DH's family vent — The Bump
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DH's family vent

I couldn't post yesterday because of our internet problems, so I need to vent today about our weekend. Most of DH's family lives outside of Raleigh and refuses to travel. So, DH and I decided before Aubrey was born we'd take her to visit w/them before I went back to work and this was the weekend for the visit. I was already worried because Aubrey had her 2 month shots Thursday and I knew she wouldn't feel good Friday. She did fine on the car ride up, but let loose once we got there. His aunt (who he is very close to) walks in his cousin's house (where we stayed) and hears her crying and said "What are ya'll doin' to my baby?" Um, hello, I don't remember her birthing her, but I just brushed it off and explained about her shots. Aubrey was pretty fussy all night and his aunt insisted on holding her the entire night. She kept making the rudest or dumbest comments all night. For example, Aubrey has very good head control and doesn't like to lie down, she wants to be held sitting up to watch everything. His sunt said "Babies aren't supposed to be sitting up or holding their heads like that, her back must hurt" so she'd lay her down and Aubrey would start screaming and she'd ask what was wrong with her. Duh!. Or the worst comment, "You reckon your milk isn't strong enough because she is so little? Breastfed babies usually gow so fast" That really, really hurt my feelings since I don't have a lot of confidence sometimes in breastfeeding because of having thrush and her weight, but the dr said she is just a litttle girl and everything is fine. This was just the first night, many other dumb or hurtful comments were made by her and others on Saturday, especially after Aubrey was overstimulated by being passed to 20 different people and getting overtired, which led to more screaming. Let's just say it was a long weekend and I was more than happy to get home.

I'm not really looking for advice because I don't deal w/them often and can't say anything to them because they aren't my family. I just needed to vent because they made me feel like the worst mother ever and I needed to get that off my chest. Ok, vent over now.

Re: DH's family vent

  • I'm so sorry and know EXACTLY how you feel (I remember very well). It is so frustrating - but at least you don't have to deal with them often!

    Lots of hugs and I hope Aubrey is feeling better from her shots!?

  • I'm sorry, that sucks! I feel the same way when we have to do holiday's with DH's family. His aunt and uncle's house is small, hot, crowded and no one ever bothers to try and control his wild little cousins that run around screaming and knocking things over. We had lunch with them at a restaurant a few weeks ago and DH's aunt was so surprised that Maddie didn't cry the whole time. Part of it is just her age, but part of it is not being in that crazy environment!

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  • I'm sorry!  I don't know firsthand about dealing with annoying family members, but considering that's all about to change today when the flood of visitors come, I'm sure I'll have lots to vent about..just keep in mind that everyone has different views and ultimately yours are what matters...

    Hope Aubrey has recovered from her shots!

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  • how awful!!! I will probably be going through the same thing in a few weeks when the ILs come down. I TOTALLY understand your pain...and annoyance!

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  • that made me cry! Its amazing how hurtful people can be. Sorry you had such a rough time. That was sweet of you to go see them, they should have just enjoyed Aubrey & kept their mouths shut!
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  • That sucks!! And they refuse to travel?! Ummmm....next time they want to see her they should have to come see you after the way they acted!!
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  • Holy hell, the things that come out of people's mouth really amaze me sometimes.  I just hope you and your DH can look at each other after it's all over and laugh about it. 
  • imagebeshan:

    Most of DH's family lives outside of Raleigh and refuses to travel. 

    Be thankful!!!  =)

    Sorry it was a rough trip.  I would be really upset about all of that too.  At least it will be a while before you have to deal with them again!  Your DD is beautiful.

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  • Of course she was fussy...she just had her 2 month shots and then had to hear people saying mean things to her mommy and be laid down like she doesn't like to be. Sorry u had such a rough weekend...u did them a nice thing by brining her to see them. the least they coudl have done was keep their comments to themselves. and dont let them get u down about your milk and breastfeeding. U are doing just fine and tryign so hard to do what u feel is best for her.
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  • So rude! I hate dealing with people like that, especially when you feel like you can't say anything to them. (Although the older I get, the harder it is to bite my tongue!)
  • imageMrs.Beans:

    Your DD is beautiful.

    Thank you!

    DH just thinks I should have ignored it all. If it weren't concerning my child, I probably would.

  • So sorry, it sounds very frustrating - I'd need to vent too!  Glad you are home safe and sound - now you can relax! :)
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