Only one babyshower?

Times2

My husband said someone told him that people only throw you a baby shower for your 1st pregnancy...is this true?

franciscaz

Ettiquette wise it is very true.  In fact 2nd showers are sort of a faux paux still unless there is a huge difference between children (like 5 or 10 yrs), new spouse, etc. Part of me thinks multiples falls under the extreme circumstances loop hole.

I've been offered a shower and I am divided.  Part of me thinks I should go for it since there are 2 this time and one is a girl... but I feel guilty b/c all the invitees would be the same group of people (it was co-ed) that were invited less than 2 yrs ago to Harm's.  It does feel a bit shameless.  I dunno what to do... interested on others opinions here.

jasonlovessara

I think it is a big no no to have two showers... I know i would not go to a shower for someone who just had one a couple of years ago.  I know some ladies on this board have had a "Sprinkle" where I think it is a much smaller baby shower... i.e. clothing or little things, no big ticket items.  From what I have gathered a Sprinkle is for a smaller group of close people.  I think that would be okay... this is all just my opinion.

Times2

 oh wow it is true... i guess its a good that im having twins for my 1st pregnancy! ;-)

mandy1383

This is the on-going debate with my IL's. ?My SIL is pregnant with her 2nd and will be having another shower and where she lives this is completely normal and acceptable. ?If I were to have another shower people around where I live would freak out at me and say that it's completely distasteful. ?And IMO I agree that a 2nd shower is just greedy. ?But my IL's totally don't get why it's a bad thing.

Temp6313048411121614

I would love a 2nd shower because if we're all honest, everyone loves presents, but I would decline one if someone offered.  My mom discussed with me having a luncheon to celebrate the baby (so a shower w/o the gifts).  After finding out we were having twins she was saying something about maybe doing a small shower, and I said no thank you at that point.  If she brings it up again I was thinking maybe we could have a diaper raffle at a luncheon and people could bring a package if diapers IF THEY WANTED for a chance to win some sort of prize.  I do think that it should be acceptable to have a shower for every baby (and in some regions it is), but it isn't (here) and we still have most things we'll need.

janjag

it is true.  i do like pp's suggestions of a sprinkle (with a small, close group), or a meet the babies party.  but i wouldn't register for gifts for either! 

 

Kim777

I agree it can vary based on where you live. It seems to be fairly split here. Some people do and some people don't. I am having a shower because a really sweet friend offered. It is more of a "sprinkle" as well. I registered at BRU to get my completion discount, but it is all small stuff and there was no registry info given out to my invitees at all. I suspect I will get lots of matching/coordinating outfits, which people would have sent/brought over whether we had the shower or not. It is really just to have a chance to get close friends/family together to celebrate the babies. I was definitely torn about doing it though. I only invited people I knew wouldn't be offended.

franciscaz

Oh it is soooo good to hear opinions!  I think I will stick to my instinct and decline.  I registered for the completion but only DH and I know I am registered.  I couldn't imagine going "and we are registered at so and so a place" to anyone!

mommode

Most of my girlfriends and family members have had one large shower with their first pregnancy.  The 2nd time around is has jsut bee a small gathering of close friends and family.

mandy1383

I'm liking the idea of a gift optional?sprinkle. ?I may mention that if my mom brings up a shower again, but I won't ask.