SIL had a m/c. Very sad. :-( Is there anything I can do?

summerbrideDC

AND after the went to the hospital b/c of the m/c, they admitted her b/c she also had pneumonia. ?Talk about insult to injury. ?I feel so badly for her. ?

We live 2000 miles from SIL and BIL, but I want to do something for her to let her know we're thinking of her. ?Any ideas that are thoughtful but not oppressive or too mournful??

LinzDavid

Dinner delivery service?

dnagal

A pajama-gram? 

A hickory farms or Harry and David delivery of yummy treats.

 

UBMyBaby

Sorry to hear that.  Everyone is different, but when I had my m/c, I received a really beautiful bouquet of flowers with these little butterflies on ting ting ( I think that's what it's called--they are long spiral reeds for decoration).  Normally, I think flowers are pretty and I like them.  But when I got this, for this occasion, it was powerful for me for some reason. I stared at them and really appreciated their beauty at a time when everything felt ugly. I even saved the little butterfly ting ting pieces and have then in a house plant as a little reminder.

I was one who didn't want people dwelling but appreciated it being acknowledged.  Hugs to your family.

Heidisean

Unfortunately, I will speak from experience. Don't send flowers because that made me even more sad when they died. My bff sent me a lottery ticket cake and that was awesome. It gave me time to sit and scratch tickets off and take my mind off of the mc. I also liked the edible arragement that was sent to me. OR send a card with a boat load of scratch off lottery tickets. That would be really nice to send her something. It made me feel good when people acknowledged my losses. How far along was she?

summerbrideDC

thanks, ladies. ?She had to be close to 8 weeks; she announced to the family that she was pregnant almost a month ago.?

Heidisean

summerbrideDC:

thanks, ladies.  She had to be close to 8 weeks; she announced to the family that she was pregnant almost a month ago.

Awh! She got a double whammy. I do like the pajama gram idea too!

Jen2124

...or one of those yummy fruit bouquets! (but i love fruit). Edible Arrangments, I think it's called?

kittycarr

Is there anything I can do over this way for them?  They're over here, right?

summerbrideDC

No, Kitty; they're in Nashville, Tennessee.

Twink13

i'm so very sorry! how about a spa gc or house cleaning or food service gc. just something so she can relax for a bit and not worry about everyday stresses of life.

really though the best thing is just to let her know how much you guys love her and are thinking of her.

best wishes.

squishywife

when i miscarried i loved the chocolate covered pretzels and treats people sent.  1.  i love treats 2. flowers weren't helping anything

((HUGS))

also, i didnt want to talk to anyone so i didnt answer the phone if anyone called.

sarahjared

Ok, I think I am in the minority here but when I mc I didn't want anything.  Someone sent me a card and it kind of irritated me because I didn't want to be reminded of the loss (if that makes sense).  If anyone sent other stuff, every time I saw it I thought about how the only reason I had it was because my baby died.  Then I was upset to a whole new level.  It wasn't that I didn't appreciate the thought but I just wanted to grieve alone.  It was kind of like if someone sent something then the mc was real (I know it was real but I hope someone knows what I mean).  I didn't even want DH around me much.  I think the best thing that you can do is listen if they want to talk about it.  Otherwise I would leave it alone.

GrowingFamily

Ditto what the pp said about flowers.  They made me angry every time I looked at them.  I would think "I should have a baby NOT some darn stupid FLOWERS sitting on my table!"  I would suggest something that is edible, something she can use, but nothing that just sits there for her to look at...

mamarazzi

A nice card and a treat.  I like the pajama-gram idea, too.  Or how about a dinner gift card and a movie theater certificate so she and her H can go on a date? 

Don't do flowers.  I was so upset when my flowers died -- it just reminded me of my baby dying.