I suck at being a mom of two

Hooray2005

DS watches way more TV than he should, the house is a mess, I'm exhausted and verging on mom-hag status, I raise my voice with my son more often than I'd like to admit, it took us until Noon today to get out of the house, and I'm currently nesting for ten minutes instead of playing with my infant.  Most of this wasn't the case when I just had one kiddo. 

 I feel like I'm simply trying to survive my life, and I'm certainly not the mother I imagined I would be.  Bleh...

JOEBunny

Join the club.  I do ok most days, as long as nothing goes "wrong".  Today, I have a fever of 101 and a non stop runny nose and a super whiny, over tired 2.95 year old who will not stop touching me.  I can't wait for my DH to get home so I can get in bed and die. 

breezee_bean

--hugs--

I can totally understand!  It does get alot better. 

CubbyMama

Everything you listed applies to me, too!  Most of the time, though, I try not to be too hard on myself about it.  I now understand why my mom yelled more than she probably intended and why she was so stressed when we were kids: she was 23 and had three of us!  I'm trying to enjoy this as much as I can, b/c I know how fast time flies and I know that I'd want this time back again if I "wasted" it stressing over everything.  Just try to list your priorities and recognize what's not important (i.e. having your bed made or your kitchen spotless) compared to what is. 

And, FWIW, there is research that shows kids under 5 can benefit from TV as long as it's somewhat educational (meaning, I guess, Noggin and PBS vs. Spongebob 24/7?  I'm not sure) and as long as they still get plenty of attention, experiences, and interaction with peers and adults.  I cling to that when I realize DD has watched 2 hours of Dora and the day is only half over, and try to make up for it on other days when we're out of the house and the TV is off most or all of the day.

Another piece of advice I really try to follow is to talk to yourself the way you would talk to a friend.  If someone on here had posted what you just did, would you reply and tell them they're clearly a crappy mom and ruining their children's lives?  Or would you say that it's normal to feel that way, everyone's human, things will get better....etc.?  Be nice to yourself.

mollynpatrick

Me too! Erin is so much more challenging than I remember Evan being at this age. I am hating how my relationship with Evan is changing and I sometimes feel resentful towards my poor, sweet baby girl :-( I can't believe that I thought I could handle a third in a few years. That plan is being seriously re-evaluated. Oh - my parents live about three minutes from me and we see them every single day. I don't think I could possibly have more help (unless we had a live in nanny or something) and I still feel like some days I am wishing the days away until my infant is no longer an infant. Give me a toddler any day! :-(

mollynpatrick

Cubby, you rock! I always read your posts and wish that I could have said what you said! I'm usually thinking it - I just don't say it nearly as well as you do! Or....I just take the opportunity to complain about my own situation and completely forget to say anything uplifting at all. :-)

Kapalua

I could have written this...so I have nothing but ((hugs))

camrude

I could've written this post. People say it gets better. I'm praying it does.

roxy_jj

I could have written your post!

I didn't realize how easy it was when I only had one. 

cmw&tdm

It will get better.  Many moms of two have told me that I will be going through that soon and to just let it go and things will eventually go back to normal.  Give yourself some slack, you're doing great!

Ms.E

That pretty much describes my last 2 years, but things have really started getting better the last 3 months.  I see the light at the end of the tunnel.  Hang in there!

Evil Widgets

It does get better.  There are still days if one of my kids is ornery..its rough.  But there are other days I feel like super mom, we do projects, clean the house, run errands, sit and learn together..and are all happy..but not everyday is that way, neither they nor I feel like having those days all the time. 

You still have an infant..so you aren't going to be in a total routine anytime soon.  But..what does help me..is I have a dry erase board on my refridgerator and I will write 1 thing I want to get done that day..if I do it Horray!  Some days..its simple and easy ' Bake Bread'..some days its more difficult.