Working moms help

JustaKidAtHeart

I am an unemployed teacher.  I was sad after graduating that i couldnt be employed (stupid CA).  SO I subbed, then I got pregnant.  Then it wasnt so bad not having my own classroom.  DH can support us, things are tight but we make it work.  Today a friend emailed me.  Her school district is going to hire. Her school is going to hire.  She recomended me and they are interested. I was told to send in my resume ASAP.  Now I find myself torn about the extra money and leaving the boys.  I worked 6 years to get my 2 degrees.  I wanted to teach.  I also worked 2 years to get the boys.  I want to be the one to raise them.  I know we could provide more and better if I was working but I dont want to miss out on them.  Most likely these will be the only kids we have.  The school that is hiring is an hour drive with no traffic.  I know you cant make the decission for me but can you help me have an easier time with making it?

BabyDavison

I'm not a working mom BUT I am someone who was formerly VERY career focused and now I SAH.  Honestly, we have tight finances from time to time but we sacrifice to make it work until they are older- in school, etc.  And then I will have years and years to continue working on my career.  The way I see it, I can always go back to work later but I can never get back their "little years".  That said, I totally respect working moms and I think this is a very personal choice and what's right for me may not be right for everyone else.

 Good luck with your decision!

Jessarella

BabyDavison:

I'm not a working mom BUT I am someone who was formerly VERY career focused and now I SAH.  Honestly, we have tight finances from time to time but we sacrifice to make it work until they are older- in school, etc.  And then I will have years and years to continue working on my career.  The way I see it, I can always go back to work later but I can never get back their "little years".  That said, I totally respect working moms and I think this is a very personal choice and what's right for me may not be right for everyone else.

 Good luck with your decision!

DITTO!

CMW

This is my third week back at work.  It is hard but it's totally workable.  I really do love my job and although I would love to be a SAHM it's just not possible for us.

I think bottom line it comes down to what you feel comfortable with and what you want to do.  There would not be anything wrong with interviewing and moving forward with the possibility.

Good luck with whatever you decide!

SportsLover

I am a teacher and am back to work.  The decision to go back was honestly the best for me personally.  I like having my own life outside of the boys, contributing to our household finances and most importantly I like my job. 

I will be honest that I second guessed my decision for weeks before I returned.  Like you, I wondered if leaving them was the wrong decision and if they would become more attached to their caregiver.  However, once I was back in the swing of things, I was very happy and realized that I can be a working committed parent.  Part of my easy transition was also the fact that we hired a nanny and my commute is only 10 minutes. 

An hour commute is rather lengthy in my opinion.  Could you possibly look for another position closer to your house?  I'm not sure if I could manage being in the car for over an hour each way.  You have worked really hard for your degree.  Why not consider subbing in a few local districts to see if you like them, then trying to get in?  Good luck with whatever decision you make.  As a teacher, I feel very fortunate to have a full-time job with so many days off.  I do not feel like I am missing out in my boys' lives.

lutzcowgirlie

Have you actually taught before vs.subbing? What would you be teaching?

 

I know a lot of people who are happy going back to teaching. I was a teacher before and couldn't go back to it - not that we can afford it anyways, in FL my salary would pay daycare + about $100 a month.

 

Anyways - the first year teaching was so much work. And, depending on your subject/grade level it can stay so much work. I taught high school English/Journalism. I regularly arrived at school by 7:30 and stayed until 4:00 every day, sometimes as late as 11:00 for yearbook deadlines and after school activities. My commute was about 45 minutes, so I left the house early, got home late, and brought home work. I was teaching 120 students, so grading a two page paper meant reading 240 pages.

 

Just saying to consider what it will really mean for you, as far as a commitment.

CMW

PS  I have a 45 minute per way commute.  I use this time to make my calls and decompress.

 

Kim&Jim

BabyDavison:

I'm not a working mom BUT I am someone who was formerly VERY career focused and now I SAH.  Honestly, we have tight finances from time to time but we sacrifice to make it work until they are older- in school, etc.  And then I will have years and years to continue working on my career.  The way I see it, I can always go back to work later but I can never get back their "little years".  That said, I totally respect working moms and I think this is a very personal choice and what's right for me may not be right for everyone else.

 Good luck with your decision!

Ditto!  I would rather them not have the latest and greatest toys and clothes and be able to stay at home with them.  Sure it would be fun to shop at the Gap all the time and not worry about finances but at the end of the day, their Target clothes cover their little bodies just fine and nothing can replace the time I am spending with them.

weemodin

JustaKidAtHeart:

  I also worked 2 years to get the boys.  I want to be the one to raise them. 

I work full time, and I (along with my husband) raise my kids...  Working does not mean that someone else raises your kids.  Period.

In this economy, I would take the job provided you will make enough money to cover the cost of childcare, your commute, and then some.

bunny731

weemodin:

JustaKidAtHeart:

  I also worked 2 years to get the boys.  I want to be the one to raise them. 

I work full time, and I (along with my husband) raise my kids...  Working does not mean that someone else raises your kids.  Period.

In this economy, I would take the job provided you will make enough money to cover the cost of childcare, your commute, and then some.

Weemodin-well said.

And how long did it take for DH to "get the boys." Because by that logic if he is working-he technically would not be 'raising' your boys. I understand the desire to SAHM- this particular logic takes dad out from the equation.

bunny731

Kim&Jim:

BabyDavison:

I'm not a working mom BUT I am someone who was formerly VERY career focused and now I SAH.  Honestly, we have tight finances from time to time but we sacrifice to make it work until they are older- in school, etc.  And then I will have years and years to continue working on my career.  The way I see it, I can always go back to work later but I can never get back their "little years".  That said, I totally respect working moms and I think this is a very personal choice and what's right for me may not be right for everyone else.

 Good luck with your decision!

 

Ditto!  I would rather them not have the latest and greatest toys and clothes and be able to stay at home with them.  Sure it would be fun to shop at the Gap all the time and not worry about finances but at the end of the day, their Target clothes cover their little bodies just fine and nothing can replace the time I am spending with them.

Working parents also shop at Target. And my children wear clothes from Goodwill. It is a misnomer that people work for the purpose of buying things they don't need. But perhaps you would if you worked- if that is what you are saying. I am not worried about our finances and wouldn't be if I SAHM either.

 

JChandlerJBates

I work a full time job and haven been back to work for about 6 weeks now since the boys where born.  I wish I could be a stay at SAHM, but I carry our insurance. 

We could manage on DH's income, but I feel its good for our child's social skills to be at daycare.  We found a daycare that we love and that the boys love.  That's the key.

Good Luck