maybe next time she's comforting anni you could try going for a walk around the block to give her the chance to handle it on her own. i'm sure other people will have suggestions, too. you'll figure out ways to make things work for you.
I understand. Since I am home with them all day I used to have a hard time stepping away or biting my tongue.
It does get easier, I promise!
S and I have a nice routine and flow going now. We may do things differently but we are consistent where it counts and are better about "sharing" the baby :-)
I totally understand. W and I have a tendency to micromanage each other. It's something we have been working on long before Maggie. But it has come up in a big way since she was born. We are both so madly in love with her and want the best for her, and sometimes think our way is "the way." As time goes on though we have slowly been able to develop our own relationships with her and to trust each other's way more --- definitely an ongoing effort. Taking a step back and trying to just watch them with an objective eye has really helped me see what an amazing parent W is!
We've run into this too - but probably moreso as they got older (in the beginning I welcomed any help out there - but that was due to having 2 babies and crazy PPD!)
Of course we talked about discipline, etc before the boys - and after - but situations arise that we could have never dreamed of and if one of us there and needs to react, we do. And sometimes it isn't the same as what the other of us would do. That can be hard.
I read a study somewhere that biological mothers and non biological mothers actually hear their baby's cries differently. It had nothing to do with bonding - but something about horomones that are released in the biolgocal mother's body. Might explain why my wife NEVER hears our child in the middle of the night.