Snappy comebacks

babyGsmama

How would you go about telling someone to mind their own business?  My husband's friend's wife (I have to be nice to her) is 2 months ahead of me in this whole pregnancy thing.  She is such a know it all, and it drives me bonkers.  In one hour she told me that my heels are too high to be wearing if I am pregnant, she can't believe that I am actually drinking ice tea, There is no way that I can actually feel movement at 20 weeks (I must be feeling gas), and the flashlight game is so dangerous.  She would never put her babies eye sight in jepordy like that.  The funny thing is, she is registered for a walker and she lives in a trilevel home with at least 2 steps minimum between each room.  I would not dare say a thing.  I don't think it is any of my business.  I hate being around her but have to sometimes.  Give me your snappy comments I can use on her the next time she opens her mouth.

BeeLove

"Here's my doctor's card.  Call her to discuss my issues."

Re: Ice tea..."I wonder what you would say about the coke I snorted five minutes ago in the bathroom."

Re: the heels ..."As long as my feet aren't swollen, I'm going to be sportin' my sitlettos...it makes my asss look less fat -  you should try it!"

Or you could just say "Thanks for your opinion, but could you please keep it to yourself.  Everyone is different and I'm happy with the way my pregnancy are going."

Perfectly.Imperfect

I'd say something along the lines of "I know you're an expert and all, but you must be absolutely miserable if you feel the need to project like that.  I'm enjoying my pregnancy and everything that I choose to do is fine with my doctor."

Dsm17

BeeLove:

Re: the heels ..."As long as my feet aren't swollen, I'm going to be sportin' my sitlettos...it makes my asss look less fat -  you should try it!"

 

Best comeback EVER!

CalinsBride

I dont know about snappy comebacks, but I think I would casually leave some literature about the danger of walkers lying around. Seriously. Then again I am a shameless safety fanatic. . .

dgurl26

I would have nothing nice to say to her.

2bemrs.bailey

Ask here where she got her medical degree? or tell her to mind her own Fing business! I have to listen to people all the time tell me stuff like that and I cant stand it!

babyGsmama

Dsm17:

BeeLove:

Re: the heels ..."As long as my feet aren't swollen, I'm going to be sportin' my sitlettos...it makes my asss look less fat -  you should try it!"

 

Best comeback EVER!

  

I agree!  Awesome comeback!  Keep'em coming.  I will have many opportunities to use them next weekend!

jjwheat1007

BeeLove - the coke line was great!

I think I'd probably say something like, "Okay, that's right!  I completely forgot that you were a doctor!  What was I thinking??  You must know everything, right?  Well, let's sit down here and I can pick your brain on my other issues!  You don't happen to have a degree in the psych field do you?  Because I tell you, I really need some advice concerning my S&M fetish!!"

mistresscox

Heels?  really???  I think heels may be the new lunchmeat...

I don't have any snappy comebacks that are nice.  I tend to just say what's on my mind, so I don't know how to sugar coat much. 

You could try and make her really uncomfortable (if it would work with her) and start asking her things that are maybe inappropriate in a group setting such as constipation, mucous plugs, popping zits...try and gross her out but be *really interested* in her opinions because she has *SO* much more experience than you. 

tanya8

BeeLove:

"Here's my doctor's card.  Call her to discuss my issues."

Re: Ice tea..."I wonder what you would say about the coke I snorted five minutes ago in the bathroom."

Re: the heels ..."As long as my feet aren't swollen, I'm going to be sportin' my sitlettos...it makes my asss look less fat -  you should try it!"

Or you could just say "Thanks for your opinion, but could you please keep it to yourself.  Everyone is different and I'm happy with the way my pregnancy are going."

I don't think I can top this post! 

suscq

jjwheat1007:

You don't happen to have a degree in the psych field do you?  Because I tell you, I really need some advice concerning my S&M fetish!!"

LMFAO!!!

Kendall13

BeeLove:

"Here's my doctor's card.  Call her to discuss my issues."

Re: Ice tea..."I wonder what you would say about the coke I snorted five minutes ago in the bathroom."

Re: the heels ..."As long as my feet aren't swollen, I'm going to be sportin' my sitlettos...it makes my asss look less fat -  you should try it!"

Love all of these!

Evelynsmom

How about "thanks but I didn't ask for your opinion" or if you don't feel like being nice "who the f^ck asked you?"