My turn to vent! Re: DH & MIL

JenandChris06

Okay, obviously I'm not stressed enough taking care of two 2 year olds and 2 two month olds all day because DH feels like I can handle more.

DH is starting 12 hour shifts/7days a week at work Saturday for an undetermined amount of time and it is required, so it was decided a while ago that my mom would come stay for two weeks to help me with the kids.  My stepdad is bringing her out but he's only staying through the weekend.  Well, DH's brother just called and informed us that he was giving us his crappy beatup truck (another sore point with me because we don't need it) and is bringing it out Saturday.  How is he getting back to Ohio?  Oh, well, their mom and grandmother were going to come out too and visit and he's riding back with them.  WHAT??  Are you freaking kidding me??  MIL is on my $hit list anyway because she always finds some reason to get mad at me and make a scene (at her last visit she stormed out at 11pm and drove back to Ohio because my CAT came into the living room!) and now I'm being TOLD that her, her mom, and DH's brother are coming out Saturday while MY mom and stepdad are here, AND DH is working AND I've got 4 screaming kids.  No f*cking way.  I told him how I felt and that he needs to call her and tell her it's NOT a good time, and of course he got mad.  Then I changed it to fine, you set it up then so that you're here when they come and I can avoid her, and then I walked away. 

UGH, I am fuming right now.  MIL pulled this same crap when Logan and Alyssa were born and my dad was staying with us, seeing the babies for the first time.  She just happened to be passing through GEORGIA and wanted to see the babies.  She showed up and Dad couldn't even get near the babies.

Someone please tell me that I am not overreacting cuz that is how DH is making me feel.  "It's no big deal.  I don't see why you're getting all pissed off."  Of course it's not a big deal to you cuz you won't be here!!!

 Okay, rant over...on here anyway.  My head is still racing.

We don't need the stupid truck anyway.

jlc071903

First off...you are my hero, having 2 sets of twins...you're awesome!

Second of all...that is WAY too many people in one house and WAY too much stress for YOU...DH either needs to be there the WHOLE time MIL is there OR she needs to wait until next weekend to come. I HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE last minute things...esp when people forget how difficult last minute is for those who are being inconvenienced (i.e. YOU).

VCMCG

You are not crazy-Dh needs to tell them to come at a different time.  It's just not do-able for you.  The last thing you need is more stress.  I would be OK with your suggestion of him being there when the car drop off thing os set up-b/c I tell my DH the same thing-that it's a lot more comfortable and tolerable when he is here with them so I can escape if I need to.  It's annoying that  they are making plans without consulting with you-that is a pet peeve of mine that my MIL does all the time. 

Good luck!

Mrs. Destructo

OMG, no freaking way!! Are all of those people planning on sleeping at your house? I can't imagine having all those people in my house

CMW

Nope, you are totally not overreacting!  Your DH needs to ballz up and tell his family that time is not going to work.

I'm so sorry you are having to deal with this!

 (((HUGS)))

kyluvsaj

Um yeah.  Exactly HOW big is your house?  I would tell him they can all come but have to stay in a hotel.  Guest room is booked!!!

That is crazy!

Empwr

LOL my MIL is from Ohio and shes just like that! HAHAHA . You are completly right! Tats WAAAAAYY too many people in the house at one time, while taking care of 2 sets of twins. I agree hat you DH should be there to entertain HIS family if he wants them to come at the same time.

JenandChris06

I don't even want them to stay at a hotel because that would mean they would be coming back!  Sometimes MIL is okay, but 85% of the time she's uppity, bossy, pushy, and thinks that she is above everyone else.  Of course DH never confronts her about anything or says no to her.  I don't blame her for wanting to see the kids, but it's totally not right for her to infringe on other peoples time with them, or MY time with the other people.  What if I had plans to take the kids somewhere with my parents on Saturday?  Did anyone even consider what I  wanted?  Nope.  I'm just supposed to bow down and welcome them with open arms?  HA!  Guess again. 

Can I also vent about the last time she was here again?  She came to watch Logan and Alyssa while I was giving birth and for a few days after I came home.  I'm supposed to be taking it easy and still had a hard time standing and walking (c-section), yet CONSTANTLY she was telling me to watch the kids while she went for a smoke, or wanted to run to this store or that one.  Umm, okay, thanks for your help.  Or how about calling DH and I as we are at the pedi with the babies and she was watching L&A, asking us much how longer are we going to be because she just made a 5:00 appt. to get hair nails done, and it was like 4:30!  Then that night she left unexpectedly and drove 4 hours back to Ohio because my cat came too close to her (she's afraid of it).

Ugh, here I go again..

MrsEABarton

I would make plans with your parents for all of Saturday... take the kids to the museum or someplace, "since you've got your parents as extra help".  Tell the H that it was already planned and the tickets are already purchased, so you can't buy extra ones for MIL.  Escape while you can.

sfitz0711

JenandChris06:

 Then that night she left unexpectedly and drove 4 hours back to Ohio because my cat came too close to her (she's afraid of it).

 

I think you need to tuck some catnip in MIL backpocket so the cat doesn't leave her alone!  Then she'll leave immediately!!