If you had the choice - kids 2 or 3 years apart?

twinsinapod

We're thinking about going for round #2 (hopefully just one this time!) in the fall.  But my biggest question is whether we could handle a new baby 2 or 3 years apart from the twins.  Their are pros and cons to both.  What are your thoughts?

debisheldon

Personally, if I had a choice, I would want my firsts to be out of diapers and in big kid beds before bringing in a new baby. I also think about college... 3 kids in college for 2 years or for 1 year.

Me and my brother (no multiples) we were three years apart.  I loved it. He was there to help me along but was gone to let me grow. Just my opinion.

macchiatto

I'm thinking 3 years--I agree with wanting the twins reliably potty-trained and in a big-kid bed before having another baby.

lajolla09.30.06

I sometimes wonder too... we always planned on 3 kids 2 years apart.  Since the first 2 were 7 minutes apart that plan went out the window

My siblings and I, and all of my husband's siblings are all 2 years apart and we couldn't imagine it any other way... but being pregnant with 1 year old twins seems a little overwhelming so we're re-thinking...

krisc

I'm doing two years apart.  I figured we'd "get it out of the way" and we aren't far enough away from those sleepless nights to have forgotten how much fun they are.  I also have this weird issue thinking that if this baby is another boy that it will be better for him to be closer in age to his older brothers.  The twins will be in the same grade, maybe play the same sports, potentially have the same friends etc....I want the third to not feel too left out of that.  I think (worry, fear, etc...) that if they were farther apart in age they would feel like a third wheel.  That's just my strange hang up though, definitely not the reason why we are pregnant again so quickly.

EverAfterinMi

If i'd had things my way...3 years apart.

Temp159135562506975

since you would be going from 2 toddlers + a baby (or two) - i'd say 3 y/o would be better.... for a lot of reasons.

DS is 2 y/o and i'm glad he won't really remember what it was like for him to be the "only child" - which I hear they do remember and resent if they are 3y/o+..... but since the twins never knew that feeling- they can't miss it- and hopefully by 3 you will have them out of diapers, and they are also so much more self-sufficient- and can communicate much better and understand more that you tell them.

It would be REALLY hard IMO to have two 2 y/o's and a newborn compared to two 3 y/o's and a newborn (or two)

hollyoid7

We were thinking 3 years apart. I don't know if we would have had another one after the twins.

mommyof4boys

I did 3 kids around 2 years apart.  Christopher's birthday is 4 days before the Jon and Matty turned 2.  It was hard BUT they didn't remember it.  AND, DH's cousin had her daughter 3 years after her son.  He was not happy.  He regressed with potty training, had behavior issues, etc.  We had our own behavior issues, believe me!  But, we bought a refrigerator lock to help.

bunny731

Interesting question because I was pondering the same thing. I am leaning towards 3 years because I am concerned that while pregnant picking the kids up (they need that more when they are 1-2) would be a strain on that pregnancy. Perhaps, not a good reason, but something I have been thinking about as well.

coffee bean

We're leaning toward 3 years too, for the reasons mentioned above.  At 3, they can communicate so much better, potty trained, etc.  But, the idea of trying to get pregnant again in only 1 year is a little daunting to me.  It may end up being closer to 4 years apart.  

I will say -- my sister and brother and I are almost 5 years apart each (10 years total).....and it's a big gap.  Although my sister and I are very close now, you don't really feel like you have much in common until the younger one reaches high school....and we fought like cats and dogs!!!

twinsinapod

Thanks y'all!  You all raise good pints to think about.  My sister and I are 5 years apart and we fought for 20 years.  DH and his sister are 2 years apart and are very close.  I appreciate all of your input

twinsinapod

points - not pints.  Although a pint or two would be good about now...  When does the babysitter get here?

Panda53321

I say 3, two is such a fun age of exploring I can't imagine trying to to do all of the fun 2 year old things with a newborn.