Dilemma

Carifly

BIL emailed DH and asked "How big is the empty space on Penny's wall, can you measure it for me and let me know how big of an oversized picture you have space for?"  So for her birthday he apparently wants to give her some sort of artwork/wall hanging. 

But I'd say there is a 80% chance that we won't like what he gives her.  And I'm sort of picky about what gets hung on our walls.  I also don't like the idea of a giant piece of art hanging over her crib.  But, I also don't want to hurt his feelings, which is likely to happen if we tell him we don't want him to give her the picture.

So, should we come up with an excuse, like we already bought something to fill up the space (which is borderline true, as we've been discussing several options for what we want to go there), or that we don't want anything hanging there so we don't actually have space.  Or should we just let him give her whatever he is planning.

I feel mean and petty regardless of what we do. :-(

Agrippa

Would his feelings get hurt if you told him that you're concerned about a giant piece of artwork being over her crib?  Remind him that babies like to touch and pull on the objects that they look at...

jlb7640

I think it is strange someone is requesting where you put their gift in your home. 

 

disbride061103

With DH's family, we could be honest, but with my family we would probably make up an excuse and tell them that we already bought something.  Since it sounds like it's going to be such a big piece, I wouldn't just let him give it to her.  It would be obvious that you didn't hang it and then if you couldn't return it, you would need to store it.  Is there any way your DH can find out what he plans on getting?  Tell him that you want to make sure it goes with the theme of the room?  That way you can see it before he buys it and give some input?

Carifly

I'm pretty sure it is something he is going to make for her, my guess is a giant Penny picture or something that he photoshops.  So, it is possible that I would like it, but based on the other things he emails me that he does with her pictures it is likely it won't be something I want to hang on her wall, you know?  I could be surprised though, maybe it is great- I just don't know.

And part of the issue is that he has mental illness and can be very sensitive- he's older than DH but permanently disabled, can't work, and lives at home with his parents.  So I don't want to hurt his feelings.

I'm thinking the best thing to do might just be to tell him we don't think it would be a good idea to have something large hanging over her crib?