skeeved out by BFing

mags2144

Hi ladies-

Were any of you weirded out by the idea of breastfeeding while you were PG with your first?  My rational brain comprehends all of the benefits, and of course understands that it is a very natural thing, but honestly I am totally weirded out by BFing.  I can almost picture myself BFing a newborn-- maybe up until 3 or 4 months old.  But then after that, the idea just seems strange to me.  Did any of you feel this way-- and if so, how did you get over it?

7river7wed7

I grew up...

I don't mean to be snarky, but I think the fact that it "skeeves" you out is very imature.

14years

Before getting pregnant, I never thought I would BF.  I was just not interested in it.  Once I was pregnant, I took a BF class and still was a little . . . embarrassed, I guess, is the right word, about nursing, but I knew it was the best thing for DS.  So I thought I would do it for 3 months and then stop when I went back to work.  When DS was born, it still seemed a little strange, but it felt so right.  Well, my DS is 8 1/2 months old, and we still EBF.  I am going for my goal of a year, but I am fine with him weaning well after that, whenever he is ready.  DH calls me a lactivist now, which I am.  I truly love it now and would not trade BFing for anything.

So, yes, I underwent a pretty radical transformation.  Perhaps you will, too!  I'd say taking a class, reading some books about it, and getting all your supplies together will make it seem less strange to you.  And then when you actually do it, hopefully, it will seem completely right to you.  That's basically what happened to me.

Good luck!

7river7wed7

I'm going to start over because I kind of feel like a jerk now. I think adversions to bfing are very common in American culture.

I think a lot of people overcome their misconceptions when they become more educated on the topic. I would highly suggest checking out several bfing books from your local library. Also, read up on websites like kellymom.com.

While all bfing is good for baby, I would encourage you to read up on the benefits of extended bfing too because the value of it continues to grow the longer you do it.

I also wouldn't put a timeframe on how long you're going to bf. A lot of people say "I want to make it to 6 months" and at that time they quit because they reached their goal -- it's OK to just play it by ear and decide on the fly when is a good time to wean because you may think now that 3-4 months is your limit, but once you get there you may feel very differently when you realize how dependent DC still is on you at that age...at that time you haven't even started solids yet, so breast milk is still the only source of nutrition.

mags2144

Thanks for the responses ladies-- I will definitely do some more research. 

juniper19

One of the things about being a parent is that we do things we couldn't imagine doing.  Cleaning up vomit skeeved me out before dd, but I had to do it.  DD didn't toilet train until she was over 3.  You can imagine what those diapers were like!  But I did what I had to do.

That's OK that BFing seems weird to you.  And honestly, unlike dirty diapers you don't have to deal with it if you don't want.  You can formula feed and your child will be fine.  But the reality is that once the baby is here a lot of things that seemed impossible will be be possible and it would be a shame if you didn't even try to BF just because it seemed strange.  The fact that you are on this board asking about it indicates that part of you wants to try it.  So go ahead and then if your feelings don't change you can wean. 

Asquared

sounds like you are aware of the incredible unmatchable benefits to the baby- here are additional selfish reasons to keep in mind:

no $$$ forked out on expensive formula, incredible bonding between mother and child, no prepping bottles in the middle of the night, you can do it anywhere, and your boobs look way better filled with milk than pancaked against you sitting there empty.  :-)   give it a solid try with an open mind- good luck!

jen5-03

I was uncomfortable with the idea of BFing an older child, say one over a year. That was really weird to me. I went to a couple LLL meetings before DD was born, and of course everyone at the meetings nurses their babies at the meeting and I thought it was very odd to see these walking toddlers come up to their moms to nurse. (off-topic, but I highly recommend going to LLL even before your DC is born, it was VERY helpful for me)

But when it was MY child... she was just so tiny, so dependent on me, and BFing was such a huge comfort to her that it just seemed natural, even when she got older.

I BFd her until 16mo. And only quit because of medical issues I have with TTC, not because it was getting gross to me. Now I totally see how someone could nurse a 2+yo.

BridetobeEm

I could have written your post many months ago.  The idea of BFing grossed me out to be honest.  But, I wanted to give it a shot b/c I knew it was the best.  In the begininng it hurt so badly, my son had a horrible latch, my nipples cracked and bled like crazy.....it was awful.  But for some reason, I refused to quit and sought out a lactation consultant.  I am so glad I did.  It took awhile to get the hang of things, which was all I wanted, but I surprisingly ended up LOVING it too.  I just think BFing creates such a special, indescribable bond.  I (obviously) highly recommend giving it a try.  And I don't think you have to worry about getting over your feelings of strangeness.  They will go away.  Trust me!! 

mjcleve

I wasn't exactly "skeeved out" but I understand what you mean.  I really didn't know if it would work for us and imagined myself only breastfeeding for 3-6 months.  I couldn't imagine breastfeeding for a year and possibly longer.  Now I'm almost to a year and can't imagine if we weren't breastfeeding.

Notwifezilla7

We just hit the year mark and we're down to 1 1/2 feedings a day. (She does a bedtime feeding and her AM snack). At the beginning, I totally couldn't wrap my head around the idea of BFIng for longer then a month or two at most. It's something that honestly is overwhelming at first, but then the more you do it the easier and more enjoyable it gets. I also remember looking at DD sucking away early on and thinking WTF? There's this kid going to town on my boob! Strange somewhat, but then when you think that that's why they're there!

I wouldn't say I was skeeved out by BFing, I think it was just the idea that it was all me was overwhelming. Once your DC is born, I say give it a try. If it works, great, if not, then you have formula. I suggest finding a good lactation consultant and more so, a support group. A lot of hospitals have support groups which can really make you feel so much better and competent. In hindsight, I wish I would have joined a support group early on, I think that might have helped me handle the emotional aspect of BFing better.

Like I said, DD just turn a year and we're still BFing. I personally am ready to stop as we are hoping to TTC soon, but a little part of me is sad now.

GL with whatever you decide. Just know, there is support out there!

MrsAmers

One of the things about being a parent is that we do things we couldn't imagine doing.  Cleaning up vomit skeeved me out before dd, but I had to do it.

Ditto this.  I had an easier time imagining myself nursing a newborn than an older infant or a toddler.  But by the time DD was 2 months old, nothing felt more natural to me than nursing her and I didn't even second guess the idea that I would try to go to a year.  And then I let DD self-wean and we BFed until she was 22 months old.  When I was pregnant I would have NEVER imagined that I would BF that long, but once I was doing it, I couldn't imagine weaning my daughter before she was ready.

Just focus on preparing to nurse your newborn to give him the best start you can, and after that you can take BFing on a day to day or week to week basis.