Nothing like get a scathing email at 8:30 am from a parent

Rebekah1021

We have a little dance troupe for girls ages 7 - 12 at our church. The leader just had a baby and is taking some time off and I am filling in for her. I taught the girls a dance for the church Mother/daughter banquet. They have been asked to do the dance again on Sunday for Mother's Day.

The girls wear a white leotard and burgundy pants. A few of the girls are starting to develop breasts. So, I sent an email to the parents reminding them of what to wear and to ask all the kids to wear a white tank top at min. under the leotard. I did not name names and didn't say that they need to wear a bra (although, one of the girls is at least a c cup already). We have a lot of people who are bussed into church from the homeless shelter and frankly, I don't anyone oogling the girls and am trying to teach them about modesty in the church. I don't care what they wear or don't at home.

I get a email from one of the moms asking why am I making so many "stupid" rules and that I am only filling in. True, I am only filling in, but I didn't make any rules, I just asked they they wear a tank top under their leotard. I am not going to email he rback, but will call her because I want my tone to be clear and explain that now that I am a mother, I wouldn't want to put my daughter out in front of people where people can notice how her boobs are growing. What's funny, is that her daughter is the one with the biggest boobs and really needs a bra, which I am going to have to tell her.

joseysbride

Sounds like it's time for new outfits!  I wouldn't want to be in your position.  Dealing with parents is not fun.

lilpiglet

i feel bad for the little girl.  You would think her mom would be happy you are asking they wear something under their leotard, that way none of them "stand out"

i hope after you talk to her she understands and instead of being snippy is thankful for what you are asking "costume" wise.

esposa38

Yikes! I wouldn't tell her that her daughter needs a bra, or say anything about anyone ogling anyone's pre-adolescent children.  I'd just say something very generic, very sweet, but very clear, about how sometimes white leotards are a little less opaque than they might seem, especially up on stage under the lights, and I know that people might not have realized this, and I also know that everybody would want to avoid a potentially embarassing moment for their daughters, so I wanted to "strongly encourage" everyone to wear a tank top underneath. Thanks and have a great day!  KWIM?  Keep it short and sweet. Good luck!

pincushions

I don't think there is anything wrong with what you wrote. That mom is a dumbass and just wants to _bitch about something.

 

side note... I do not and WILL not  make anything in white tanks for girls over 9. Most clothing over that size I line because they need it.

Rebekah1021

pincushions:

side note... I do not and WILL not  make anything in white tanks for girls over 9. Most clothing over that size I line because they need it.

I think the same thing. I just think that stuff looks better lined, no matter what age.

esposa38

PS- I meant yikes about the mother's email, not your reaction to it. I agree w/ you!  I'm just thinking as a former teacher/administrator, it's always better to not say anything personal or specific about a kid unless it is absolutely necessary, especially in a situation like this. 

belle204

I'm having flashbacks to an incident in h.s. when I forgot the vest that went over our white leotard in color guard. Since I didn't have mine, no one could wear theirs ... let's just say there were lots of band-ainds involved.

Good luck! She'll (mom) be ok.

grja

Good luck!

I wouldn't specifically say her daughter needs a bra or that her daughter is one of reasons why you sent it out. I would just say "well, some girls are more developed than others. So instead of having one girl stand out with a tank top and embarassing her, i thought it would be better for all the girls to look the same".

Maybe she'll get the hint.

pincushions

I am sorry as a mom I would think that making sure her DD is in modest clothing (especially a leotard) is top priority.

She (or they depending on how many girls) is obviously  clueless that her daughter's headlights are visible for the congregation to see. So I think saying something to her like "I am just taking preventative measures and nipping this concern in the bud to make all the girls as comfortable as possible."