New here-need some help

MrsRyan61804

After 4 long years of TTC, we are ready to start looking into adoption. We are new to all of this and have no idea where to start. If anyone can point me in the right direction, maybe suggest books or websites, I would be truly grateful. I have been looking at some websites, but they can be so overwhelming. Thanks so much!!

silliestbunny

I am sorry for your struggles TTC'ing.  It can be a long and lonely road.
Welcome...

 I am sure others will chime in but here's a few nuggets-

-  There are many "different" type of adoptions ranging from domestic infant to foster/adoptions to international adoptions.  This took us a while to sort out and find our path.  Understanding all types of adoptions may be a good place to start.

-  The basics are usually best found in books like Idiot's Guide to Adoption or Adoption for Dummies (you know....the bright yellow books that are "guides" to all sorts of things).  There are many other great books but for basic information and understanding the system, these are great starting points.  NOTE-  many large book stores don't carry many adoption books but most have one or the other of the above mentioned books.

-  Talk to you "neighbors".  Know what agencies are close by.  While it's not necessary to use a close agency, it's often a great resource in the understanding stage.

-  Stick around and ask questions.  The women (and occasional man) here are all in different stages of different types of adoption.  Our views are often different but it tends to be a supportive place to come for answers and support.

Dr.Loretta

silliestbunny:

I am sorry for your struggles TTC'ing.  It can be a long and lonely road.
Welcome...

 I am sure others will chime in but here's a few nuggets-

-  There are many "different" type of adoptions ranging from domestic infant to foster/adoptions to international adoptions.  This took us a while to sort out and find our path.  Understanding all types of adoptions may be a good place to start.

-  The basics are usually best found in books like Idiot's Guide to Adoption or Adoption for Dummies (you know....the bright yellow books that are "guides" to all sorts of things).  There are many other great books but for basic information and understanding the system, these are great starting points.  NOTE-  many large book stores don't carry many adoption books but most have one or the other of the above mentioned books.

-  Talk to you "neighbors".  Know what agencies are close by.  While it's not necessary to use a close agency, it's often a great resource in the understanding stage.

-  Stick around and ask questions.  The women (and occasional man) here are all in different stages of different types of adoption.  Our views are often different but it tends to be a supportive place to come for answers and support.

^all of this, especially the last point. People here can give great feedback on how they got where they are, and why certain situations worked for them. Sometimes it's nice to have someone in the process to bounce things off of.

 

LadyRed7

ditto to pp!

We are getting ready to sign on with an agency. I think what really helped us along the way, was honestly really opening up to people and letting them know our journey. You would be surprised who comes out of the woodwork that has either adopted, is in process or knows of someone. I have spent so much time talking to people on the phone and in fun coffee meetings picking people's brains. It is amazing the wealth of information that is out there, and for me and us, it has been so helpful to talk with people who have been through it. And.. they all wanted to share their experience so badly. 

Dragonfly_Bride

All of the advice above is excellent!?

I'm also reading "Adopting After Infertility" which has helped me work through some of the mourning that goes along with giving up ttc. It's very good, and I borrowed it from the library. ?I highly recommend it to anyone who's ready to jump to the next stage after IF.?

MyColonyNJ

Hey - I just answered your post on the NJ board.  Like I said - this board is GREAT

LadyRed7

Dragonfly_Bride:

All of the advice above is excellent! 

I'm also reading "Adopting After Infertility" which has helped me work through some of the mourning that goes along with giving up ttc. It's very good, and I borrowed it from the library.  I highly recommend it to anyone who's ready to jump to the next stage after IF. 

 

that reminds me, i need to order that one! I have heard it is excellent. 

Ranita

The others have suggested great things already, but I wanted to chime in to say welcome.  I'm sorry you've been struggling with ttc.  My DH and I have always wanted to adopt but didn't originally plan that it would be our first child, but after 3 years of wanting to be parents we decided to do it now.  Stick around and ask as many questions as you like and vent whenever you need to, and most definately let us know when you hit your milestones and exciting days, we all love to celebrate with each other!!