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Parenting after a Loss
Gregsbride22
member
From SAL, very sad, just told I probably can't BF
Gregsbride22
member
DH & I went to meet with our group of pedi's that we decided on. I have rheumatoid arthritis and have been on Enbrel for the past 2 years. This drug is fairly new, but was approved for my pregnancy by multiple doctors (won't pass through the placenta). The docs tonight said that they probably wouldn't recommend BF'ing with me being on Enbrel. If I stop taking the drug I will have trouble functioning and my arthritis will get worse. This is SO upseting to me and I've been crying about it since we left. I know it's not the end of the world or anything, but I thought I was going to be able to BF. Thanks for listening and I'll take any words of encouragement if you've got them 
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Re: From SAL, very sad, just told I probably can't BF
O I am so sorry! Is there any other med they can try that would be safe??
((hugs))
could you stop taking it for just a week or so to BF?
I certainly understand you being upset, but like you said it's not the end of the world and what's best for you will be best for your lo. It's important for you to be able to function normally and be comfortable too. Good Luck!
Before you count yourself out....I would call a lactation consultant. We were told at our BFing class that there are very few meds that would make you not be able to BF. There is a comprehensive list or website somewhere.
(((HUGS))) I'm so sorry. It's so hard when someone else tells you you can't do something that you've been planning to do. I BF my DD for 15 months and hoped to BF my son even longer. I was told to wean him at 6 months because of food allergies that we couldn't control. I was heartbroken. It's losing that picture in your head of how things are going to be that is really hard to deal with.
That said, FF has turned out to be a WONDERFUL thing for our family. I felt very "free" after weaning. I was no longer the sole source of food for DS. DH could help with night feedings and give bottles through the day. It turned out to be a nice thing to have a little down time while someone else fed DS.
I know it's not what you planned, but in the end it will be best for you and your little one. You will have the meds you need and you won't have to worry that they will in anyway effect baby. A happy mommy = a happy baby. Always. And your little one will still be happy, healthy and very loved no matter how you feed him/her. I know it will take time to get used to the idea, but it will get better. ((((HUGS))))
(m/c 1.17.07, m/c 5.15.07)
DS - 03.15.08
DD2 - 12.03.09
DD3 - 3.28.11
Unfortunately there's not much out there that is effective & safe. The safest drug is probably prednisone and that just would treat the symptoms of arthritis and would not prevent joint damage.
(((hugs)))
I couldn't BF, my boobs were broken and I couldn't produce any milk. I was devastated and unprepared. But I've since learned that it's ok. Formula is not poison, your child will grow up strong. Yes, I went through the mommy guilt with it, but I "grieved" that loss and moved on because I had a baby to feed, whatever way I could. At least you know in advance and can prepare for it.
There's lots of benefits to FFing! DH can feed your child as much as you can, which means in the middle of the night too! If you're modest, you don't have to worry about NIP. You don't have to worry about supply issues or how much they're getting. I'm not saying one is better than the other, but just realize that FF isn't a bad thing either!
I can relate to what you are going through. ?I planned to BF, had done a bunch of research, bought a pump so I could pump at work and everything. I BF in the hospital, ended up with bleeding/cracked nipples etc. ?I was fighting through the pain b/c it was so important to me. ?My DD ended up with a genetic condition (galactosemia) and does not have the enzymes to process lactose. ?I had to stop BF immediately and feed her only soy formula. ?I had to throw out what little I had stored in my freezer and cried about it.
In the end, we do what is right for ourselves and our babies. ?FF has ended up working out. ?DH is very involved and can share the workload and let me get more sleep. ?DD is happy, growing well and other than smelly breath from the formula, she is great! ?
Best of luck to you.?
I have a low supply and we have to supplement with formula. So from someone who knows both sides: I too thought not being able to BF exclusively would devastate me. But it hasn't been so bad. DH and my mom like being able to feed her too. The only thing I am bummed about is the cost of formula. It's an expense we really hadn't counted on.
One the upside, FFing really allows you a lot more freedom. When we nurse that is ALL I can do, for hours on end. A bottle is done in 20 minutes and she's happy as a clam. It's a lot easier to go out and get things done when you're bottle feeding, even if you don't have someone else feeding the baby. And I love how she gazes at me when I give her a bottle. When I nurse her she doesn't look up at me the whole time.
In the end though, it's whatever you have to do to keep your baby happy and healthy. You'll both be just fine.
This happened to me too. It is hard to make the adjustment when you really just aren't prepared, but I've also learned that formula isn't the worst thing in the world and there are definitely benefits. The most important thing for baby is a happy healthy mom. (((hugs)))
ditto this. There is a book called Medications and Mothers Milk..that most LCs have.. and kellymom.com has a pretty thorough list.
m/c 1/2/08 and 3/12/08
Eve Amelia- Born 2/24/09. 6lb 9.9oz
Natalie Ruth - Born 6/13/11 7lb 6.6oz
I will definitely look into this too, thanks!
I have the newest copy of Medictions and Mothers Milk (the 2008 edition). I wasnt sure I was going to be able to BF either- I have colitis and am on meds. I was devestated and having a hard time dealing with it so I totally understand what you are going through. Stopping my meds was not an option- it was never even mentioned by my drs nor did I consider it myself. As everyone has said, a happy and healthy mommy is most important. Tons of babies thrive on formula every single day and you will still be albe to bond with your LO. In the end my Dr and pedi decided that the benefits outweighed the risks and I should nurse DS but it was a tough decision. DS has never had an issue and is incredibly healthy thank goodness.
Your med is categorized as L3= moderately safe. No one is going to tell you that it is without risk to nurse your baby while on this med however some may say that the benefits outweigh theoretical risks. Maybe you could do some more research and decide for yourself, with the help of your Drs. I wont type out the entire report on your medication but to quote directly from the book:
"Due to the enormous molecular weight I still believe it is extremely unlikely that clinically relevant amounts would transfer into milk in actively breastfeeding mothers. In addition, due to its protein structure, it would not be orally bioavailable in an infant. Infliximab (remicad) is somewhat similar and is apparently not secreted into human milk."
If you want me to copy the pages regarding enbrel and mail them to you I would be happy to do so. Good luck with such a difficult decision.
oh no - I am so sorry to hear that. Im sure your baby will do wonderfully on formula but it must be hard to not have a choice.
I do remember reading/hearing a lot about how good the colostrum is. Is there a way you can not take them just the first day or two and bf for that? Just trying to brainstorm other options for you since it isn't always all or none.
There are definitely a lot of pluses to not bfing that you can focus on.
This is great information. I have a similar book, and the gist of it is, you'd be amazed at what doesn't make it into breastmilk. Our bodies are amazingly efficient at filtering unnecessary things out of breastmilk. If they weren't, we'd be passing all sorts of toxins onto our babies, including foods they shouldn't be eating.
If breastfeeding is important to you, it's worth seeking a second opinion. Then you can make an informed decision. Sometimes doctors are just over-cautious when there is not enough information. Good luck!
Sweetie, I'm so sorry you are disappointed. Many of the PPs have said what I would also say- that there are advantages to FF, and that your child will thrive on formula.
I also want to ask you- what is is that is most sad to you about not BFing? Is it that you won't be able to bond as well? B/c that simply isn't true. There is a lot of propoganda out there against FF and the fact is, you get to stare into your LO's beautiful face every time you give them a bottle. It's magical. And they grab your hand, and snuggle into you... all things that I was afraid I'd miss out on since I couldn't BF either.
Or is it that you think you're doing your child a disservice? B/c you're not. I can send you some info if you want, but there are some very interesting articles debunking all the "breast is best" hype. I really don't mean to sound anti-BF- I think its wonderful- but I hate that this issue causes so much stress and anxiety for those of us who cannot or chose not to BF. Formula is also great- they make improvements all the time on it, and you can get organic formula if you want- it's pretty much the same cost as the similac or enfamil.... and FWIW, as for the immunity claims, I am one of only 2 FF moms in a local moms group of about 40 women, and almost every one of their BF babies has had a cold or ear infection, while my FF baby has resisted 2 major colds that I was miserable with- he was just fine. Never been sick a day in his life, except when he was on breastmilk and that was b/c he had severe milk allergies...:)
Anyway- I just want you to know that this is really a small part of motherhood- it's just food. Please don't let it ruin your first weeks as a mom, ok? Big hugs, and please feel free to page me if you need anything....
absolutely - hop on over to kellymom.com and post a message about this and someone can get you a second opinion.
Regardless of w/r you can BF or not, it has no bearing on what kind of mom you will be which is wonderful! Try not to let it beat you up, there are plenty of ways you can and will be able to bond with your LO w/o nursing.
Go Steelers!