Parenting

Would this tick you off?

DH just called and said he has to go to California for almost 2 weeks next month. Then, his boss told him the second week would be a "light schedule" so he could take a few days off and bring his family.  So, DH is proposing that we all fly to LA, spend 5 days there while he works, then drive to the Bay area and see his family for 4 days. Then DS and I would fly home and DH would drive back to LA, work another couple days and come home.

So I ask why he needs to go to LA in the first place if he can take that much time off.  The answer -- it's a boondoggle. He doesn't NEED to be in LA at all after the first few days, but his boss thinks it will be fun.

So, he wants to spend around $2K for DS and I to fly there, for all of us to stay in a hotel in San Francisco, and for meals and stuff. DS and I would have to amuse ourselves in the hotel in a little town near LA for 5 days, which sounds like NO fun to me. I don't mind visiting his family, but this sounds like a PITA trip except for seeing his family. The last time we went to CA, DS never adjusted to the time change and would get up at 5 a.m. everyday and totally melt down by 5 p.m. He would not take a nap. It sucked.

So my choices are go along on this boondoggle and spend a week chasing DS around essentially by myself, or stay home by myself with DS for two weeks. (Yes, I know lots of women stay by themselves with their kids, it's just hard to be a single working parent, and I don't like doing it.)

Re: Would this tick you off?

  • Hmmm. That would be a tough one. If it weren't for seeing his family, I would vote for staying home alone. I despise trying to take care of DS in a hotel. It's the least relaxing thing ever.

    Can you fly out later and just meet him in San Francisco? I know flying with a child alone is never fun.

    imageimage
    Alex (11/14/06) and Nate (5/25/10)
    "Want what you have, do what you can, be who you are." - Rev. Forrest Church
  • I'd stay home. Just remember when you think it's hard to be a single, working parent and it sucks (which it does)  that I do/did it everyday (well, I used to do the work part). Push through it and he'll be back before you know it. Promise.

    edit: I didn't mean to come off flippant and didn't answer your actual question. I'm not sure it would tick me off. But I can understand not wanting to be there and having to entertain ds by yourself. That's the only reason I think I'd choose to stay home.

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  • If it were me, I'd be packing my bags already. What fun!

    As for the time in the hotel, why not explore your environment? Shopping, museums, luncheons... tons of things to do.

    I see this as a great time :)  Travel

  • Well, we really love to travel and taking advantage of DH's business trips is a great way to travel and still save money (since hotel and food are on the company dime. . . and usually he has enough airline points to get us there).

    DD is a great traveler, though. . . it usually only takes her a day or 2 to adjust to a new time zone and she really enjoys the airplane and all the new stuff to do.

    I would go, especially since there's family to visit!

    imageimage Ashley Sawtelle Photography
  • imageIsabella T.:

    If it were me, I'd be packing my bags already. What fun!

    As for the time in the hotel, why not explore your environment? Shopping, museums, luncheons... tons of things to do.

    I see this as a great time :)  Travel

    Here's the deal -- we are going to be in Corona without a car (unless we decide to rent two cars, which just seems ridiculous.) How are we going to explore our environment? If we were actually in LA, it might be fun. There's not much we can walk to from the hotel.

  • can you just fly out for the second half of the trip?  That part sounds like fun!

     

    Nathan 7-13-06 ~ Elizabeth 4-12-09 ~ Zachary 8-5-11
  • There is quite a bit to do in LA, but, yeah, if you're not going to be staying here I'd definitely not be keen on that idea. Nope. I wouldn't do it.

    imageimage
    Alex (11/14/06) and Nate (5/25/10)
    "Want what you have, do what you can, be who you are." - Rev. Forrest Church
  • 4Speedy4Speedy member
    Some people don't mind sight seeing alone, some do.  If it's not your thing, just fly in later for the family part of the trip.  Why don't you fly directly to SF, the go back to LA with your DH for the second part of the trip.  That way you only have two days on your own with DC.  Spend one day at the beach, hook up with SoCal Nesties the other day and then have your DH help you navigate the airport on the way home.  You'll only have one week at home as a single working mom, too.  Sounds like the best of all worlds.
  • It almost sounds like your option is to stay home and be a single parent, or go to a new environment, new schedule, and still be a single parent.  Given the circumstances that you describe, I would opt to stay home. 
  • image4Speedy:
    Some people don't mind sight seeing alone, some do.  If it's not your thing, just fly in later for the family part of the trip.  Why don't you fly directly to SF, the go back to LA with your DH for the second part of the trip.  That way you only have two days on your own with DC.  Spend one day at the beach, hook up with SoCal Nesties the other day and then have your DH help you navigate the airport on the way home.  You'll only have one week at home as a single working mom, too.  Sounds like the best of all worlds.

    Maybe I'll stop in and see SummerBrideDC -- she would LOVE that.  Wink

  • Here's the deal -- we are going to be in Corona without a car (unless we decide to rent two cars, which just seems ridiculous.) How are we going to explore our environment? If we were actually in LA, it might be fun. There's not much we can walk to from the hotel.

    Not sure why renting 2 cars would be ridiculous? Is the company paying for the first one? If money is an issue, then I understand.

    Otherwise, I'd see what options the hotel has. A taxi maybe?

    As I said, if it were me I'd be packing already. But I love adventures like this. If I'm essentially going to be alone either way, then why not get away from the dishes, laundry and chores to have fun?

     

  • imageIsabella T.:
    Here's the deal -- we are going to be in Corona without a car (unless we decide to rent two cars, which just seems ridiculous.) How are we going to explore our environment? If we were actually in LA, it might be fun. There's not much we can walk to from the hotel.

    Not sure why renting 2 cars would be ridiculous? Is the company paying for the first one? If money is an issue, then I understand.

    Otherwise, I'd see what options the hotel has. A taxi maybe?

    As I said, if it were me I'd be packing already. But I love adventures like this. If I'm essentially going to be alone either way, then why not get away from the dishes, laundry and chores to have fun?

     

    Well, there's the money of renting two cars, and the hassle of picking up and dropping them off. I guess we could do it. A taxi is an idea, but I'd have to haul along a car seat for DS wherever we go, which would be a pain.

  • If you can swing renting another car, I'd consider it. There's so much to do around this area and you can even find lots of free activities. I have memberships to a couple of local boards if you want me to refer you. That's how I plan all our activities.
    imageimage
    Alex (11/14/06) and Nate (5/25/10)
    "Want what you have, do what you can, be who you are." - Rev. Forrest Church
  • Would you H need the car all day? Maybe you could get up and drop him off and then have the car for the rest of the day or he could take a taxi to work.

     

  • imagefemmegem:
    If you can swing renting another car, I'd consider it. There's so much to do around this area and you can even find lots of free activities. I have memberships to a couple of local boards if you want me to refer you. That's how I plan all our activities.

    Do you know what there is to do/see in Corona?

  • I actually have no idea about Corona. I'd page EMT or one of the people who grew up around here and ask. I was talking about stuff to do in LA, but with traffic the way it is around here and how far out Corona is that might not be an option.

    Page EMT. She grew up around Anaheim, which isn't too far from Corona. She might have some thoughts on whether you could find fun stuff to do around there.

    imageimage
    Alex (11/14/06) and Nate (5/25/10)
    "Want what you have, do what you can, be who you are." - Rev. Forrest Church
  • imagefemmegem:

    I actually have no idea about Corona. I'd page EMT or one of the people who grew up around here and ask. I was talking about stuff to do in LA, but with traffic the way it is around here and how far out Corona is that might not be an option.

    Page EMT. She grew up around Anaheim, which isn't too far from Corona. She might have some thoughts on whether you could find fun stuff to do around there.

    How far is Corona from LA?

  • I would either go & stay with his family to save money (also depends on your relationship with them) or I wouldn't go at all.  I hate travelling alone, but if I would have to do it alone with a child & all of their stuff, that's a double NO.  I'd rather stay home with the child than spend a week in a hotel.  It's no fun staying in a hotel with a toddler. Can you talk him into just going for the time he needs to be there for business?
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  • I like going on trips...esp. to CA, so I think it would be fun.?

    I tried to come up with a better answer, but I just can't get past the fact that you used the word Boondoggle. That word just made me giggle.?

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  • It's 49 miles between LAX and Corona (as the crow flies).
  • imageIsabella T.:
    It's 49 miles between LAX and Corona (as the crow flies).

    Thanks!

  • imageannak23:
    I would either go & stay with his family to save money (also depends on your relationship with them) or I wouldn't go at all.  I hate travelling alone, but if I would have to do it alone with a child & all of their stuff, that's a double NO.  I'd rather stay home with the child than spend a week in a hotel.  It's no fun staying in a hotel with a toddler. Can you talk him into just going for the time he needs to be there for business?

    I can't think of anything worse than staying with DH's parents. I love them, but they don't have an extra bedroom, and we'd have no privacy. Plus, like I said, DS will be up by 5 a.m., which would be really disruptive.

  • Nope... I'd totally go and make the best of it.  Take day trips, go to the beach, the museums, etc.  I think it sounds like a blast.
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  • You obviously don't want to go. You are negative about any suggestion that anyone has. Just tell DH you don't want to go and be done with it.
  • imageans1999:
    You obviously don't want to go. You are negative about any suggestion that anyone has. Just tell DH you don't want to go and be done with it.

    Well... I kind of have to agree with this post.  I was coming back to say something else but she's right.  

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  • I'd be booking the flight!

    I took DH and DD with me on a work trip, spent half the time with them and the other half in meetings.  DH and I both agreed that I had the short end of the stick. :) He had tons of fun with DD while I was working.

  • imageEliseB0323:
    imageIsabella T.:

    If it were me, I'd be packing my bags already. What fun!

    As for the time in the hotel, why not explore your environment? Shopping, museums, luncheons... tons of things to do.

    I see this as a great time :)  Travel

    Here's the deal -- we are going to be in Corona without a car (unless we decide to rent two cars, which just seems ridiculous.) How are we going to explore our environment? If we were actually in LA, it might be fun. There's not much we can walk to from the hotel.

    image
  • imageEliseB0323:

    imageIsabella T.:
    It's 49 miles between LAX and Corona (as the crow flies).

    Thanks!

    With traffic add 2 hours
    image
  • there ain't_shit to do in corona. ?you're a good hour-plus from the west side, and you'll face tons of traffic coming and going.

    plus, like PP said, you obviously don't want to go anyway. ?skip it and stay home.?

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  • I hate the Nest...keeps messing up my reply.  I live in Corona & there is nothing to do here, you will have to rent a car.  Unless you just want to sit by the pool all day.   Also you can ride the Metrolink train out of Corona (has 2 train depots) it has stops in Anaheim (Disneyland), Orange (old antique stores cute area) Oceanside (touristy, beach, shopping, dinning) that is a thought too.
    image
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