One time DH was oot for work and when he came back, I was pretty damn horny.
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So I got all dolled up, put on some heels and a waist apron (nothing else), and when I heard him come in I blocked myself with the fridge door being open and waited for him to come into the kitchen.
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When he came in and around to where he could see me/the fridge, I asked him if he though anything looked good enough to eat.
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Poor guy was so flustered/surprised he was just like "um no." And he was confused about why I was naked.?
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So of course I felt totally stupid and corny lol.
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Anyone else have a similar funny sexy FAIL??
Re: S/O "Surprise" below
HA!
I did the full on lingerie, heels, porn star hair one night for DH (who wasn't DH at the time) when he came home from going out with friends. He was so drunk that he just ran straight to the bathroom and then passed out.
He always asks me to dress up like that for him again but it totally wasn't worth the effort lol.
LMFAO!!!
hysterical
That story made me LOL.
I don't have one, I wish I did though. LOL.
Well, I told FI that I liked having my hair pulled sometimes during sex. Now he just does it randomly throughout the day. I told him to not do that, and he was like "I thought you liked it"....
Our very first time was a big fat FAIL. I was all over him. He waits until midway through and then says, "I can't do this."
Apparently he wanted to play the "sensitive guy" card. Uh..dude...you don't do that while you're inside me. You're supposed to do it before anything actually happens. I left crying and feeling like a whore. I forgave him though....obviously.
LMAO!.....that is hilarious!!!!
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Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahahahaha. I'm sorry but that is HILARIOUS. I can't believe your DH, or any guy, would wait THAT long to pull the sensitive card. ?
haha this is the best thread ive read all day. i needed to laugh this hard. unfortunately i cant think of a time that DH and I have been walked in on or anything, and if i ever came second after some computer game i dont think id be with him right now. There were a few times when we were living with his parents that we went out to dinner and there was road head involved on the way home...i always wondered what his dad thought when we walked in the front door and just ran to the bedroom. cause he would always sit right there on the couch and just look at us when we came in.
Did you know if you give a guy road head, he wont speed up to get home and do you, he will slow down so it takes longer to get home. Once i looked up and we were doing 45 on the freeway. I never understood this.